Yeah, You
by Marvar
Summary: Bella starts a new school and is instantly attracted to Edward. Is the feeling mutual? Does her sister's wedding get in the way of her happiness? Read and find out. There's also a geek, French exchange student, and some laughs. Inspired by an 80s movie.
1. Ch 1 Take My Breath Away

**A/N**

**This is my first fanfic. Be kind.**

**Yeah, You**

**Chapter 1 Take My Breath Away**

_The beautiful, bronze-haired boy sat across from the beautiful, chestnut-haired girl. A birthday cake with seventeen candles sat between them. He leaned forward slowly and whispered, "Happy birthday, Bella. Make a wish."_

_Bella replied softly, "It already came true."_

I walked into Forks High School with a sense of confidence. Ha, that was a new feeling. This summer had been different than others. I had a best friend, a new look, and I was a senior. Yes, those lonely nights and summers of studying and taking extra classes had paid off; I was graduating a year early. Next fall I could go to Dartmouth like I always dreamed.

As I walked through the hallway of my new high school, I felt a sudden wave of nausea. People were staring at me. I wanted to retreat into my old, shy self. But I pushed my shoulders back and swore under my breath, "Not another year of this shit. Suck it up, Swan. You are not Frizzy Izzy anymore." That old nickname was never to be heard again. Now people would look at me because I was beautiful, not ignore me because I was shy and awkward. I owed this newfound confidence to my new best friend, Alice Brandon.

That five foot tall tornado of spiky hair and designer clothes had helped me transform myself this summer. Alice had straightened and styled my hair and advised me when I purchased a whole new wardrobe. She taught me all about hair products and blow dryers, which were especially necessary in the rainy town I now lived in. Now that my braces were off and I had filled out a bit, I almost believed that I could make a different life here.

I was so glad that I moved next door to such a fantastic friend. Right away we had hit it off when Alice came over with her parents to introduce herself. "Hi! I'm Alice. We're going to be best friends! I just know it!" she squealed when she saw me. Ha, she was right. That was two months ago. We had been inseparable ever since.

I approached the office to get my class schedule. "Oh my god, Bella, aren't you excited? We're seniors!" Alice screamed into my ear, making me jump.

"Jesus, Alice! You scared the shit out of me," I sputtered. "Stop sneaking up on me like that."

"Oh, Bella. You know I'm all wound up. This is going to be the best year ever. I know it," Alice beamed. Her blue eyes twinkled and her spiky black hair looked perfect as usual.

"I wish I had your confidence, Alice."

"Silly Bella. I know something great is going to happen for you and me this year. I can tell about these sorts of things."

I giggled. "You are probably right. I met you and now I look like a completely different person. That's pretty great."

Alice laughed, "I'm so glad your parents felt guilty about moving you from Arizona. That guilt money paid for a pretty fuckhot wardrobe, if I do say so myself. You are really working those skinny jeans and heels. You're going to get some major attention today. I already saw some guys checking you out."

"Yeah, right. They are just looking at the new girl," I said modestly.

"You're going to have to own that new look, Swan. I just helped bring out your natural beauty; you have to project the confidence to make it happen." Alice was right. Being the quintessential emo, self-conscious teen wasn't going to win me any friends or make me feel any better.

We walked into the office where I got my schedule and we compared classes. "Oh, we've got independent study and art history together."

"Perfect. Let me show you around the campus," replied Alice. "Who do you have for English?" she asked. I didn't answer. "Bella? Earth to Bella." Alice must have looked at me as I stared open mouthed at . . .

"Alice. Who. Is. That?" I asked in a daze.

"That my friend is the most popular boy in the school. He's captain of the basketball team, class president, and most likely will be the valedictorian. He also has a girlfriend," she added in a quiet voice.

"God, he's beautiful," I whispered in awe as I stared unabashedly at the boy with the bronze hair and green eyes. He was too perfect, too handsome to be real. While I was ogling this 6 foot tall Adonis, a gorgeous blond guy walked over to him and slapped him on the back. Damn, is everyone here in Forks supernaturally beautiful?

"That he is, but he's taken, really taken," said Alice sadly as she looked at me.

"Of course. I didn't think . . .I know I'd never have a chance with someone like that," I stammered and looked away.

"Bella, you could have any guy you wanted here. You really don't see yourself as beautiful, do you? I just meant that you would never try to steal a guy," Alice said as I blushed at her complement.

"Don't be ridiculous, Alice. I've never even kissed a guy, let alone had a boyfriend. I don't know how to attract boys. You are making me sound like I'm the new Megan Fox."

"Ew. She has those gross tattoos. You are much prettier than her, and Transformers 2 sucked. Come on, let's get to first period."

**JPOV**

Another year at good ol' Forks High. Fantastic. Maybe this is the year I grow a pair of balls and finally do what I want. I walked over to my best friend and slapped him hard on the back. "Hey man, we're seniors, and we're going to rule the school."

"Did you just quote a line from Grease?" he asked with a laugh.

"Yep. And you recognized it, so don't judge."

"Touché, my musical loving friend. That's my mom's favorite movie."

As we were talking he looked over at a girl I had never seen before. Wow, she was definitely going to cause a stir. She was a gorgeous brunette and she was talking to my Alice. She must have good taste in friends. I looked away from the new girl to stare at the object of my lust. I was in full daydream mode when he interrupted me with a question.

"Hey Jasper, who is that girl with Alice Brandon?"

"Oh, I think that's the new girl. She must be the new police chief's daughter, Isabella Swan. Hmmm, nice ass." The girls had turned around to walk to class.

"Shut the fuck up, Jasper. Stop checking her out."

"Dude, you pointed her out to me. You'd have to be blind not to see that. And speaking of fine asses, did you see what Alice was wearing?"

"Ha! I knew you had a thing for Alice."

"Shut up! And why are you checking out other girls, Mr. 'I Have a Girlfriend?' " I teased.

"You know all about that situation."

"Not all of it, but I know how stupid and complicated it is, and you don't really care about her. Dare I hope that the new girl might inspire you to solve this problem?" I asked.

"Maybe," he mumbled.

"I think we better get to class. You can daydream about Miss Swan in Calculus," I laughed as we walked away.

BPOV

As we walked to our first class I couldn't help obsessing over the impossibly gorgeous guy I had just seen. I knew it was ridiculous but I couldn't help myself.

We found seats in Art History next to each other. I couldn't take not knowing, so I leaned over and asked, "Alice, what is Mr. Perfect's name?"

She replied, "Edward. Edward Cullen."

**A/N**

**Reviews are appreciated.**


	2. Ch 2 Tempted

**A/N**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the rights; I own a GQ with Rob on the cover.**

Chapter 2 Tempted

**BPOV**

Art History was tedious at best. The only thing stopping me from falling asleep were the notes Alice passed me with lewd drawings of Mr. Perfect in various states of undress. Damn that girl could draw, too. I wondered if those drawings are anatomically correct. Focus, Swan. I think you just drooled.

The bell rang signaling our next class, and a temporary end to my smutty thoughts. I say temporary, because I know I'm going back to those images real soon.

I walked to AP English alone because Alice's class was in the Math building. I got there early because it was just down the hall. I had time to jot a few thoughts down in my journal before class started. The first day of a new school can be pretty overwhelming; writing always calmed me down. While I was writing, I noticed a few boys in class glancing my way, and it made me feel pretty good. Thank you, Alice, for the makeover assistance.

I smiled shyly to a boy sitting to my right. He had been staring at me since I walked in. He leaned over and said with a grin, "Isabella, right? I'm Tyler."

"It's Bella." We had a polite conversation and he seemed sort of interesting, but cocky.

Then he walked in.

Edward. Hair, face, eyes, body - damn, I missed that earlier -unbelievable. He was six feet of lean muscle straining against his tight t-shirt and jeans. He had a chiseled jaw, face carved out of perfection, and emerald green eyes framed by long lashes. He must have been genetically engineered for maximum hotness. He was inhumanly beautiful.

"What's up, Cullen?" Tyler asked. He nodded at Tyler. He barely glanced at me before taking a seat at the back of the room. My heart beat wildly at the thought of him being in the same room as me.

Class started and it was hard to not glance at him constantly, until he caught me that is, shit! He slightly raised his perfect eyebrow at me. I blushed furiously and turned away. Great. Way to be cool, Swan. I couldn't concentrate for the rest of the class. Lucky for me I had read most of the course work already. This class would be a piece of cake. I hurried out when the bell finally rang so I wouldn't embarrass myself further.

My next classes were pretty uneventful and I met Alice for lunch. She introduced me to Angela and Ben, her usual lunch buddies. They were really nice people that I could see myself hanging around with. Ben didn't involve himself with the girl gossip; he just adored Angela. Lucky girl. I wanted someone to look at me like that.

Alice pointed out the popular people - Lauren, Jessica, Tyler, Eric, Tanya. They had their "special" lunch table; of course that's where Edward sat along with the hot blond guy from earlier. He wasn't really participating in their conversation. He was sitting and reading a book. Damn, he read? Could he get any hotter? Hmm. He didn't seem to be the traditional frat boy–in-training that I would expect from a popular guy like him. I think I drooled again.

"Hello? Earth to Bella. I'm talking here," said Alice, waving her hand in front of my face.

"Sorry," I said sheepishly.

"I can't blame you for having a monster crush, Bell. He is unbelievably gorgeous. I just don't want to see you get your hopes up."

"I know Alice, but I just can't help it."

"Well, let's see if we can't find any unattached eye candy. What about Tyler? He seems to undressing you with his eyes as we speak," she said as she nodded in his direction.

I glanced at Tyler not fully looking up. He winked at me and gave me the look. You know, the 'drop your panties for me baby' look. No one had given it to be before, but I had seen it enough times when I went somewhere with my sister. Yuck. Like I was going to give it up for him. "He talked to me in my English class. Edward's in there, too."

"No shit?" asked Alice. "How did that go?"

"Well I just stared at him the whole time and he caught me looking at him," I said, embarrassed at my behavior.

"You were staring at Tyler for the entire English class? I bet he liked that," Alice teased.

"No, ass, I was staring at Edward!" I exclaimed.

Alice, Angela, and Ben all laughed. Alice continued with her explanation of Forks' social hierarchy.

I learned that the hot blonde guy was named Jasper and he was Edward's best friend. I had a feeling that Alice had a crush on him the way she sighed out his name. J_aaaa-sperrrrr._

"Alice, what's the deal with Jasper? And why am I just finding out about this now?" I inquired. This was something I had to know. Alice was not a person to keep secrets.

Alice sighed, "It's just so embarrassing. I've been in love with him since freshman year, and he doesn't know I exist. Well, kind of, but not really."

"What the hell does that mean?" I demanded.

"Uh, Bella, you aren't the only person to ever have an unfortunate short haircut and no figure. I tried to flirt with him freshman year and he thought I was a boy," she spat out quickly.

"No way!" I snorted.

"Yes, way. Especially since I had no fashion sense and no knowledge of make-up. He told me, 'Dude, I don't swing that way' and that was the last time I talked to him. That's when I swore to myself that I would change my appearance. I studied all of the fashion magazines and learned about clothes and makeup so that would never happen again. And Mother Nature finally granted me some curves that summer," Alice declared.

"I totally remember that day," Angela said. "Alice and I ate a couple of pints of Ben and Jerry's."

"I'm so sorry, Alice. But your knowledge has saved me from being a social outcast. And no one would mistake you for a boy, now. Is that incident why you don't sit with the popular table?" I was really curious about that because Alice was way hotter than all of the so-called 'popular' girls.

"Partly. But mostly because those girls are heinous bitches," giggled Alice. Angela snorted her soda through her nose. "You'll see. Especially Tanya. She's going to hate you."

"Why the hell would that glamazon give a shit about me?" I wondered, as I glanced at the blonde beauty with the pinched face.

"Because she can't stand competition from other beautiful girls. And you, Bella, are competition. Just look around. Notice anything?" smirked Alice.

I glanced around the cafeteria. There actually were several boys looking at me with a strange look that I didn't recognize. Was it. . . lust? Then I saw her staring at me. Tanya. She was shooting daggers out of her eyes.

"Now do you believe me? Oh, and Bella, she's Edward's girlfriend."

Fuckity fuck fuck.

**EPOV**

I'm glad I had music first period. Playing piano always calms me down. And trust me, I was excited after seeing her. Isabella. Shit. Just thinking about her makes me feel high. Not that I get high or anything. I mean I drink a little at parties, but I don't get carried away. My dad's a doctor for fuck's sake. Anyway, back to Isabella. She was fucking up my day and it had just started.

I couldn't get her out of my mind. Hair, face, eyes, body - I sure as hell noticed that - she was perfect. I know I caught her staring at me before school. Does she think I'm hot? Damn it, I really need to play the piano.

I played some of my favorite pieces and I felt much better. Until second period.

I walked into AP English like I owned the place, which I did because I kick ass in English, and there she was. She was getting chatted up by that asshat Tyler. Why the hell was she talking to that loser? I mean he actually called his piece of shit van "the pussy wagon." Although the stories I heard could actually justify the nickname.

I nodded at him when he greeted me, but I couldn't bring myself to look at her. I didn't want her to know I was interested in her. Wait. I can't be interested in her. I have a girlfriend. So I sat there and eavesdropped. He called her Bella. Hmm. I guess that's what she liked to be called. She didn't seem very interested in Tyler. Yes! She must be intelligent, too. Most of the stupid girls fell for Tyler's bullshit lines about being captain of the football team.

I tried to concentrate on the teacher, but come on, I already read all of these books. And she kept staring at me. I played it cool like I didn't notice, but I wanted her to look at me. I mean girls look at me all of the time, so what? No, I'm not conceited, just truthful. But usually they make me feel kind of slutty when they ogle me. And I'm not a man-whore. Quite the opposite. But Isabella, I mean Bella, just stared sweetly. It was intoxicating. And I'm feeling high again!

I tested my power on Bella by catching one of her stares with a cocked eyebrow. She blushed the most beautiful shade of red. Wow. I didn't think she could be more perfect. Tanya never blushed. She was shameless.

She stumbled out of class quickly when the bell rang. I got a nice rear shot of her walking out. Sweet. I trudged through the next few classes until lunch. Same people, different year. No one caught my eye like Bella. She was. . .different. Something about her made her special. Ok, now that was ridiculous because I haven't even officially met her. What is this, a cheesy romance novel? Did I get shot with heart-tipped arrow?

Once I got to the cafeteria, I took my required spot at "the" table, like always. I listened to my so-called friends' (except for Jasper-he was legit) inane conversations, and the girls talking shit about every girl in the room. Honestly, I wish I could just read my book. So I did, until I heard them bring her up. Bella.

"Honestly, Tyler, what could you possibly see in that mousy brunette? What's her name, Isabella? And look who she's hanging out with." The trio of girls cackled as Tanya made a face like she was sucking on a lemon.

My head snapped up at the mention of her name just as Tyler leered at Bella and then winked. I watched her reaction. She looked up through her ridiculously long lashes and blushed. But not like when she looked at me. She seemed grossed out by Tyler's attention. Yes! Score one for Cullen!

"Her name is Bella, and she's smoking hot. What, are you bitches blind or something?" said Tyler.

"No, just jealous as fuck that someone has joined forces with Alice and Angela against you skanks. Any attention they get makes you have to hike up your skirts even more. And if that happens, they're going to be headbands," Jasper spat out with more venom and emotion than I have ever heard. Fuck, I think he really does have a thing for Alice. And bravo, Jasper.

"Edward, are you going to let fucking Shaggy talk to me that way?" Tanya screeched. The other girls looked like they had been slapped. Except for Jessica. I don't think she understood what was going on. Maybe someone would explain it to her.

I laughed. "Did he hit a nerve?"

"Fuck you, Edward. You'll be sorry for this shit."

" What are you going to do? Break up with me? By the way, charming language. Make sure you write that into your Homecoming speech." Hell, I wish. I watched her give dirty looks to Bella the rest of lunch period. Tanya. Sigh. My "girlfriend." I was so screwed. Fuck. It was very clear to me that I was making a huge mistake with Tanya. I wanted Bella Swan. It's time to put an end to this charade, and Jasper was going to help me. It just might make both our dreams come true in the process.

**A/N**

**Reviews and suggestions are appreciated.**


	3. Ch 3 Every Rose Has Its Thorn

**A/N**

**I don't own the characters, but I do own a Team Edward t-shirt and a laptop so I can read fanfiction.**

Chapter 3 Every Rose Has Its Thorn

Alice and I walked slowly over to our next class. We had independent study together. We discussed the day's events and she continued to point out people to me. Soon I would know everyone, but that wouldn't be much of an accomplishment considering how few students there were in this tiny school.

As soon as I walked into class I heard, "What's up, Bella?" I turned quickly to see Tyler waving, and then I tripped and fell headfirst onto someone's lap. I heard a low chuckle, and a musical voice say, "You sure know how to make an entrance, Ms. Swan."

I looked up into the most beautiful green eyes I had ever seen. I stopped breathing when I realized whose arms were now wrapped around me, holding me from certain disaster. Oh god. Kill me please. I just made a spectacular fool out of myself by falling on Edward.

Alice giggled and yanked me up, too soon if you ask me. I could've stayed there all day, but that would be pretty embarrassing. "How did you know my name?" I stammered.

"Oh, I think everyone here knows your name, Bella," he replied softly. "Besides, Mr. Banner called roll during English class."

Of course. Stupid Bella. I practically ran to my seat, forcing myself to look away from his face. When we sat down, I glanced at Alice and mouthed 'Oh. My. God.' She shook her head and laughed, "Nice landing."

What the hell? I knew that I was awkward, but I've never been clumsy. Humiliating.

The rest of the class period was uneventful except for the glances I couldn't help but throw Edward's way. I learned that I was responsible for a senior project, hence the purpose of independent study. Finally, an intellectual challenge for me. I was actually excited for the first time today. OK big lie, I meant excited about school.

Alice and I discussed possible projects. She wanted to do a business plan for her own fashion design company and I wanted to publish my writing. I had been working on my journals for years now, and I had an idea to turn them into a novel. This could be a great class if I could tear my eyes away from Edward.

The bell rang, stopping our conversation. I groaned when I realized it was time for gym, the bane of my existence. My kryptonite. Hopefully I won't have to dress on the first day. Alice and I parted ways. I walked behind Edward trying not to get too close, so he wouldn't think I was stalking him, but he seemed to be going in the same direction I was. He couldn't have gym with me too, could he?

Yeah, so here I am in gym with someone's old gym clothes on because I didn't have any. Apparently here in Forks, gym is a big deal. That's why I had to take it again as a senior. And Edward Cullen is here too, of course he looks like an ad for Calvin Klein sportswear, not like a yard sale reject. Thank god he is on the other side of the gym, practicing with the basketball team. I can stare without him noticing.

The teacher partnered me up with a young blond-haired boy with braces. He had blue eyes, a baby face, and would be considered by most people as the quintessential geek. To me, having been in those shoes not so long ago, he was my peeps. Strangely, he stared at me like he just won the lottery. Wait, he can't think I'm good at sports, can he?

"How you doin' beautiful? " he asked like Joey from _Friends_' illegitimate son. "I'm Mike Newton," he said with a smirk. He held out his hand. Seriously, he smirked. Where does this kid get the balls?

"Hey, Mike. I'm Bella." I reached to shake his hand, and then he quickly pulled mine to his lips and kissed it. I couldn't help but laugh. "Smooth move. I should tell you in advance that I totally suck at every sport so you are doomed as my partner. I have trouble walking and not falling down over my own feet. You may want to talk to the teacher about switching partners."

"Are you kidding? This is the greatest day ever. I get to be partners with the most beautiful girl in school. My friends are peeing on themselves. They can't stop texting me. Can't you hear all of my alerts?"

I laughed at his joke. I heard some music from his pocket, the Star Wars theme. "Star Wars, huh, cool. That's one of my favorites. Last year I dressed like Princess Leia for Halloween. "

He got a pained look on his face and started sweating. "Will you marry me, Bella? You are awesome."

I laughed and patted him on the back. I made it through PE with no major problems; it was just the warm up exercises, though. Mike was really sweet, but he wasn't much better than I was. We talked about his friends, the geek squad, and how he was sort of the leader since he was a sophomore. He had skipped a grade like I did. PE mercifully ended pretty quickly thanks to Mike. "See you around, Mike," I said. He grinned and waved.

I changed back into my clothes and walked out to the parking lot to meet Alice. I noticed Edward and Jasper getting into a silver Volvo. Hmm, I expected him to have a flashier car.

On the way home, Alice and I chatted about how my first day was. She told me that she had sixth period with Jasper. I told her how I had sixth period with Edward, and my run in with Mike. She laughed at his cheesy lines. "He's a sweet kid. The popular crowd treats him and his friends like crap," she said. "He said hi to Tanya one time and she yelled at him."

I scowled at the thought of Tanya. "What does Edward see in her, Alice?"

"Honestly I don't know. Lots of girls liked him our freshman year and they got together sophomore year. I've never seen him with anyone else since. That's why I said he's taken."

"Are they like all lovey-dovey and making out everywhere?" Please say no.

Alice thought for a moment. "Huh. I don't think I've seen them together that way. They go to school events, like dances and stuff, but they don't really touch. Maybe they're not into PDA. Anyway, let's change the subject. Did you get your final fitting for your dress yet?"

Ughhh. The dress. For the wedding. Excuse me, THE WEDDING. My sister Rosalie was getting married next week to her college sweetheart. On my birthday. What a bitch. She gets everything, - looks, popularity, guys fawning all over her, and she has to steal my birth date forever. Well, at least until her second marriage. She doesn't exactly have the best track record with guys. The problem with being so unbelievably gorgeous like her is there are so many men to choose from. I give it five years.

"Bella, are you still pissy about the whole birthday thing?' asked Alice.

"A little. I think she did it on purpose."

"You know that was the only date she could get that hotel while Emmett was on vacation."

"Yeah, whatever, " I rolled my eyes.

"I still can't believe how they got engaged. It was like a fairytale," sighed Alice.

"Nightmare for me, more like it," I grumbled. How does anyone compete with someone like Rosalie? First of all, she's blonde, tall, gorgeous, and smart. Now she has the perfect soon-to-be-husband. And the proposal-unbelievable.

_January 1, 2009._

_There are nine seconds to go. The Huskies are down by four points in the fourth quarter. The quarterback goes back to pass. He fires the ball into the end zone hoping for a miracle. McCarty grabs the ball out of a crowd of players and he scores. "McCarty has won the Rose Bowl for the Huskies!" the announcer screams. "I can't believe it!" The game was over, everyone is screaming._

_Then Emmett, still holding the game-winning ball, runs to the sidelines where Rosalie is jumping up and down in her cheerleading uniform. He gets down on one knee and says into the microphone (of course every camera crew in the stadium was following him) "Rose, you are my best friend, and the love of my life, I can't think of a better place for this than the Rose Bowl to ask you, will you marry me?" Then the effing Husky mascot hands Emmett the ring, and Rose screams, "Yes!" And the crowd goes wild._

I know the whole thing by heart because my parents watch that crap all of the time, because it's Tivoed_. _I know, un-freaking-believable, right? I mean how do you compete with that shit? The whole world revolves around Rose. That's why we moved to Forks, to be closer to her while she finished college and planned the wedding. She and Emmitt were going to continue to live in Seattle after the wedding. He had been drafted by the Seahawks and would be playing football professionally. I swear I'm not making this up.

So, after a few months of job hunting, my mom and dad found jobs in Forks. My dad Charlie is Chief of Police, and my mom Renee found a job as a teacher at the elementary school. Forks isn't super close to Seattle, but it was a hell of a lot closer than Arizona. And my parents made a bundle of money selling their house, so we actually came out ahead in the deal. We moved here in June, I met Alice, and that's where I arrive at the present. A week away from my birthday and my sister's wedding.

"Bella? Do you want me to take you the dressmakers for your fitting? I have to go to the mall anyway to get my dress," Alice brought me back to reality. "The wedding is going to be so much fun. I can't wait to shop in Seattle."

"Yeah, it's going to be great," I grumbled.

"Don't be such a party pooper. You are the Maid of Honor, you know. Put on a happy face," scolded Alice.

I gave her a half-hearted, fake grin. "Happy?"

Alice laughed. "It won't be that bad. Didn't Rosalie tell you that Emmett has a really hot brother? Maybe you can hook up with him at the wedding. And maybe he'll bring some cute friends."

"And maybe I'll be homecoming queen and get a perfect boyfriend, too," I snapped sarcastically.

Alice paused, "Hmm. I'd say the odds of that are pretty good. I can feel it."

"Whatever, Miss Psychic Hotline. Let's go to the mall."


	4. Ch 4 Love Is a Battlefield

**A/N**

**If you haven't seen Pretty in Pink or Sixteen Candles, what the heck is wrong with you? Go now and rent them. Oh, and thank you for reading my silly story.**

**I own nothing except a Jake Ryan t-shirt and the DVD.**

**Chapter 4 Love Is a Battlefield**

"Bella! Did you hear the news?" Alice squealed. "The Back to School dance is going to have an 80s theme!"

"Really? That's like totally awesome," I said sarcastically.

"Come on Bella, you know you love the 80s."

"Yes, I love the 80s, but I hate dances. You know that."

"That's just because you were slightly awkward and refused to conform to traditional styles of dress."

"Ha! I was a huge geek with no friends and a balance problem. But thanks for sugar-coating it, Alice."

"Anyways, we sooo have to go. I've been thinking about possible wardrobe choices. How do you feel about Madonna?"

"Old, weird English accent, freakish muscles…"

"Shut up, ass! I meant as a costume," Alice rolled her eyes. "You're right, it's too cliché. Oooh, I'm thinking Flashdance, maybe Molly Ringwald in Pretty in Pink."

"I love that movie. But you know that her prom dress was hideous. Keep thinking Alice."

"You know you want to find a Duckie of your own, " teased Alice.

"I already have a Duckie. You've seen Mike following me around. I want a Jake Ryan from Sixteen Candles." Mmmm, Jake Ryan. Wait, he kind of looks like…. Nah. Edward is prettier. "You know, I bet my mom has a whole bunch of her old outfits in the garage. She was a total 80s fashionista."

"That's a great idea. Hey Bella, what is up with you and Mikey? You know dating a sophomore would be social suicide."

"We're just friends, Alice. I know what it's like to be a geek. Besides, you know I don't date."

"You don't date because you won't talk to boys."

"Leave it alone, Alice. Come on, we'll be late for first period." There's only one boy I'd like to date, and he is taken.

**EPOV**

"So, Ed, have you thought of a costume for the dance, yet?" asked Jasper.

"What the hell, Jasper? Am I a girl or something? You can be in charge of my outfit, sweetheart," I snapped at him.

"Relax, dude. I guess Tanya will pick out something for you guys, huh?"

"Crap. I need to take care of that. Hey, Jasper, what do you think about Bella Swan?"

"Huh? Why are you asking?" Jasper looked at me curiously. "She's pretty hot, but I don't need to be set up."

"Not for you, ass, for me. I can't stop thinking about her. I catch her looking at me all of the time in class. She looks at me like she's in love with me. I . . . I . . . want to be with her," I stuttered. What the hell, I am a girl.

"What about Tanya? Are you going to break up with her? You've been with her for over two years, and you've known Bella for four days. Do you even talk to Bella?" asked Jasper.

"Well, once when she was on my lap."

"What?" Jasper looked right at me.

"She tripped. Seriously. Jasper I want to tell you everything, but I have to take care of this Tanya thing first."

"So Tanya is a thing now?" Jasper laughed. "Would part of this thing have to do with a certain smokin' hot brunette?"

"Yeah, who also has a smokin' hot petite friend," I smirked knowingly and Jasper looked away. I laughed. "Don't act like you don't want to date Alice. Just like I'm not going to pretend about Bella. Did something happen between you guys?"

"I'll tell you when you tell me what's up with Tanya."

"Fair enough. Let's go to class."

The rest of day I thought about Bella-her smile, her eyes, her blush. I thought about the huge difference between her and Tanya. Ugh. Warm vs. cold. Real vs. plastic. Why did I ever get myself into this charade? Right. Because I don't like to deal with others. I am a coward.

**Two years ago.**

_"Jessica, do you mind not hanging all over me?" I asked, exasperated with her constant pawing. Christ was that girl an octopus?_

_"Aww, come on Eddie-poo. I promise to be very naughty…"_

_"You know he doesn't want to touch those fake boobs, Jessica," Lauren snapped. "He wants the real thing." She was purring like a cat in my ear. I threw up a little in my mouth. Gross, I thought. Can't these girls get the hint that I just want to be left alone?_

_"Leave Edward alone, Jessica and Lauren. He's mine," said Tanya with authority. "We're dating."_

_I looked gratefully at Tanya. "Come on, Edward," she said._

And so it started. We actually did date for a while, and then we both realized there was really no spark between us. But we didn't break up. I liked the fact that I could have a date when I wanted and no other girls would paw me. I could study in peace. She kept them all away from me.

In return, she had me as her "boyfriend", and the popularity it brought her. I knew she didn't like me anymore; in fact, she had someone on the side. I can't blame her, I wasn't giving her any. She had to get it somewhere. But both of us kept up appearances for over a year. This whole farce was actually perfect for both of us during that time. But this year Tanya was unbearable. She had let her popularity go to her head. And now I realized I wanted Bella. I had to break up with her.

"Tanya, can I take you home today? We need to talk." I said at the lunch table.

"Oh, I have to give you your costume for the dance. Good idea. My parents won't be home… Eddie," Tanya purred at me. God, I have to get this over with.

"Lucky Tanya," Jessica muttered.

"Jealous much, Jess? You know Eddie only has eyes for me," Tanya said with her trademark fake sweetness.

Jasper choked out a laugh. I elbowed him in the ribs and gave him a dirty look. "Yeah, he can't stop thinking about you, Tanya," Jasper nearly lost it. Tanya glared at him.

"Don't you have a midget to stare at, Whitlock?" she nodded in Alice's direction.

Oh shit, Jasper's gonna freak.

"F-off, trannie. Jealous because you have to shop in the big and tall store?" Jasper had a point, she had huge feet, and was like 5 foot 10.

Thankfully the bell rang for fifth period before there was bloodshed. "So, I'll meet you by my car," I said. Suddenly, she grabbed me and planted a wet kiss on my mouth before everyone started walking away. They started whistling and yelling, "Get a room!"

"What the fuck?" I hissed in her ear. "Knock that shit off." I glanced hurriedly in Bella's direction. Damn, she saw. Her eyes looked sad, then she looked down as she went to class.

"Oh, hell no, Edward. You were not just checking out the new girl," Tanya said in my ear, still holding me in a death grip to her.

"Why the hell do you care? You know this is all for show and I know you have a guy on the side," I pushed her arms off me.

"But no one else does, and you better not ruin my reputation, Eddie."

"When did you turn into such a bitch, Tanya? You used to be cool. You know, forget after school. We're done Tanya. I can't pretend to like you anymore. Not even for two more periods."

"You can't break up with me, Edward," she screeched. "My parents won't let me go out with my real boyfriend. You are my cover, and I'll be damned if you end up with the new girl. You're going to ruin the dance, and homecoming, and prom!"

"I don't give a shit, anymore. I'm tired of playing games. I want someone who is real, and likes me for me. Good luck with your old ass loser boyfriend."

"We're not through, Cullen. You'll see."

"Um, I think we are. Bye, Tanya. It's been real." I walked away with a smile.

Yes. I'm free. And the next two periods are with Bella. The best part of my day here I come. I practically skipped to class. She was sitting and talking with Alice when I finally got there. I flashed her a huge smile and winked at her. She made a face and looked away. Way to go, Cullen. You haven't even really talked to her and now you're winking and grinning like an idiot. I decided to text Jasper.

_I did it. Broke up w/T. Free 4 Bella. Hook u up w/Alice?_

_Not wasting time E?_

_Nope. U shouldn't either. Meet me afterschool. Full story._

I walked to PE following Bella. Yeah so I was checking her out. It's a nice view. I caught up to her to start a conversation. "Hi, I'm Edward Cullen. We have a few classes together and I wanted to introduce myself. Um, how do you like the weather here in Forks?" What a loser I am. She makes me lose coherent thought.

"You're talking to me about the weather?" she asked with a strange expression.

"Yeah, I guess I am," I laughed.

"Well, I don't like the rain much," she scrunched up her face. It was adorable.

"Then you're in the wrong state," I chuckled.

"I moved to make my family happy."

"What happened?"

"Why are you suddenly talking to me, Edward?" she sounded confused.

"I don't want to stay away from you anymore, Bella."

**BPOV**

Ugh. I saw them kissing. Until then I was pretending she didn't exist. But now I know that it's for real. I feel like I got punched in the stomach. Get over it, Swan.

"I tried to tell you, Bella. I'm sorry," said Alice as we walked to class.

"I know. It's not like he even knows I exist," I sighed.

"Anyways, I have a great idea. Let's watch your mom's 80s movies and we can get some ideas for the dance Saturday!" Alice bounced excitedly. We found our seats.

Edward walked into class late. Great, they must have been making out for a long time. He looks really happy. Wait, he just smiled at me and winked. What's that about?

"Alice, did you see that?"

"Umm, yeah. What the hell? That looked like his panty-dropping smile, Bella."

"No way, he's just all excited from his make out session with Tanya."

"Whatever." She made a "W" with her fingers. "You are in denial. Remember when I said he's taken? I may have to change my mind."

I walked out of class as soon as the bell rang. I felt like someone was following me, then suddenly Edward was next to me talking.

"Hi, I'm Edward Cullen. We have a few classes together and I wanted to introduce myself. How do you like the weather here in Forks?" I stared at his beautiful face for a second, not believing he was starting a conversation.

"You're talking to me about the weather?" I asked dubiously.

"Yeah, I guess I am," he laughed. It sounded musical.

"Well, I don't like the rain much." That's an understatement. Way to make with the witty repartee, Swan.

"Then you're in the wrong state," he chuckled and I shivered.

"I moved to make my family happy," I stated truthfully.

"What happened?" Wow, he actually sounded interested.

"Why are you suddenly talking to me, Edward?" I blurted out.

"I don't want to stay away from you anymore, Bella." He walked away after giving me another heart-stopping smile. I almost did drop my panties.

WTF? Am I in a parallel universe?

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**A/N**

Reviews are love.


	5. Ch 5 Bust a Move

**A/N**

**I do not own the characters. I just stay up all night writing about them.**

Chapter 5 Bust a Move

PE was even worse than usual. I kept thinking about my little encounter with Edward. What the hell did he mean, he didn't want to stay away from me? Does that mean he wants to be near me? Ughh, boys are so confusing.

Mike asked me if I was going to the dance, and I didn't even hear him. "Bella, can you save me a dance? Bella?" Mike called out to me because I was staring across the gym. Edward was in a tank top. Mmm.

"Sorry, Mike. I'm a little preoccupied."

"Yeah, I noticed. Does that have to do with Cullen? I saw you talking to him before class. Are you guys together?"

"What? Be serious, Mike. Why would you say that?"

"I saw the way he was looking at you. And you are always staring at him," Mike said sadly.

"Come on Mike, he was just introducing himself because we have some classes together. He would never be interested in me."

"As much as I wish that were true, I know that look. Half the guys at this school look at you like that, including me."

"Oh, Mike. You know we're friends, right?" I sighed. I didn't want to hurt his feelings.

"I know, Bella. I'm not complaining. My friends are jealous that I even talk to you. You are really doing wonders for my rep. So, about that dance. . ."

"Of course I'll dance with you, but I have to warn you.. "

"I know, two left feet. You're not that uncoordinated. You just have some self-esteem issues. Get over it, like you told me to do."

"How did you get so smart for a sophomore?" I asked laughing.

"Well, I do have an IQ of 149," he said matter of factly.

I couldn't wait to discuss this new Edward development with Alice. After the infamous 5th period look and the walk to class, my mind was a mess. I walked quickly to the parking lot after PE.

"What? Something happened, I can tell by your face," Alice looked at me waiting for an explanation. Damn, that girl knows me too well.

"He walked me to class. He said he didn't want to stay away from me anymore."

"What! Tell me everything. Word for word," she commanded.

I explained what Edward said as we drove home. I also told her about what Mike said during PE. "Edward can't be interested, can he, Alice? What about Tanya?"

"I'm rethinking my whole opinion on this, Bella. These events are unprecedented. No one has broken through the Cullen barrier in two years. And please, she-who-shall-not-be-named is no competition. I'm sorry I made you feel weird when you asked me about her. We both are going to get what we want. I think we need a new strategy for the dance. And starting tomorrow, Hot Bella will be in full effect." Alice was in deep thought.

I could see she was planning a full night of strategizing. I actually was looking forward to it. It couldn't hurt, right?

EPOV

I fairly skipped to my car afterschool. I was free from Tanya, and I talked to Bella. I almost told her how much I liked her.

"Hey Ed, why are you grinning like a fool? Aren't you supposed to be crying over your breakup?" Jasper wisecracked as he climbed into my Volvo.

"Yes. Please hold me, Jazz. Make it better."

"Dick. Seriously, you promised me some answers. Tell me about Tanya."

I told Jasper everything, including my conversation with Bella.

"So, Tanya was your beard?"

"Yeah, but I'm not gay."

"You lonely fuck. You pretended to have a girlfriend so you would be left alone?" Jasper was incredulous.

"I…yeah," I muttered. I know it sounded ridiculous.

"And now you want to hook up with Bella."

"I don't want to hook up, I want a relationship with her. Now, it's your turn to explain about Alice. I know you like her, so spill it."

Jasper told me about the mistake he made, thinking Alice was a guy. I sat in disbelief for the whole story.

"Dude, you really screwed up."

"No shit, Sherlock. Tell me how to fix it."

"Well, you haven't done anything to try. How about you man up and apologize? All you do is stare at her when she isn't looking," I explained.

"You're right. I've been a total pussy," he admitted.

"We both have, Jazz. But we know that now, and we can still do something about it."

"What do I do? Say, 'Hey Alice, sorry I called you a dude. I have fantasies about you, be my girlfriend.'"

"I have an idea. You talk to Alice about getting Bella and me together, and I talk to her about you and Alice. That gives us lots of excuses to talk to them."

"That's good, Edward. It could work," Jasper said with a smile.

Alice and I looked through my mother's 80s clothes she had stored in the garage. "Your mom had some good taste in clothes, Bella. These outfits aren't as hideous as I though they would be. Oh my God. You have to wear this for the dance. It will be perfect!" she squealed while holding up a plaid skirt. "And look at these boots!"

"Check this out, Alice. It would be great for you." I held up a tiny black dress.

"Oh, it's perfect. I know exactly what accessories to wear. I can't wait for Saturday!" She said excitedly. "Come on, let's go watch the movies and try on the outfits."

After watching _Pretty in Pink, The Breakfast Club_, and _Dirty Dancing,_ we had OD'd on the 80s. My mom had dropped in occasionally to comment on her favorite scenes and help us perfect our 80s looks. "Oh, I love when Duckie sings in the record store!" my mother gushed. "Why don't they have record stores anymore?"

Alice and I laughed at my mother's comments, and proceded to practice our 80s dance moves. She also helped me find an outfit for school that would 'accentuate my assets' as she put it. I called it 'flaunting my ass.' What the hell, I'd been doing things my way for sixteen years and I haven't even had a date. I let Alice do her magic.

The next day Alice and I were dressed to kill and feeling pretty confident. She hadn't said anything about going after Jasper, but I knew that's what she really wanted. I had no idea on how to approach Edward, so I decided to just go for it. During first period Alice and I talked about our outfits and what we thought other people would wear to the dance.

"I think we should make a bet on how many girls will come dressed like Madonna," joked Alice.

"Definitely at least eight Madonna wannabees, and five Michael Jacksons."

"What do you think Edward and Jasper will wear?" Alice sighed.

"What if one of them showed up dressed like Tom Cruise in _Risky Business_?" Swoon. Button-down shirt and underwear. Hot. I loved 80s Tom Cruise, now, not so much.

"No more, Bella. I won't be able to concentrate," whined Alice. "Now remember, just be confident when you see Edward in class. Don't go overboard with the flirting."

Overboard? I had no idea what to do!

When the bell rang to go to second period, I got butterflies in my stomach. It was time to see Edward. You can do it, I told myself. I walked carefully, so I wouldn't trip. That would be really attractive. God, I hope Tyler leaves me alone.

Edward wasn't in class yet, so I released the breath I was holding. Whoosh. Calm down, Swan. You don't even know him very well. You basically stare at him, listen to him talk during class, and have PG-13 dreams about him (I don't know enough to make them rated R). I decided that I needed to write something about Edward to calm me down and also to prove to myself I wasn't delusional. I made a list of the things I like about him.

Why I Like Edward

1. Super hot -OK that's pretty shallow.

2. Green eyes -I want to see them close up. Like right before he kisses me.

3. Intelligent -Big turn on. He always has the right answer.

4. Loves to read -That really should be number one. He always has a book during lunch. I almost jumped him when I saw him reading _Pride and Prejudice._

5. His voice - Gah. It's like velvet and sex (well, what I think it's like)

6. Doesn't act like the typical guy. -He's thoughtful, polite, and well-read.

7. His body -Seriously, he's like an Abercrombie model.

8. His smell -It's like vanilla and soap and all delicious. I hope he hasn't noticed me sniffing him.

9. He's perfect. -Except he's taken. Sob.

"What are you working on, Bella?" Crap, I know that voice-velvet and sex. I shoved the paper into my pocket as quickly as possible, hoping he hadn't seen anything.

"Um, just a shopping list. There are some things I want to get. I um, really need them, badly," I giggled nervously as I looked up at his perfect face. Super cool flirting there, Bells.

"I was wondering if I could talk to you about Alice," he asked. _Wait, what?_

"Sure. What do you want to know?" I gulped. _This was not going as I hoped_.

"Do you think she has feelings for Jasper?" _YESSSS! I screamed in my head_.

"Are you kidding?" I replied, incredulous.

"Is that a no?" he looked perplexed.

"Edward, Alice has been in love with Jasper since freshman year. You do know the story of how he destroyed her, right?"

"Yeah, that sucked. But Jasper feels awful for what happened. He has never forgiven himself. He's been pining for her for years."

"Wow, so what do you want me to do with this information?" I asked.

"I was thinking that you and I can push them in the right direction. They obviously are crazy about each other, but are scared and embarrassed to do anything. You and I know them best and we can help them see they belong together."

"I have an idea. . . can you get Jasper to wear something special to the dance?" At that moment the teacher cleared his throat so we would stop talking.

"Give me your number," whispered Edward. I gave it to him, silently cheering in my head, and he texted me instantly,

_What should he wear?_

I texted him back with my idea. He seemed to think he could get Jasper to go along with it. During class we gave each other flirty looks, well I was going for flirting, but Edward probably thought I was constipated. We talked while he walked me to my next class. Tanya, who? Suck it, amazon. We continued to text the rest of the morning. It was effortless to talk to him this way. He was funny and interesting. Hmm, I should put that on my list. I reached into my pocket for it, but it wasn't there. I looked frantically in my purse, my backpack, and folder. No list. NOOOOO! Wait, my name wasn't on it, no one will know that I wrote it. I'd shit twice and die if Edward found out.

At lunch, I noticed that he wasn't sitting with Tanya and the others, only Jasper. She kept shooting him dirty looks, yay, maybe they got into a fight. I saw him wink at me. The plan must be going well. He and Jasper kept looking over at our table.

"Alice, tell me what happened with Jasper today."

"Nothing. I didn't even see him until now."

"I talked to Edward," I could hardly contain my excitement.

"What! Spill, Swan," Alice demanded.

"We talked about lots of things, and he asked for my phone number. We've been texting all morning."

"Bellllaaa! I'm so happy for you!" Alice beamed.

"He also said that Jasper was interested in you, but too embarrassed to make a move."

"Oh. My. God!"

**EPOV**

Wow, did she get better looking overnight? She was sitting there, lost in thought, scribbling furiously on a sheet of paper. I walked over to her quietly, trying not to disturb her. I asked her what she was doing. She looked surprised to see me, and shoved the paper in her pocket. She said she was making a list of things she really wanted.

I told her my idea about Jasper and Alice, and she seemed eager to help me. She really cares about her friend. That made her even more attractive to me. When the teacher made us stop talking, I asked for her phone number so I could continue our conversation. When she pulled her phone out of her pocket, the paper she was writing on fell out. I saw that she didn't notice it, so I covered it with my foot, and picked it up. I slipped it into my pocket to read later.

I walked her to her next class, completely awed by how smart and funny she was. Every minute I spent with her, I liked her more and more. I was past the point of just interested. I had to do something to make her mine.

As soon as I was out of her sight, I took out her list. Holy crap! What she 'wanted to get badly' was me! She made a list of what she thought were my best qualities. I was feeling pretty awesome until the last item on the list. She still thought I was with Tanya. Damn.

We texted all morning. Her idea for Jasper's outfit for tomorrow was brilliant. He was already thinking about something similar anyway. She also gave me an idea for my clothes as well, though she didn't know it. I didn't mention my feelings to her, but I could feel us getting closer through our conversation.

At lunch, I sat with Jasper. I didn't want to sit with Tanya and her crowd ever again. She sure looked pissed. I really wanted to sit with Bella, but I had to get Jasper settled with Alice first. I couldn't help looking at her, and I winked when she caught me staring.

"You seem pretty happy, there Eddie boy. Did you talk to anybody special today?" Jasper teased.

"Yeah wuss, unlike you. I got her number and we've been talking all day. I also put in a good word for you. Apparently Alice does like your sad ass. She's just scared you're going to reject her again."

"I would never do that. I adore her. God, Edward, I totally screwed myself all these years."

"Trust me, dude, I know what you are talking about." I told him what Bella suggested he wear to the dance, and some tips to talk to Alice. Lunch went by quickly, which was good because my next class was with Alice and Bella. I decided to sit with them again. We talked the whole period. I hoped Jasper could get his head out of his ass long enough to get Alice to forgive him. I realized it would be really fun to go out on dates with Bella and our friends. I never had that type of relationship before. Actually, I really hadn't had a real relationship, ever.

When class ended, Alice walked in the other direction, and Bella and I walked together to PE. I decided it was a good time to make my move.

"Bella. I really want to spend more time with you. Do you think we could go out sometime?" I asked nervously.

"Edward, don't you have a girlfriend? I don't date cheaters. You need to break up with her before you ask me out," she said, looking me straight in the eye.

"Good news. I already did."

**A/N**

**Review, please. **


	6. Ch 6 All I Want Is You

**A/N**

**I don't own the characters, but I read crazy stories about them on my iPhone.**

**Chapter 6-All I Want Is you**

Wait, am I dreaming? Did Edward just ask me out? No, not possible. Did he say he broke up with Tanya?

"Huh?" I blinked as I tried to snap out of my stupor.

"Will you go out with me?" asked Edward with a crooked smile. "I promise that I am not a cheater."

"Um, yeah. I would like that." I responded shyly. That's an understatement. I think I see rainbows and stars and sunshine all at once. My insides are about to burst.

"How about tonight?" Yes! Wait, crap, no.

"I can't tonight. My grandparents are coming from Arizona and I have to visit with them," I said sadly. I saw a flash of disappointment in his eyes.

"Tomorrow?" he questioned.

"That's the dance. I promised Alice I would go with her. I can't ditch her. But maybe you can dance with me?" I asked hopefully. Would he bother to wait for me, or would he ask someone else? "I understand if you want to get a date for tomorrow," I said with despair in my voice. Please, please don't get another date.

"Bella, I'm not going to ask anyone else. I want to go with you. See you tomorrow." He walked into the gym and I had to pause to get control of myself. My heart was beating wildly and I had trouble breathing. I definitely needed to write every moment of this in my journal so I would remember this always. I walked into gym in a trance.

Poor Mike had to play badminton by himself because I was in Edward Cullen dreamland. I stared at Edward like an idiot for most of the period, until he smirked at me. Busted. Yeah, well, it was his fault for being so hot and sweaty and perfect.

"Don't forget about our dance tomorrow. The guys didn't believe me when I told them you would dance with me. They think you are like all of the other popular girls. I told them that you are different," Mike said proudly.

"Sure, Mike. I promised."

"You're not sick, are you? You seem kind of out of it," he said with concern in his voice.

"I'm fine, just distracted," I replied as I stared at Edward doing layups. "See you tomorrow."

The bell rang and I practically ran to change so I could tell Alice about my date.

"Oh my god, what happened? You look like you just met Robert Pattinson and he asked you to be his baby momma!" Alice squealed as we got in her car.

"Better." I could hardly contain myself.

"Not possible. There's no one as hot as Rob-"

"Edward asked me out and he said he broke up with Tanya!" I blurted out in one swift breath.

"You. Are. Shitting. Me." Alice looked stunned.

"I swear. I couldn't believe it either. He asked me out for tonight, but my grandparents are coming. And tomorrow is the dance, so we haven't set up a date yet."

"Why aren't you guys going to the dance together?"

"You know you are my date, Alice," I said with conviction and she smiled back at me. "Now tell me what happened during sixth with Jasper."

She sighed. "I totally screwed up. He said hi to me and I gave him a dirty look."

"Oh, Alice."

"Yeah, I know. I just had a flashback to freshman year and I freaked out."

"I told you what Edward said. Jasper likes you."

"Yeah, I know. It's just hard to believe it. It's been three years of misery. Bella, I'm so glad you are my best friend. Things have changed for me so quickly since you got here."

"For me too, Alice." She dropped me off at home with a promise to return early tomorrow to get ready for the dance.

"Isabella Marie! Look at you! You've gotten so big. You look like a little lady," my grandmother exclaimed as I walked in the house. They were dressed in their Arizona retirement finest. Polyester stretch pants, orthopedic shoes, and sweaters with little characters all over. Wow, getting old sucks. I hope my mom and dad won't dress like that.

"Hi, Grandma, hi Grandpa. It's good to see you." I hugged both of them hello.

"We're looking forward to a nice long visit with you sweetheart," my grandmother cooed, and my grandpa nodded at me.

"Hi Bells." My grandpa was a man of few words. Just like my dad. No complaints, here.

"Granmare and granpere who ez zis?" A young man grabbed my hand and kissed it. He was tall and looked like he should be on the cover of GQ. He had dirty blond hair, blue eyes, and a rockin' body. It was hard not to notice as he was wearing a wife beater and skintight jeans. Christ, he was huge-well, you know where. Daammmn. So hot. Must look away.

"This is our granddaughter, Isabella. Isabella, this is James Laurent. He is an exchange student who is living with us for this year. He's from France, dear. He's going to attend U of A," my grandmother explained. "He's about your age, Isabella. Maybe you can show him around tonight and help him make friends."

"Aren't we supposed to go to dinner tonight, Grandma?"

"We're too tired from our trip, sweetheart. Why don't you take James to see the sights?"

James looked at me and winked. "Eet wood be my plezure to meet zure friends." He looked like he checking me out.

I coughed and sputtered. "Yeah, sure." I ran into my room to call Alice.

"Alice! It's an emergency. Totally hot Euro stud at my house. I was temporarily blinded by his 'Le Dong,' but I think he wants me. I need backup."

"I'm on it. Be there in a minute." Thank god she lives next door.

About five minutes later she walked in my room, laughing. "Oh that James is a charmer. Come on, we're going shopping."

"What? Wait. I don't think it's a good idea to go somewhere with a hot guy. What if he tries something? He totally kissed my hand and winked at me."

"Bella, he was looking at your outfit. He just wants to go shopping. He likes designers. He's completely fabulous. Don't you have any 'gaydar' at all?" She laughed at me. "Suddenly you are Miss Popular since Edward Cullen asked you out?"

"Oh, crap. I'm an idiot."

"Come on, let's show 'Le Donger' all the hot spots in Port Angeles."

James was fabulous. I loved listening to his accent, and he was a great shopping partner. Alice absolutely adored him, and he helped us pick several hot outfits for our dates (hopefully) with our dream guys. Alice was practically drooling as he described the newest Paris fashion trends over dinner. We had decided to eat at a diner in the mall to get 'American' food.

"I'll be back. I've gotta pee," Alice hurried to the restroom. James and I continued to talk about guys. I told him about how hot Edward was, and I laughed as he said he was going to steal him away.

EPOV

"Come on Jasper, I'm hungry. Let's get a table." We approached the diner and as I looked through the window, I noticed a beautiful, laughing brunette. Bella. My heart soared at the sight of her, then it crashed into my chest. She wasn't alone. She was sitting with some blond guy. They were laughing and talking. She was on a date. She lied to me. Grandparents my ass! I turned and walked away with Jasper following behind me.

**A/N**

**Them silly kids and their misunderstandings! **

**Please review, I love to hear from you.**


	7. Ch 7 The Way You Make Me Feel

**I don't own Twilight or Sixteen Candles, just a ridiculous crush on a fictional character. Ok, two fictional characters.**

**Chapter 7**

**The Way You Make Me Feel**

**JasPOV**

"Hey Edward, wait. What's going on?" I grabbed his arm to stop him. "I'm hungry, dude."

"Bella's on a date with some guy in there." Wow, he looked crushed. I turned around to see what he was talking about.

"Look. Do you see her and that blonde asshole?"

"Yeah. And I also see Alice. He's probably just her friend. Why don't you go in there and see what's up?" I pressed. God, Alice looks beautiful.

"I didn't see Alice." He looked through the window. "Well, she wasn't there before. But Bella still said she couldn't go out with me because she was visiting her grandparents tonight. That dude is definitely not her grandpa."

I laughed. "You're right about that, but don't over react. You of all people should know not to jump to conclusions. Remember Tanya? Besides, I don't think that's her date, actually I think that guy is into dudes. Look how he's acting with two smoking hot girls." Blondie seemed to be flirting with the waiter.

We stared at their interactions for a few moments. He got the waiter's number. Yeah, he's totally gay. I called it. I smiled smugly at Edward.

"Ok, maybe he's gay. You know you don't have the greatest judgment about these sorts of things. Remember the 'Alice is a guy' debacle?" Edward retorted.

"Screw you, Cullen. Don't bring that crap up. Anyway, you can stay out here and get all emo about Bella, and I'm going to eat." _You better not screw up my chance with Alice_, I thought to myself as we trudged off.

**EPOV**

I was really confused when I saw her with that blond fucker. I did feel better when I realized Alice was there, but I still had a crushing pain in my chest. It couldn't be a date, could it? What Jasper said did make sense, but everything was happening so fast. One day I had a pretend girlfriend, the next day I was asking out my dream girl. I didn't realize how lonely I was until I met Bella.

We walked towards the food court, then I felt a hand near my… "What the fuck, Jasper?" I snapped out of my stupor when I noticed Jasper grabbing my phone out of my pocket. "Christ, I think you touched my junk." He was furiously texting someone. "Who are you texting?"

"Bella," he said with a cocky grin. I yanked the phone from his hand, but he had already sent the message.

_What r u doing? How r ur grandparents? –E_

"What the hell did you do?"

The phone buzzed right away. I braced myself for the worst.

_Change of plans. Shopping n eating w/Alice n family friend. Can't wait 2 see u 2morrow-B_

I breathed a sigh of relief. She wasn't lying. I showed the message to Jasper and he gave me the 'I told you so' look. Smug bastard. Wait until he's bitching about girl troubles.

"Come on," he said. "I need to get something else to wear for the dance before the mall closes." Freaking Jasper was always so worried about his clothes. And he calls me emo.

**BPOV**

"_Girls just wanna have fuuunnnn, they just wanna…"_

"You better have a good reason for waking me up at 6:30 on Saturday morning, Alice," I growled into the phone. "And when did you change my ring tone?"

"Frankie says relax, grouch." God, she was so into the 80s. "We have a lot to do before tonight." Was she kidding me?

"Alice, it is not going to take twelve hours for me to get ready. Even I will admit I am not that hideous."

"It's not just to get dressed, Bella. We have to watch more 80s movies and listen to music and get in the mood," she explained matter of factly.

"Call me back at 10:00, not a minute earlier, and you've got a deal."

"Fine, but we are sooo watching _Can't Buy Me Love_ and _Valley Girl_ and you _will_ let me have full wardrobe control."

"Fine." No problem there, young Patrick Dempsey and Nicolas Cage, you know before they got old and weird. I drifted back to my dream of Edward nibbling on my . . .

I awoke at exactly 10:01 when Alice entered my room with a suitcase and a duffle bag. "Remember, Bella, you agreed," she said as I groaned and crawled out of bed. She attacked me with the crimping iron as I put in the DVD.

"At least let me take a shower," I grumbled as I dodged her groping hands.

"Fine. But only so you won't smell like ass."

"Uhl. You're gross." I took a shower and returned for my 80s makeover.

We had so much fun laughing at the bad 80s fashions and listening to our favorite songs, the time passed by quickly.

"Where's James?" asked Alice. "I thought he was going with us."

"He is visiting a 'friend' he met at the mall," I laughed. "He'll be back in time."

"Bella, Alice, we're leaving. Have a great time at the dance, girls. Make sure you take a lot of pictures," my mom called out to us on her way out. She and Charlie were driving to Seattle to meet Emmett's parents. They were going to discuss last minute wedding plans. Sigh, the wedding was in one week.

"Bye, Mom, Dad. Have fun with the McCartys," I waved to them as they were driving away.

"That's not their last name, they're the Cu….." but I didn't hear the rest. I slammed the door. Whatever. They were my sister' s problem.

**EPOV**

My phone buzzed in my pocket.

"Ed-O."

"Hey, Em. It's good to hear from you. What's up?"

"You are so going to love me. I got the fake IDs for you and Jasper."

"Sweet. I didn't know what we were going to do for your bachelor party."

"No shit. I had to have my best man there. Whatcha got planned? Nothing too scandalous, cuz I got a rep to maintain."

"There's nothing that I could plan that could be worse than what you've already done, Emmett," I laughed.

"Shut it, I'm going to be a married man. All I need is my girl. And speaking of girls, Rosie's got a sister. She's not totally heinous, although I only met her once-the last time I went to Arizona. Maybe her hair grew out and you two could hook up at the wedding."

"Forget it. I can get my own girls." Like I want a bald chick that was "partially" heinous instead of Bella. Right.

"Are you sure, because you've never gotten any, if you know what I mean."

"By choice, Emmett."

"Whatever. Think about it. I'll see you Friday."

"Good luck for the game on Monday. I'll be watching. Later, bro."

I got dressed for the dance in the clothes I borrowed from my dad. Before she left, my mom swore that the outfit looked "totally 80s." She said my dad was a "total babe" in that jacket. Her words, not mine. She got all dreamy looking and ignored me after that, so I'll assume she was fantasizing about my dad. Uh, gross. But I guess looking like my dad was a good thing, since most women swooned when they saw him. I know my mom still did.

When I finished dressing, I drove to Jasper's house. I laughed when I saw him. "You look ready to go on tour, Axel. Where the hell is Slash?"

"Jealous, _Dickward?_ Maybe Bella will fall for me when she sees me." Jasper taunted me and I punched him in the arm. "Oww, I was teasing you. For being skinny, you're freakishly strong."

"I'm not skinny, _Assper_. I'm lean. And you concentrate on the difference between boys and girls, genius, before you fuck up again. Do you want me to quiz you?"

"Bite me, _Eddie-poo_."

"Just hurry up,_ Jizz_. I want to see Bella."

"OK, _Maverick_." He mumbled something about me being "touchy" and "scientology."

We drove to the dance with both of us feeling excited about what was to come. I still had reservations about what I saw last night, but I wanted to give Bella a chance to explain.

We arrived at the Forks gym before the girls. The gym was covered in pink and turquoise streamers, balloons, and banners of 80s musical groups. Geez, who decorated this place? Oh right, Jessica and Lauren. That explains the lack of taste.

The DJ was blasting _Just Can't Get Enough, _but when he saw Jasper he cranked up _Welcome to the Jungle_. Jasper started doing his Axel Rose moves, and everyone was cracking up. I saw Tyler dressed like that dude from Miami Vice. Typical douche bag. He better not try to hit on Bella again.

We loitered around the drink table for a bit, waiting for the girls. Jazz was talking to some of his other friends when I felt arms reach around my waist. I smiled and turned around to see the girl I had been waiting for.

**BPOV**

Alice and I finally were on our way. James was going to take my grandparents' car and meet us later. The butterflies in my stomach were moving full throttle, and I couldn't stop fidgeting. "Alice, do you think he's going to talk to me?"

"Are you kidding? You look hot. He won't be able to stay away. The problem is going to be keeping other guys away."

"Get real, Alice."

"We're here!" Alice squealed. "Look confident, and work that plaid mini."

We walked into the gym with our faces flushed with excitement. Alice was fantastically dressed like a girl from Robert Palmer's video, _Simply Irresistible_. You know the one with the girls in black skin-tight dresses and red lipstick? She had her short dark hair pulled back and she was wearing sky-high heels with my mom's old dress. Sorry, retro dress. Alice would kick my ass if she heard me say she was wearing an old dress. Jasper wasn't going to know what hit him.

Alice had outdone herself with my outfit. She had sewn my mom's old plaid skirt and cut up her Clash t-shirt to make me a punk rock groupie. My shirt was held together by safety pins, so I couldn't inhale too deeply, or I might pop out of my top. I was rocking my mom's knee high Doc Martens-those boots kick ass-but still showing plenty of skin. The only thing that didn't look punk was my hair, because Alice told me punk hair was 'fugly.' So she sprayed some pink streaks into my side-ponytail.

I started feeling pretty good in spite of the crappy decorations. This was my first real dance. "Ooh! Welcome to the Jungle!" exclaimed Alice. "I love Guns 'N Roses."

Then something strange happened. Alice was struck dumb. One minute she was singing and dancing, then nothing. She was standing still like she had been slapped. I looked in the direction she was facing and I saw them. Jasper and Edward. Oh. My. God.

I knew what Jasper was going to wear; I had given Edward a heads up to pass on to Jasper. But damn that boy was hot. He was wearing a skin tight t-shirt and jeans that were so worn out they were held on by a few threads. He had a bandanna tied on his head and sunglasses. He wore a leather cuff and motorcycle boots to make him Alice's ultimate wet dream.

Now that picture was perfect, but Edward-there are no words to describe him. But I'll try 'cuz I'm a people pleaser. He was my fantasy date. I think he read my diary of ultimate hot fantasies. Painted on Levis, white t-shirt stretched across every glorious muscle, boots, leather bomber jacket, and aviator sunglasses. And his beautiful coppery hair was brushed back, well, as much as Edward could control that crazy hair. He was dressed like Tom Cruise in Top Gun. Sluuurp. I had to lick the drool from the corner of my mouth. I've always had a huge crush on 80s Tom, not the crazy scientology Tom.

I was on the verge of running over there and jumping the guy, but then I saw her. Tanya. What the fuck was she wearing? Bad Madonna outfit? Knew it. She was walking over to him.

She wrapped her arms around Edward, and I watched him turn with a smile toward her. I choked back a sob as I ran for the restroom. I knew I shouldn't have trusted him. Liar.

**A/N**

**Reviews are like Rob's eyes.**


	8. Ch 8 Boys Don't Cry

**Chapter 8**

**Boys Don't Cry**

**APOV**

Time stood still. I was in a vacuum where only Jasper and I existed. I knew I had a strong attraction for him, but I didn't realize that he was _it_ for me. No one could make me feel like this. I stood there dumbstruck until I noticed him moving towards me. Do you know those sappy movies where the characters are running towards each other in slow motion? Well, it was like that except there was nothing corny about it. The anticipation burned through every cell in my body. I could taste it.

Suddenly the star of every fantasy of mine for the last four years was holding both of my hands and looking deep into my eyes. No, wait, into my soul. We stood there for moments, hours, I don't know, just communicating with our eyes until Jasper broke the silence.

"Alice, I've been a fool. I'm sorry. How about a d-"

"Stop, Jasper. Let me enjoy this moment." He wrapped his arms around me. "You don't know how long I've waited for you," I whispered to him.

We danced and talked in our own little world for several songs. He told me how sorry he was for what happened between us, and I forgave him. I asked him what changed, and he said, "Edward." He explained how Edward got the courage to get the girl he wanted, and that inspired him to do the same.

"Where are those two lovebirds, by the way?" I wondered.

**EPOV**

"Get your skanky hands off of me, Tanya! Don't you understand what 'over' means? Someone's going to get the wrong idea about us."

"I told you we weren't finished. And by the way, 'someone' went crying into the restroom when she saw us," she gloated.

"You are evil. You did that on purpose to hurt Bella."

"You bet your sweet ass I did. You think Miss Nobody is going to take my place? Over my dead body."

"That's the only way you could tempt me to get near you."

"It's not over Edward," she said as she sauntered away. What a vindictive witch. What the hell was I thinking for the last two years?

I rushed to the bathrooms to find Bella. Crap, I can't just barge in there. Where's Alice to help me? I scanned the crowded dance floor and spotted Alice and Jasper slow dancing. I didn't want to intrude, so I waited outside the restroom. I stood there running my hands through my hair nervously until I saw her walk into the gym. With the blonde guy. His arm around her. SHIT.

I walked over to Bella and the George Michael reject and tried to apologize. "Bella, please listen. I'm so sorry you had to see-" She cut me off.

"Forget it Edward. You don't owe me anything. We are not dating, and she is your girlfriend. Have a good time." And she walked away with that tight-jeaned wearing pretty boy. Could things get any worse?

I leaned against the gym wall trying to figure out what to do. She didn't want to talk and I had no clue how to show her how I felt.

"Edward?' Someone was talking to me. Thank God, Jasper and Alice finally broke out of their trance long enough to see something was up. "You look like someone kicked your puppy," joked Jasper.

I sighed. "Bella saw Tanya molesting me and now she won't talk to me. I tried to explain, but she thinks we're still together. I'm screwed. Then she took off with America's Next Top Male Model. Look at them." I nodded my head in their direction as Bella and that dude were dancing to some Madonna song. Alice was talking to her on the dance floor and she gave me a dirty look.

"Crap. Now Alice is mad at me, too."

"Relax, Ed. I'll talk to Alice. But don't you think you better explain this whole Tanya thing to Bella? I mean all she knows is that you just broke up with her after two years. She doesn't know you didn't have any feelings for Tanya."

"You're right, Jazz. But what do I do? She won't listen to a word I say."

"Two words: _Say Anything. _You need to go all Lloyd Dobler on her ass," explained Jasper.

"You got a trench coat and a boom box handy?" I joked. "Isn't that a little desperate and cliché?"

"Don't be a dick. I mean make a grand gesture. Chicks love that sappy shit. Alice told me Bella loves those 80s romantic comedies. If you want her, don't take no for an answer."

"Right, I can do this. Bella is worth it."

**BPOV**

How did I let myself trust him? Easy. He's beautiful and he charmed the pants off of me. Now I'm in the restroom humiliated. I guess I should have been more careful. He just broke up with that, that, female. Ugh. I shouldn't even be mad, really. I knew it was too good to be true. Maybe he talked to me to get her jealous or something.

I went to get a breath of fresh air, and sucked it up. That is my mantra. Suck it up and deal. Alice was in her circle of heaven and I didn't want to ruin her good time, so I decided to stick it out. Edward Cullen who?

Outside, I found James who was dressed as George Michael in the _Faith_ video. Totally perfect for him. He'll probably find a boyfriend here before me. We decided to drown my sorrows in some punch and dancing. We were 'getting into the grove' when Alice came over to us.

"Have you talked to Edward yet?" she asked.

"No, and it's not going to happen." I explained the situation to her. She turned to give him a dirty look.

" 'e iz a deek," commented James. " 'E doez nut know how to act weeth weman."

"Let me find out what happened," said Alice. "Jazz is talking to him right now."

"Don't bother. So you and Jazz? You looked pretty cozy," I teased.

"Yes, he's perfect," she gushed. "But don't worry about me now."

"Alice, I'm fine. I'm going to dance and have fun, and pretend Edward was never born." Yeah, right. That wasn't happening, but I had to try for Alice's sake. "Go be with Jasper. One of us should be happy. Besides, James is here, and Ben and Angela."

"You are my best friend, Bella. I know things will work out. I can feel it."

I tried to keep up with James as we danced, but that Euro boy toy could move. I made it through "Push It" and "Thriller," but then he found a guy that interested him. They took off in search of a private place. Hmm, I didn't even know that guy was gay. Alice was with Jasper, so I danced with Angela and Ben, who made a really cute couple dressed in preppie clothes. They had matching plaid shorts and Polo shirts and sweaters tied around their necks. Now and then I would glance around to see what Edward was doing. I couldn't help it. He seemed to be alone or with Jasper every time I saw him. I wondered where Tanya was?

Tyler came to cut in, "Bella, you look hot, wanna dance?" What the hell, why not? I don't have any other prospects, right?

"Sure, Tyler." I think that boy watched some old 80s videos, because he launched into a craptastic Kid 'n Play routine. Can you say awkwaard! After that sad display, I decided to take a break.

"Thanks, Tyler, but I'm a little tired."

"Later I'll show you my best moves," he hissed in my ear. Eew, gross. Definitely not. I sat on the bleachers on the side of the gym furthest away from Edward. I watched other people dance and have fun. I admired their fashion choices and laughed at some of the crazy outfits people had on. Boy George, Michael Jackson, Cyndi Lauper. A whole crapload of Madonnas.

I was feeling pretty lonely when I noticed Mike walk in. He grinned widely and walked over to me. "Mike! You made it! Oh you look so adorable." He was dressed like Zach from Saved by the Bell.

"Thanks, Bella. You look beautiful." I blushed. "Are you ready for our dance?"

"Sure," I answered. "Oh, I love this song. Let's go." It was "_Should I Stay or Should I Go_." I knew what the Clash were singing about. I was living that feeling. I wasn't sure if I wanted to leave, or stick around and have to watch Edward and Tanya.

We were dancing and having a good time when Mike asked me, "Bella, do you think we could be more than friends?" He had that look in his eyes-you know admiration, lust, desire. I know I only looked at one person that way, and it wasn't Mike.

"Mike, I'm sorry, but it wouldn't be fair to you."

"You like Cullen," he said dejectedly.

"I can't help it," I blinked back a tear.

"You can't blame a guy for trying. How about some tongue, or maybe your underpants? It'll help me save face with my friends," Mike teased.

"You are going to make some girl very lucky, Mike." I hugged him and went to sit down away from everyone.

**EPOV**

"This better work, Jasper. If I see her dance with one more guy, I'm going to lose it." I had to see her with the blond model, then Tyler, then Mike who was totally into her. She even hugged him. That wasn't even counting the guys staring at her in that outfit-I should kill Alice-pink plaid schoolgirl skirt and scraps of fabric for a top. And the boots, holy crap, I imagined her legs. . . Calm down Cullen, not the right time for that. I wanted to throw my jacket over her to mark her as mine.

"I told Alice the situation, and she agreed that honesty is your best friend. She also said that your idea is perfect," said Jasper. "And you owe me $20, that James guy is totally gay."

"We didn't bet, Jasper."

"So what, you owe me more than that for putting up with your sad act." I playfully punched him. "Seriously, Ed, it's going to work out, I can feel it."

"You're psychic now?" I joked.

"Kiss my ass, Emoward."

I went to talk to the DJ about my special request. He said he wasn't doing dedications. "I just heard you dedicate "_Hungry Like the Wolf"_ to Nessie from Jacob, you liar."

"He paid me $20."

"I'll give you $50, but you better say what I want you to say."

**BPOV**

I walked to the back of the bleachers to be by myself, but I wasn't. I could hear some moaning and whispering. I couldn't help but be nosy and sneak a peak. I walked quietly to the far corner where I heard the sounds. It was some greasy looking guy swallowing some girl's face. She was in some tacky Madonna outfit. OMG, I recognized that ugly skirt. It was freaking Tanya making out with another guy. I tiptoed out of there, although they were pretty oblivious to everything. Poor Edward.

Should I tell him what I saw? I was really hurt by him, but I didn't want him to be hurt, too. I cared for him too much. Maybe they broke up again? But Tanya looked and sounded like she really knew that guy. She kept moaning 'oh baby.' I had to tell him.

I walked out from behind the bleachers to the sounds of "_In Your Eyes"_ by Peter Gabriel. I love that song. When Lloyd held up the boom box playing that song to show how much he loves Diane, I cried. It's so romantic. Maybe I can pry Alice away from Jasper to slow dance with me.

"This song is dedicated to Bella from Edward. He says it's for you and only you," the announcer's voice echoed through the gymnasium. My head snapped up and I looked frantically around the gym for Edward. There. He was standing by himself holding something small over his head. My friends and Jasper were close by, but I only had eyes for Edward. He looked hopefully at me as I almost ran to him. When I got close, I noticed what he was holding. I threw myself into his arms. He staggered a bit at the force of my embrace.

"I didn't have a boom box, so I hoped my iPod would do the trick," he whispered into my hair.

**A/N**

**Those crazy teens!**

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	9. Ch 9 Don't You Want Me

**A/N**

**I don't own the characters; they just dance around in my head to 80s songs.**

Chapter 9 Don't You Want Me

BPOV

MMmmmm. Vanilla. Leather. Hotness. The smell of Edward. . . intoxicating. For a brief second I basked in his warmth and aroma. Then, it hit me. What was I doing? Well, I was hanging on Edward _Freaking_ Cullen like a cheap suit. I had launched myself at him like a scud missile after the most romantic gesture of my almost seventeen years. It was totally perfect-_at that moment_. I was completely blown away at his efforts. But now, after processing what happened, I don't know why he bothered. Why did he have to pick that song? That was a sure-fire way to melt my heart. But he doesn't even know me. He has this uber-girlfriend and I'm just this ridiculous dork in knee-high Docs.

Seriously, we just met a week ago. I don't get it. He must have felt guilty for asking me out and hooking up with Tanya again. That must be it. Did he lie when he said they had broken up a few days ago? Hell if I know. I'm completely in over my head. My life was suddenly a teen romantic comedy.

Boy, was Tanya going to be pissed if she saw our little _Say Anything_ reenactment. Although, she didn't have a right to, considering that five minutes ago she was swapping spit with some other guy. Geez, I almost forgot about that. I was on my way to tell Edward when he surprised me.

His arms squeezed me tightly to his body, and what a body it was, alerting me that I wasn't daydreaming about him. How many dreams have I had about this boy? Countless. Now I was here and I had no idea what to do. My first thought was to escape. So I did. Chicken.

"Thank you, Edward. That was the most surreal, romantic thing that has ever happened to me. I'm not sure why you did it, but it was really sweet. And you should see what's happening behind the bleachers because your girlfriend is a total skank." I whispered in his ear, then released myself from his heavenly grip and scurried away. I didn't look back. I couldn't.

I went to find James since Alice was pressed so close to Jasper she could have shared his boots. Can guys have F-me boots too? If so, Jasper's were definitely in that category.

I saw James with his "conquest" in a dark corner, so I couldn't bother him either. Is everybody hooked up but me? Damn. It was like being back in Phoenix, all super-loner extraordinaire. Hello, Frizzy Izzy, you're back.

I sat alone on the bleachers like the other wallflowers. I was feeling sorry for myself listening to the end of my song, when Mike came to sit with me. He was such a sweetheart.

"Bella, do you want to dance some more? It looks like your friends are sort of busy. You know I always have time for you." Could he be more perfect? Honestly, yeah, he could be Edward.

"You know, that's exactly what I need. Let's dance, Mike." We danced for a few songs with his freshman and sophomore friends who kept giving Mike thumbs up and high fives. It was kind of cute, like he was the king of the geeks. I felt really comfortable with them because until two and a half months ago, I was one of them. In fact, I felt more at ease with them than I did with anyone other than Alice or Angela. It was safe and comfortable, better than the confusion and heartache of my current non-existent love life.

I shut out all of the other sights and sounds around me, and focused on Mike and his friends doing some really atrocious moonwalks. I resisted the urge to gawk at Edward for once, thank god, because I don't think I could handle seeing him. I made a total fool out of myself earlier, and I did not need a repeat of that performance. I practically did the Baby/Patrick Swayze lift from _Dirty Dancing _with him. God, it gets more humiliating every time I think about it.

Mike excused himself to go to the bathroom and I decided to get a drink. I couldn't help but notice Edward standing by himself, staring at me with a strange expression. He looked hurt and baffled. Christ, listen to the song that was playing. Fucking Madonna.

_**It's all brand new, I'm crazy for you, you know it's true. . .**_

I blushed under his gaze and turned away. I looked up into bright blue eyes, red lipstick (smudged), and a scowl.

"What in the name of all that is holy are you doing by yourself when you should be with Edward?" It came out in a whoosh from Alice's rapidly moving mouth. "He just did the most romantic thing ever, and you walk away? Are you high? Did someone spike the punch?"

"Alice, I know it was really sweet, but he was just feeling sorry for asking me out and then getting back with Tanya."

"You _are_ high. Let's get you to Forks General."

"Stop joking, I'm serious. Nothing has changed between Edward and I except now I am totally embarrassed that I jumped on him."

"Bella, Edward is not with Tanya. In fact, I think he can't stand her."

"Alice, I didn't get to tell you, but I saw Tanya making out with someone behind the bleachers. I told Edward about it after the whole song thing. Maybe it wasn't the first time he caught her, and they got into a fight. That's why he asked me out."

"What a skeeze. I knew she was a total 'ho. What the hell does he see in her?" She turned to look at Edward with a frown on her face.

"Yeah, it was pretty graphic. I hope that's not what my first kiss will be like. It was gross and awkward."

"Trust me, kissing is not gross," sighed Alice with a dreamy look on her face. "I didn't realize what I was missing."

"Oh, Alice, I'm so happy for you. Please stop worrying about my sad life, and let's hear about your man."

She giggled. "My man is incredible. Did you see what he was wearing? Mmm. There were so many things right about it I don't know where to start. He's also sweet, funny, interesting, smart, and he likes clothes. Can you believe it?" She gushed all of the attributes of Jasper, and I was so happy for her. But all I could manage was a weak smile.

"C'mon, Bella. You owe me a dance before we go." Alice squealed at the song that came on. Oh shit, they just put on some Depeche Mode. Look out, dance floor.

So we busted out our 80s moves: Roger Rabbit, the Kid 'n Play, the robot, and it was so fun, I forgot about Edward for a bit. Well, kind of. I mean how do you forget that guy? I glanced around and saw two-thirds of the trashy trio dancing nearby. No Tanya. Were she and Edward fighting, or making up? Ug. Gross thought.

"Nice outfit, Alice," called out Jessica. "It's cute that you tried to look like a 'big girl.' "

Alice's face scrunched up as she tried to control her anger. Nothing pissed her off more than people making fun of her size. "Thanks, Jess. Way to camouflage that botched boob job with the corset. They almost look normal," she replied sweetly.

Jessica's eyes bulged with fury. "How'd you get Jasper to pay attention to you? Is he doing charity work tonight?"

Oh hell no. Alice is going to cut a bitch in here. "Just because he hasn't made a deposit in your personal sperm bank, doesn't give you the right to talk." She got really close to Jessica's face when she said it. She looked like she could rip her head off. I think Jessica felt the same way, because she scampered off without a retort.

"Fist bump me, Alice. That was bad ass," I giggled. We got back to dancing. "_A Town Called Malice." _That's her song.

I turned down Tyler's and Eric's request to dance claiming loyalty to Alice. No way in hell I was dancing with them to "_Pour Some Sugar on Me_." That would be like an invitation to grope me. There was only one guy who I wanted to do that.

"Thanks, Alice for giving up your time with Jasper to babysit me," I said as I executed a pretty awesome pelvic thrust to "_Push It."_ Thanks mom for dancing with us to all your old tapes during this summer.

"No man is going to get between us. Besides, I'll have forever with Jasper." Alice danced with grace and agility, which was pretty amazing considering the height of her stilettos.

I laughed at Alice's confidence. I wish I knew how I felt, and what I wanted. Just this morning I thought I had a chance with Edward, but now I was completely confused by his mixed signals.

"By the way, what happened to James?" asked Alice.

"Um, he's giving a private show of the "_I Want Your Sex"_ video to some senior, who I thought was totally straight incidentally."

"Ha, that man is hot enough to make anyone gay." We both laughed. I noticed Jessica hanging all over Tyler. Her tongue was shoved in his ear. Classy. "Should we call the ambulance? I think Jessica is having a seizure," Alice joked.

"Nah, she's _dancing_, Alice," I said sarcastically.

"Dancing and Jessica, not a good idea." We laughed some more.

I realized it was getting late when Angela and Ben came by to say goodnight, then Mike reappeared. Alice went to say goodbye to Jasper.

"Bella, I had a really good time tonight. My friends loved you. They couldn't believe how nice you were to them. Hot girls usually ignore us," Mike said with a smile. Then his smile faltered. "You should know that Edward asked about you."

"What? Shut up. Are you serious? What did he want?" I couldn't believe it.

"He demanded to know what was going on between us. I told him we were friends, but I wanted more. He looked like he was in pain or something. I explained that you were completely into him and no one else. He looked slightly better after that. What's going on Bella? I saw that stunt he pulled earlier. Did he do something to you?"

"No Mike. He was perfectly nice to me. It's just he has unresolved girlfriend issues."

"Are you sure? He asked for advice on how to get together with you."

"Are you screwing with me? What did you tell him? What should I do?" My heart was practically beating out of my chest.

"I'm a gambling man by nature, so I say go for it."

Should I go for it? This is completely crazy, but I think I will.


	10. Ch 10 Do You Really Want to Hurt Me

**A/N**

**Chapter 10 Do You Really Want to Hurt Me**

**EPOV**

Yes! It worked. My brown-haired fantasy was in my arms. She was warm, soft, and her scent was indescribable. I inhaled deeply, burning the memory into my brain. Was it strawberry shampoo? Something fruity. I squeezed her tightly to my chest, never wanting to let her go. But then I felt her tense up and she destroyed me with what happened next.

"Thank you, Edward. That was the most surreal, romantic thing that has ever happened to me. I'm not sure why you did it, but it was really sweet. And you should see what's happening behind the bleachers because your girlfriend is a total skank." And she squirmed out of my arms and left me dumbstruck.

What. The. Fuck. What was she talking about? Didn't I just make a total fool of myself for her? What girlfriend? I stood there like an idiot, wondering what the hell went wrong. Our friends had left us apparently as soon as we had embraced, because they were dancing to our fucking song. No one was staring at me, so my disgrace wasn't public, at least.

I didn't know what to do, so I did what she said: go see what was happening behind the bleachers. I made my way over there barely aware of my surroundings because of my shock at what had just happened. Then in the dark corner I saw two people sucking face, one with strawberry-blond hair.

Goddamned Tanya. I could care less that she was lip-locked with her loser boyfriend, but Bella didn't know that. She must think I still have feelings for Tanya or something. Why else would she say 'my girlfriend'? She must feel sorry for me because I was getting cheated on. Crap on a stick.

Screw John Cusack and his romantic nonsense. Things were worse now than they were before. Stupid Jasper and his suggestions. Now he's all over Alice like a Siamese twin, and I'm a complete loser. I needed to explain to Bella, but I didn't know how. Rejection totally fucks up your thought process.

I scanned the gym looking for her tiny pink plaid skirt and black boots. Great. She's dancing with that Mike kid. He's totally in love with her, along with his whole freshman posse. Their faces were all lit up like they just won a trip to Comicon or some shit. I stared at her, because that's all I could do. She had just blown me off big time. I was unsure of my next move. That girl destroyed eighteen years of confidence in one minute. Oh, good, Mike was walking away.

I was gawking at her like the lovesick loser I am, when she looked at me. Her brown eyes sought my green, and I tried to convey what I felt through just a look. I sighed when she blushed and turned to talk to Alice, who suddenly appeared out of nowhere. I guess Jasper had to come up for air sometime. My eyes followed Mike, hoping he was going home, but it was just a bathroom break.

I walked over towards the bathroom to find Mike. I had to talk to him. Bella seemed to trust him, so maybe he could give me some insight. Hell, I just needed a fucking clue. So I waited outside the restroom for him, trying to be all nonchalant about it, because, well, how the fuck would I explain why I was waiting for a sophomore boy to exit the restroom? That shit just wasn't done. When he emerged from the men's room, I stopped him. He looked surprised to see me.

"Hey, Mike," I said and motioned him to come over to me.

"Hey Edward," he said uncertainly. He shifted nervously from side to side.

"You were dancing with Bella. Is there something going on with you two?"

"I wish. She's all hung up on you," he said spitefully.

"How do you know? I tried to show her how I feel, and she ditched me to come dance with you."

"I thought you were an honor student. Seriously, how could two people be so dense? She likes you, you like her, and you are both miserable. She talks about you all of the time. If she had for me one tenth of the feelings she has for you, I'd be freaking ecstatic."

"Dude, I'd do anything to be with her. What do you think I should do?"

"Have you been honest with her? I thought you had a girlfriend, anyway."

"I don't have a freaking girlfriend. She is the one for me. I just need her to see that and stop running from me," I was exasperated. I ran my hands through my hair for like the zillionth time. Christ, I was going to go bald.

"Look, Edward, she's the only person at this school that treats me like a person. She doesn't even know how beautiful and fantastic she is. She's not playing any games with you; she's just oblivious to any kind of attention. Explain to her what happened with your ex-girlfriend, and tell her how you feel."

"Thanks for the advice, Mike. I'm sorry about this whole situation. It must be hard on you."

"Just don't hurt her, or I'll have to kick your ass," he said seriously as he walked away. "Remember, I'll be waiting if you screw up."

Huh, who knew that kid had such balls? And look at me, the class president and captain of the basketball team getting advice from a sophomore. Popularity was way overrated. I had to pretend to have a girlfriend to keep the girls away from me, now that tramp was keeping away the one girl I wanted. The irony was not lost on me.

"Hey lover boy, what the hell happened? Last time I checked, you and Bella looked pretty cozy, now she's as far from you as possible. Did she get a whiff of your breath?" joked Jasper as he walked over to me.

"Fuck you, Jasper. It's your genius idea that drove her away. She still thinks Tanya and I are together and I couldn't even explain the situation. But you were too wrapped up in Alice to notice your best friend getting ditched." I said bitterly.

"Sorry, bro. I had no idea. She didn't like the song, then?"

"I think she did like the song, but she said she didn't know why I did it. She also thinks I'm still with Tanya. Oh, and she caught Tanya making out with her boyfriend and she feels sorry for me. I think that about covers it."

"Oh, is that all?" Jasper said sarcastically.

"No, wait, I forgot the part about when I begged Bella's sophomore crush to help me win her," I snapped at him.

Jasper snorted, "So that's what you two were talking about. Well, what are you going to do now?"

"I think I'm going to give her some space, then I'm going to explain the whole Tanya mess. We both need to take a step back. And I'm not mad at you; I'm just frustrated at the whole situation. I'm happy for you though, it looks like you convinced Alice that you know she's a girl."

"She's definitely a girl. I can attest to that," Jasper said smugly. I raised my eyebrows at him. "I didn't mean it that way; she's not like that." He socked me in the shoulder.

"Well at least one of us is not a total loser at love."

"Yeah, I got it bad, dude," he said dreamily. "She's pretty awesome."

"I can see it in your eyes," I sighed. I was a little jealous.

"Why Mr. Cullen, are you flirting with me? You like my eyes? Alice will be jealous," he batted lashes at me and blew me a kiss.

"Asshole," I muttered. My reputation was going into the shitter in one night.

"Seriously, though, do you want me to talk to Alice? I can tell her what happened with you and Tanya."

"No, this is my problem. I need to fix it. She really needs to hear it from me." I just had hid the truth for so long, it was hard to admit to something so selfish and wrong. She might hate me for what I had done. I turned to look at Bella, praying Tyler hadn't hit on her again. But thankfully she was still dancing with Alice. They looked like they were doing a routine of 80s dance moves. I recognized their motions from old MTV videos. She was adorable.

Jasper looked in the same direction. "It will be worth it, what ever it takes," he murmured, as he stood mesmerized by Alice's graceful movements.

"Uh huh," I concurred as I followed every sway of Bella's hips. My hands should be firmly planted there, moving my body in sync with hers, inhaling her sweet scent, planting feathery kisses down her neck… I shook my head to clear it.

I glanced back at my girl only to see her and Alice in some kind of argument with the slutty sidekicks. Oh, shit! I tensed up, not knowing what the hell was going on. Those two were ruthless. I noticed Jasper making a move forward when Jessica obviously insulted Alice. But then she got in Jessica's face and she must have scared to shit out of her, because that girl hauled ass and lopsided tits right the hell outta there. Classic.

"Alice is for real, Jasper. You better not fuck up. That was some scary shit, and I didn't even hear what she said."

Jasper licked his lips and exhaled, "Damn…." He looked at her with lust in his eyes.

Lucky fucker. He was going to get some action later, and I would go home to my fantasies and my hand. Pathetic. I needed to have her for real, not in my dreams. I had to come up with a new plan, since the old one sucked ass. It was time to put "Operation Get Bella, Part Deaux" into full effect. Part One had been an epic failure.

**A/N**

Review. If you wanna. No pressure.


	11. Ch 11 Maneater

**A/N**

**Sorry about not updating sooner. I was distracted by the latest New Moon trailer. This is short, but I wanted to get something out right away. This chapter gives you insight into our favorite couple's minds. Hope you likey.**

I don't own the characters.

Chapter 11 Maneater

"Ed-0, how's it hanging, bro? You ready for this weekend? I know I am," Emmett practically sang into the phone. Just what I needed to hear, someone completely in love while my life was in shambles. Last night had been a total nightmare. But I needed to focus on my brother for this week, so I sucked it up.

"Everything is set, Em, just show up and enjoy yourself," I replied.

"Hey, I decided to invite my future father-in-law after all. Rose said it would be a good idea for us to bond."

"You sure that's a good idea?" I asked skeptically. Emmett was not known as "Party" McCarty for nothing.

"Dude, relax. He's only going to dinner and drinks. Not the club. Definitely not the club," Emmett laughed.

"So you want me to call him? When are they flying in?" I asked. I probably had to pick them up at the airport or something.

"I asked him last night, and they're driving in on Friday."

"They're driving from Arizona on Friday? That's crazy," I commented.

"What are you talking about? They live in Forks now. Not that far from you. You know it's only a few hours to Seattle."

"Wait, what? Why didn't you tell me? I probably know them. But the only new people I know of are. . ." my voice trailed off. "What is Rose's last name, Emmett?" I asked holding my breath.

"Swan, you 'tard. Don't you listen when I talk to you? Did her dad the Chief arrest you or something when you drove into town?" Emmett joked. "Hey, you must know Rose's sister by now, right?" Emmett rambled as I played through many conversations with my brother. How could I miss the obvious? But I thought Rose's family lived in Arizona.

"So, you wanna date her? Edward?" He brought me out of my stupor. "I can totally hook you up."

"You don't know the half of it Emmett." I told him.

"That hot, huh? Well, you've seen Rosie. Her sister had to be hot, too."

"Smoking hot, Em. But that's not all. She's brilliant and funny and completely amazing. And I totally fucked everything up," I said sadly. I told him the whole story of Tanya and the dance and the stupid misunderstandings. He listened to my pain and commented on my many screw-ups.

"You got it bad, dude. And you mean to tell me you had no idea that she was going to be my sister-in-law?"

"I didn't know Rose's family moved. It's not like I talk to her or anything. I haven't even seen her this summer, since the graduation party. And Bella wasn't there. I would have remembered her." I tried to justify my cluelessness, but it just made me realize that I had been in my own world way too much.

"Are you going to tell her about this? Maybe it will help the situation."

"Actually I don't think so. She's not too fond of me right now, and I really want her to like me for me, not because she's obligated to her in-laws. I'm just going to keep talking to her until she sees we belong together."

"Hey, Edward. Everything will work out. Give her some time, and then explain what happened. She probably thinks you wanted some kind of rebound hookup. Make her see you really didn't have a relationship with that other girl. By the way, what the hell were you thinking? That's some stupid shit you pulled just to be left alone. Just embrace the attention like I do," Emmett bragged proudly. "I have girls throwing themselves at me 24/7. Rose acts jealous at hell, but she secretly loves it 'cuz I'm going home to _her_ every night. Seriously, Ed, when you look like we do you have to learn to deal with it. Remember what Dad said, 'With great hotness comes great responsibility.' "

"I don't think that's exactly what he said." I laughed into the phone. My brother could always cheer me up and put everything into perspective. I am so glad our parents found each other. He was technically my half brother because he was 2 years old when our mom married my dad, but it never mattered. My dad, our dad I mean, adopted him and we were a happy family.

I had missed talking to him, but I understood he was a rookie in the NFL and was getting married, too. And, truthfully, I had been a selfish prick lately. I was lucky my brother and family still loved me after being such a douche.

"Well, it was something like that. He had the right idea."

"Hey, Em. Do you think you can help me get a date with your sister-in-law?"

"Bro, I thought you'd never ask."

**BPOV**

"So I decided that I would see what happens," I told Alice. We sat on my bed rehashing every single detail of last night. "I'm not mad, I'm just, well, whatever." Such eloquence from a future English major. I inhaled deeply and tried to convey my feelings with the exhale. "I'm confused. I wish I knew how he felt and what exactly is going on with She-who-shall-not-be-named. What I know is that he broke up with her, asked me out, and then I saw them together. Maybe he was making her jealous."

"Bella, I told you what Jasper said. Tan-" I coughed loudly to keep her from saying that name out loud. "Ok, 'Lord Voldemort' grabbed Edward because she's totally pissed he dumped her for you," Alice stated as she rolled her eyes at my childishness.

"I've heard you, Jasper, Mike, and even James give their opinion of the story. The one person who won't tell me is the only person whose point of view actually matters."

"Well you're right on that count. But he's probably as confused as you are. You know boys are clueless."

"Actually, I have zero experience except for watching the movie _Clueless._"

"Hey, Cher totally got her man. Don't knock movie romance, Bell. Besides, I think everything will work out. I have a feeling about you two, and my hunches are never wrong," Alice said confidently. "Just promise me you will be open to his advances, because I know he's going to "bust a move." " She started dancing around singing the song. "You want it, you got it..."

"The dance is over, Alice." I said laughing my ass off. "So, James says I should go out on a date with someone else so Edward knows I'm not just waiting around for him. He says it will make me more desirable."

"I think that's a good idea, Bella. Who are you going to go out with? It's got to be someone that will drive Edward crazy." Alice thought for a moment and we both said at the same time, "Tyler!"

"Bella's going for a ride in the pussy wagon!" sang Alice.

"Sweet bejezus, what? I'm not ready for that level of action," I stammered.

"Relax, Bell. It's just a date. People go out on them everyday. You have Tyler and Edward in English, right? That's the perfect time to flirt with both of them. Just one look will be enough for Tyler, he's got it so bad for you."

"That's not very fair to Tyler."

"Tyler is a total man-whore. He deserves it. Besides, you are not going to be mean. You are just going on a friendly date to a nice, public place. Preferably where Edward will see you. Ooh! I've got it! The bonfire on Wednesday will be perfect. Tyler is the captain of the football team, so he has to go," Alice practically gloated over her perfect plan.

"Are you sure Edward will go?"

"He has to, he's class president. Besides, everyone goes. What the hell else are we going to do in Forks? Ok, so we need to pick your outfits. How do you feel about a mini skirt? I think I need to call our fashion consultant… James!!" She shouted down the hall.

Oh, good god, I cursed to myself. It would be a long day.

Four hours, twenty outfits, and a temper tantrum later, (James's, because I wouldn't go braless) we had two "perfect" outfits designed to bring Edward to his knees.

"Zat weel blow heez mind," James declared as I stood in my Monday outfit. "I ulmost wunt you."

"Told you so, Bells. Never underestimate the power of a stylist," said Alice with a smug smile.

"I can barely walk Alice. You can see my crack." I muttered while wearing a silver halter-top and the tightest low-rise pants ever to grace my figure. I don't know how we got the zipper up. Alice and James had to use pliers.

"You don't need to walk. Just look hot."

"Oui. Haute. Parlez vous sexy?" James chimed in with his two French cents.

"I'm having trouble taking deep breaths," I told her.

"Perfect. Edward will think you're panting."

Nothing changes Alice's mind. Not even my exposed ass crack or lack of oxygen.

"Fine, but you need to squeeze my cheeks into these in the morning," I huffed.

"Of course, silly. You can't handle the pliers. Just make sure not to eat or drink tomorrow so you don't have to pee."

Fantastic. The things we do for love.

**A/N**

**I apologize for exaggerating James's accent. I think it's funny.**

**I plan to update soon. Review, please.**

**Reviews=embraces with shirtless Rob in Italy**


	12. Ch 12 Bizarre Love Triangle

**A/N**

**I have an entry in the Naughty Heels 80s music contest. I couldn't resist. Please go to the site to read and vote for some awesome stories.**

**The link:**

**www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/u/2060377/**

**I don't own Twilight. If I did, I probably could get RPatz as my boy t****oy**.

Chapter 12

Bizarre Love Triangle

Well, I got my jeans zipped without assistance. I duplicated Alice's 'look' for today's manhunt. These were things I could handle. Seduction, not so much.

I didn't think I could go through with it. I was not a seductress by any stretch of the imagination. Alice seemed to think I was going to sashay into English class and leave a wake of love devastation. I was just hoping not to trip and fall again.

I was dressed and ready for school when I realized I didn't want to play any games with Edward. Whether or not he was playing with me wasn't the issue, it was a matter of my own integrity. I decided to just go to school and let things happen. I just had to convince Alice. She wanted me to loosen up and make Edward jealous in the process. I didn't even know if Edward was still interested. He had asked me out last week and there was that whole iPod thing, but I hadn't heard from him since. I was curious to see how he was going to act today. I guess I would have my answers soon enough.

I thought about my conversation with my sister Rose last night. Alice wasn't the only one who wanted me to step out of my comfort zone. Rose called to talk about some wedding details and about her bachelorette party on Friday night. Of course she had planned it herself, even though I was the maid of honor. I think she was forced to have me in that role. We didn't exactly get along well. We didn't fight, but we had nothing in common and we rarely spoke.

It was probably best, though, that I didn't plan the party, because I had no experience in such things except for watching movies about bachelorette parties. My idea of fun would be pizza and a DVD or reading some Harry Potter fanfiction. Luckily, instead of tipping strippers, we were having spa treatments in a suite at the hotel where she was getting married. Thank god, I don't think I could have stomached naked guys rubbing themselves on me.

While we were having a semi-decent conversation, which was unusual because Rose was, well, Rose, she tried to set me up with her soon-to-be brother in law. Apparently he had seen a picture of me and wanted to meet me. He must be desperate if he wanted a blind date with me. And what picture did she show him? She couldn't possibly have a decent picture of me. She claimed he was super hot and a total brain, but I didn't really want to go out with a strange guy. It just wasn't me. But then again, how was I supposed to know what a date was like unless I actually went on one? Aaahhh. So confusing. She really pushed hard about the date, even saying Emmett would consider it a personal favor. I guess he couldn't be too horrible, Emmett was hot in a beefcake way. I finally gave her a maybe for an answer.

I walked towards the kitchen to eat breakfast, only to be greeted by my new friend, James. "What's 'appeneen, 'ot stuff?" he asked me with a grin. "Zis Edward weel not be able to control 'eemself."

I laughed at his absurd statement. "I can't believe you're home. Have you already hooked up with every available guy in Forks?"

"I believe zee term eez 'sleem peekings'? You and Aleece have zee best men."

I sighed. "I don't have anyone, James."

"But you weel," he said with confidence. He gave me a double "air kiss" and left for, well, I don't know where. He was taking advantage of his new surroundings, for sure.

"Good morning, everyone," I said with a fake smile as I entered the kitchen. I didn't want to answer questions all morning about why I had a frown on my face.

"Morning, Bells," my dad said. "How was the dance? We haven't really seen you all weekend."

I faltered slightly, then answered. "Uh, it was OK. You know I'm not a great dancer."

"Nonsense. You had 5 years of tap and ballet," my mother retorted. "How were the outfits? I wish I could have seen everyone."

"It was fun, mom."

"Did you meet any cute boys? If not, you know Emmett's brother will be at the wedding, and he is sooo good-looking, just like his father. Now that man," my mother was fanning herself, "is de-lish."

"Mom!" I exclaimed, horrified. My dad chuckled. "I can't believe you were ogling your in-laws. You are probably going to have to spend a lot of time with them."

"I hope so," she said dreamily. "That son of his will be even hotter, I guarantee. That whole family is too perfect."

"Well, I guess Rose finally met her perfect match. So, what are you up to today?" I said, trying to change the subject.

"We're taking Grandma and Grandpa sight seeing."

"Have fun. Oh, Alice is here to take me to school," I said when I heard her familiar knock. "See ya."

We arrived at school in a short amount of time because Alice was driving. I complained about how fast she was going the whole way. "I hope you get a car for your birthday so I don't have to hear your whining anymore," she snapped.

"I wouldn't hold your breath. They haven't even mentioned my birthday in weeks."

"You should have a big party with a band and tons of people, and a new car in the driveway with a ribbon on it. And Edward is your date and MTV films it for My Super Sweet Sixteen," said Alice.

"Yeah, that's going to happen. I bet I won't even get a 'happy birthday.' Besides, I'm going to be seventeen."

We walked into school towards our lockers. "I didn't say it before, but you look awesome, Bella. Edward is going to eat his heart out," Alice gushed and rubbed her hands together.

"Yeah, about that-" I stopped talking because the bane of my existence was standing near my locker talking to her friends. Loudly. Like she wanted me to hear everything.

"So Edward was soo sweet on Sunday. After that big _misunderstanding_ with that new girl, I decided to forgive him and let him make it up to me. He explained he was just trying to make me jealous with that dumb song he dedicated to _her._ Oh, the things he did to me to make up for it." she laughed, or should I say cackled, as her friends Jessica and Lauren smiled smugly at me.

I was speechless. I froze in my spot in front of the lockers. Alice must have noticed my discomfort, because she said loudly, "Damn, Bella. Why didn't you tell me that the _Rock of Love_ bus was auditioning new skanks today? I would have brought my Poison CD for Bret Michaels to sign." Tanya looked like she smelled rotten eggs. "Aw, what's wrong, Tanya? Not slutty enough to make the show? I'm sure they didn't get to know the real you, or you would be on the bus right now." I was barely breathing, but I knew Alice had struck a nerve because Tanya was beet red, and the vein in her forehead looked like it would burst at any moment.

"Fuck off, midget," she spat. "You and new girl are just jealous of our popularity."

"Oh, is that the new term for being a total whore, 'popular'? And by the way, nice vocab. I can see why you are the top of your remedial English class. Bella," she emphasized my name, "let's get out of here before we catch something nasty and need penicillin." With that statement, we walked off. I tried to look confident, but I probably failed miserably.

"Oh my god, Alice. Did you hear what she said?"

"Of course I did. But you know she did it on purpose, Bella. She was trying to make you feel bad."

"She was pretty successful. But you, you were awesome. Thank you for sticking up for me."

"You are my best friend. I'd do anything for you." We got to our first class and settled in. "So, are you ready for today?"

"Obviously I'm not trying to get Edward, Alice. She can have him."

"I'm telling you to make him eat his heart out. Let him know what he's missing. If he's dumb enough to be with that bimbo, he deserves what he gets. You don't have to take him from Tanya, just make him wish she was you. You can take your pick of the other guys at school. Well, except for Jasper."

"You're right, Alice. I need to break out of my shell. I'm not going to chase guys, but if they come to me, well, good. I'm going to go for it," I mustered my confidence as best I could. We talked through the rest of class about her relationship with Jasper. She was so happy that things were working out between them. They had talked on the phone for a few hours last night, and he asked her to go to the bonfire with him. Soon, class was over. Honestly, I needed to start paying attention to my class work.

When first period was over, I felt my knees buckle. I knew I had to face Edward. I walked to English class hoping it wouldn't be awkward. I guess I got lucky, because I sat down before the rest of the class got there. When Tyler walked in, I beamed at him. He looked at me like he just got a new toy for Christmas. He walked over and sat next to me, his eyes shining with confidence. Here we go. "Hey, beautiful. How's it going?" Wow. Such a charmer. Oh, oh. Here comes Edward. Hold it together, Swan.

"Good, Tyler. Um, How's the football team doing?" I said as Edward glanced at me, then Tyler. He looked pissed.

"Our first game is on Thursday. We're going to crush Port Angeles," he said with enthusiasm. Edward sat near us. He seemed like he was listening to us. "You know we have a pep rally on Wednesday night?"

"Oh yeah. I heard about it. What's it like?" I asked innocently.

"Why don't you go with me and I can show you personally?" Edward dropped his books on the floor with a loud whack. We turned to look at him.

"Sorry," he barked out. "Don't let me interrupt," he sneered at us.

"So, what about the pep rally?" Tyler turned back to me. He flashed what I must assume was his panty-dropping smile. I, however, clamped my legs shut. I took a deep breath and answered him. It was only a date, right?

"That sounds super fun, Ty." I wanted to punch myself. How did girls act like this? Crack! Edward snapped his pencil in half.

"Oops," Edwards said with venom in his voice. Why the hell was he so bent out of shape?

"Awesome. I'll pick you up. Hey, can I get your number?'' Tyler asked. Edward was choking now. "You alright there, bro?"

"Fine. Just swallowed my gum." His tone was murderous. He glared at both of us. Jeez, what did I do? Why the hell is he pissed?

"Is something wrong Edward? You seem upset." See, Tyler noticed, too.

"Everything is freaking fabulous, _TY_. I'm so glad you found a date. But what are the rest of your groupies going to do?" Edward's voice dripped with sarcasm. "We may have a cheerleader mutiny."

"Ha, good one dude. Those girls can't compete with Bella, anyway." Tyler smiled at me, and I shifted uncomfortably in my seat.

"Yes. I know. Bella is special," he said softly, gazing at me, his eyes filled with an emotion I did not recognize.

I sucked in a breath and my eyes widened in reaction to his intense stare. How did he do this to me? _Why _would he do this? Thank goodness class started and we didn't have any more conversations, but he continued to look at me with the same emotion in his eyes. I hid behind my curtain of hair, but I could peek through the strands to see him staring at me. Why were boys so confusing? I guess my inexperience with the opposite sex has left me with a disadvantage. I couldn't learn about this stuff in books or movies.

I was tempted to take a picture of his face and send it to Rose. She'd know that look. She'd seen them all. Ah ha! This was something my dear sister could help me with. She knew everything about boys and dating. I needed more experience in this area. So I made a decision. I texted her,

_Want to meet Emmett's bro. Please help me. Need date lessons. –B_

_Absolutely. U wont regret it. –R_

There. Now I had two dates. That was a 200% increase over my previous total.

EPOV

Was she trying to kill me? A date with Tyler? He was a total sleazebag. I should know, he told Jazz and me about every one of his conquests. What an idiot I am! I couldn't sleep all night because I was so worried that she would be hurt about Saturday, and this morning she's dressed to kill and passing out phone numbers. I am apparently under a misapprehension. I thought she knew I liked her.

I thought about what had just occurred in second period. I had walked to English class hoping that I might at least get a greeting from her. I had intended on giving her space after she ran away from me at the dance, but not so much that she would think I wasn't interested. She, however, had an entirely different plan in mind. She looked incredible and was smiling at Tyler. She flirted with him and he asked her out. Asked. Her. Out. In front of me. She said yes and called him _Ty_. I wanted to hurl at the sound of her musical voice saying his name. I tried in vain to distract them by dropping my books and snapping my pencil, but it didn't work.

I tried to come up with the words to explain how wrong this was, but I just ended up making some sarcastic remarks. Then I looked at her and told her she was special. I held her gaze for a moment, as she reacted in disbelief. Her reaction told me she couldn't possibly know how I felt about her. If she had any idea, she wouldn't have done this shit. That date is not going to happen.

I sat there in class lost in thought about how to fix this mess. That kid Mike said I needed to be honest. I really hadn't. Bella didn't know the story about Tanya and that was the main problem. On top of that, I had never told her directly of my feelings for her. I just assumed she knew. For chrissakes, I was a relationship retard. Yet another example of hiding my true self away. A sophomore geek had to explain the nuts and bolts of dating to me. I ran my hand through my hair in frustration. Just then, I got a text message.

_Good news. U got a date w/ur hottie. Sat. bring ur A-game. –Em_

My A-game? What the hell would that be? So far I was failing miserably. Too bad this wasn't Calculus or basketball. I needed Emmett to help me. My panic subsided and slowly I started to smile as I realized I had a date. _With Bella._ She just didn't know it yet.

**A/N**

**Should she go on the date with Tyler? And who totally hates Tanya?**

**Give me some ideas on what love song Edward should play at the wedding.**

**Review, my friends. You know you want to.**


	13. Ch 13 Is She Really Going Out with Him?

**A/N**

**Sorry for the long wait between chapters. **

**Chapter 13**

**Is She Really Going Out With Him?**

Pathetic. I had resorted to flirting with man whores to get a date. Of course Tyler ate that shit up. It didn't help that the boy of my dreams was glaring at me the entire time. Suck it, Cullen. I had to hear your girlfriend insult me first thing this morning along with a play by play of your sex life. Ugh. I threw up a little in my mouth at the thought.

When will this bell ring? I've got to get out of here. Tyler is undressing me with his eyes, and Edward looks like I punched him in the stomach. Riinnnnggg. Thank God.

"Can I walk you to your next class, Bella?" Tyler asked.

"Um, no thank you. I'm going to the bathroom," I blurted out as I practically sprinted from the class. They probably thought I had a digestive problem. Vomit or diarrhea-that's attractive. I took several deep breaths to calm my nerves as I walked quickly to find Alice.

"What the hell, Bella?" Alice asked with concern. She must have noticed the panic in my eyes.

"Uh. I…" I glanced at Jasper who was standing with Alice. She realized the source my hesitation.

"Bella, it's ok. Jasper knows you like Edward. He won't hurt you." Alice beamed at him as I blushed a deep crimson.

"Uh, hi Jasper. I guess we finally meet at last."

"Bella. I've heard so much about you. It's a pleasure to finally meet you," he smiled at me.

"Yeah. Alice likes to talk." I fidgeted around nervously. I didn't do well talking to hot guys.

"Not from Alice, from Edward. You're all he talks about," Jasper replied.

"Why would Edward talk about me? Is he mad or something?"

"You're shitting me right, Bella? You have no idea how Edward feels about you?"

"Jasper, Edward has a girlfriend. She made it very clear to me that he is, um, 'giving it to her good' just this morning," I said with disgust.

"She, you mean Tan-," said Jasper.

"Don't say that name," interrupted Alice. "She was absolutely horrible to Bella this morning. She threw it in her face about how she and Edward reconciled after the dance." She glanced sympathetically at me.

"I have no idea what that viper is up to, but I can assure you Edward wouldn't tap that with another dude's dick. He absolutely loathes her. He dumped her ass last week. Besides, they weren't really together in the… uh, I better let Edward tell the story." Jasper stopped just when I was getting some answers. What the hell?

The bell rang signaling the next class and I bit back another sarcastic remark.

I huffed my way through the next few classes until it was lunch. Ahhh, I have to see everyone. I trudged into the cafeteria trying to avoid the 'trashy trio.' How the hell did she get so popular? Edward. Right. Maybe she paid him to be her boyfriend a la _Can't Buy me Love_, -no that's ridiculous. A girl can hope, though.

I sat at my regular table with Alice, Angela, and Ben. Jasper and Edward were conspicuously absent. I didn't even ask where they were. Ha, see, I'm not that whipped. I was actually glad for the break from all that attractiveness- it can't be natural to be that hot.

"Hey Bella, whatcha thinking about?" Alice asked me softly. "I can tell you are lost in thought."

"I'm just nervous about Wednesday. It's my first date."

"Don't worry. I'll help you. You know I have lots of experience," she teased.

"Yeah, two whole dates. One was with your cousin."

"He looks very cute now after the corrective surgery, thank you," she snapped.

"So when is your next date with Jasper? Are you guys official?"

"Well, no. But we will be. And we're going to the bonfire. He's going to be gone tonight and tomorrow, and this weekend. But that's ok because we have the wedding anyway. Edward's brother is in a play or something tonight in Seattle, so they are driving there as we speak."

"Oh, they're gone? I hadn't noticed." I feigned disinterest. Ben snorted and Angela giggled at my obvious lie. Alice's bell-like laugh rang through the cafeteria. I got up and walked out. Alice called me back, worried she had hurt my feelings. I assured her that I wasn't hurt, just sort of empty. I was missing something. So I did something I never did before. I called my sister. I needed an expert opinion.

"Hello."

"Hey Rose. It's me, Bella."

"Izzy, is your dress ok? It better be or I'm going to call that shop and tear that lady a new ass-"

I cut her off before she could finish. "I need to talk to you Rose. I think I'm in love," I blurted out.

"So what's the deal?" Rose asked.

"Well, nothing has happened yet. I'm just really confused," I started sobbing as I told her everything. The shared looks, the dance, the Lloyd Dobler moment, the skank, the man whore, everything. She actually listened to me-a first in our relationship.

"Oh, Izzy. Trust me, that boy has feelings for you. No one does that kind of sappy shit for a girl he doesn't like. He's not trying to make her jealous, he wants you. All that interrupting and pencil breaking today was because he couldn't stand you having a date," Rosalie stated.

"Then why hasn't he said anything? He's ignored me since the dance. And stop calling me that."

"He's really acting like, well, an asshole. Young guys are really stupid. I've had plenty of guys who've loved me, but they were all immature idiots. Emmett was the first real man, not hunk, that captured my heart."

"Every time I think it's going to happen, it doesn't. What should I do?"

"So, are you really in love with Edward?" she asked seriously.

"I think so, but I've never been in love before," I answered honestly.

"Go on the date with the man whore. Let Edward know you are not sitting around waiting for him. Girls nobody wants are obviously not in demand."

"Oh, like Darcy and Elizabeth! I know what you mean." Finally something I could relate to.

"Who?" Rose queried. I didn't think a literary reference was going to work with Rose. She was no dummy, but she never sat at home reading a book.

"Um, remember that Keira Knightly movie where she wore those old dresses?"

"Oh, yeah. That guy was seriously hot. Yes, you be Keira and Edward can be that totally hot British stud. Perfect."

"Thanks, Rose. Emmett is a lucky man."

"Hell yes he is. I'll see you Friday. Don't forget to bring some hot clothes to wear for the bachelorette party and your date with Ed- I mean Emmett's brother. I promise you won't regret it."

"Bye sis."

"Bye, _Bella_. Love you, sis," Rose murmured softly.

"I love you, too," I choked out the words as the tears threatened to fall again. I never had that kind of connection with Rose before. I felt a new sense of closeness and respect for my sister. I had spent so long in her shadow, I had never bothered to move away from it. Maybe I should have blamed myself, and not my sister. Anyway, enough of Emo Bella. I wiped the tears and went to class.

Mike noticed something was off right away. "Hey, Bella. Why so sad?"

"Everything's fine, Mike. I was just talking to my sister."

"So, are you going with a new face to the bonfire? Or are you going with Edward?"

"Actually I'm going with Tyler," I admitted.

"Tyler? That douche? How the fu- I mean, how did that happen?" He asked incredulously. "You won't go out with me, but you'll go out with that loser?" He looked really hurt, and I felt the guilt creep up on me.

"It's not like that. We're just friends. "

"Well, we're friends," he pressed.

"Ok, next time you need something, I owe you," I promised. The rest of class was uneventful. Edward was gone, so there was no one to capture my interest. I glanced at the cheerleaders practicing for the pep rally, I looked at the other members of the basketball team, but they held no importance for me. Everything was blah without him. All my thoughts included him. I was officially obsessed.

The rest of the day passed so slowly, it was almost painful. Alice drove me home, and I wrote in my journal for a few hours. It felt good to express my feelings.

Tuesday passed in just the same way-excruciating. Everything was just dull without Edward there. Tyler tried to flirt with me, of course. I nodded politely, and ran from the room. Alice talked about tomorrow's bonfire and our outfits. We made plans to meet later at my house to discuss the game plan for my date.

She arrived after dinner. My parents were out again doing some shopping, and James was out on a date. Alice picked out some clothes for me to wear while I told her about my heart to heart with Rosalie. She was happy that I finally connected with my sister, but I noticed tears in her eyes. "Alice, what's wrong?"

"I'm just a little jealous I don't have a sister," she said between sobs.

"Oh, Alice you know I consider you to be my sister. And Rose will love you like I do. I can't wait for you to meet her." I convinced her to talk about Jasper, that always cheered her up.

Wednesday

The moment of truth. He would be in class. I walked into English with my head held high. I summoned my inner Elizabeth Bennet, and sat down in my regular seat. He walked in a moment after with Tyler right behind him. Tyler flashed me an ear-to-ear smile, and Edward gazed at me with his same intensity that always made me feel like he could see inside my soul. I swallowed heavily and tried to breathe normally. I could feel both of them glancing at me throughout the class, but no one spoke. The teacher handed out a surprise quiz. Yes! It was on _Pride and Prejudice._

When class finally ended, the silence was broken. "So, Bella. Are you wearing something extra sexy for me tonight?" Tyler said in what I presume was his seduction voice. I heard the familiar sound of a pencil snapping and a snort.

"You'll see soon enough, Tyler." I wasn't about to flirt in front of Edward.

"I'll pick you up around six? That ok?"

"Um, actually, I thought I could meet you there?" I answered. I heard Edward exhale.

"Ok, baby, but I'm taking you home. I've got plans for later," he said with a cocky grin as he walked away. Gulp. Baby? Oh my. What had I gotten myself into? I glanced over at Edward as I stood to leave. I couldn't help it. He sat as still as a statue with a murderous look on his face.

"Are you really going out with him, Bella?" Gah. His voice was enough to hypnotize me, but he gave me the full force of his glorious stare. I was completely dazzled. My eyes were unfocused. He rose and walked slowly toward me and I backed up. He walked so closely to me that I was pressed against the back wall of the room. He placed his hands on either side of my head so I was surrounded by his muscular arms. "Bella? Please be careful. Promise me you won't do anything foolish." His leaf-green eyes gazed into mine. He was so close that his minty breath washed across my face. Mmm.

What? Must snap out of it. Speak, Swan. "I..I'm just going to a pep rally, Edward, not Iraq. Anyway, are you talking to me now? It's been four days and not a word. So now you want to be friends?" I asked angrily.

"Friends," he spat out the word like it was dirty. "I don't want to be your friend. I want. . .Fuck!" He scrubbed his face with his hands. It was time to escape. Sigh.

"Fine. So we're not friends. So don't worry about whom I date then, Edward. See you around." I rushed out of the class in a huff.

"Bella, wait!" he called after me. I ignored him as I ran away. Stupid Edward Cullen and his shiny Volvo, gorgeous face, and perfect body. Damn, why was I running again? Oh yeah, he said he didn't want to be my friend. Rejected again.

**EPOV**

**Monday**

My big brother officially kicks ass. The side trip to Seattle for his Monday Night Football game was just what I needed. Jasper whined like a bitch because he couldn't see Alice, but it was still freaking awesome to watch the game in the luxury box. I gave Bella the space that she needed, and I spent some quality time with my brother. We hung out after the game with some of the other players. It was hard not be in awe of these superstars I watched on television, but they were just regular guys. Lucky for us Emmett got us perfect fake IDs.

"So, bro, Rose tells me she had a little heart to heart with your girl today. Apparently she called crying over your pretty green eyes. What the hell did you do?" Emmett wondered.

Bella, crying? I racked my brain thinking about what I had done. I was a little rude when Tyler was trying to ask her out, but that was it. "I didn't do anything Emmett. At least I don't think so."

Jasper scoffed, "Hah, I tried to tell you she was upset about what Tanyasaurus Rex said to her about your sex life."

"My sex life? With Tanya?"

"Yes, Denseward. I tried to tell you on the car ride up here but you were all 'tortured musician' with your classical music. So, Alice said she was waiting with the rest of the 'put-out posse' to destroy Bella with the details of you guys getting busy after the dance. Tanya said you were using Bella to make her jealous."

"That bitch," I growled.

"What kind of chicks are you mixed up with Ed-o? You better not screw over my little sister-in-law. Rose will hand me my balls stuck on a chopstick," warned Emmett.

"Tanya is my ex-fake girlfriend. Don't make me explain, it's stupid."

"Yeah, don't explain, that's the fucking problem. Bella's crying over your sorry ass because she's thinking Tanya's right. And you haven't said shit to set her straight."

Jazz was so right. I was a complete chicken shit. I wasn't giving _her_ space, I was being a pussy.

Tuesday we did some guy bonding stuff, you know, golf, basketball, Guitar Hero. While we were at Emmett's house, Rose talked to me about Bella. She was nicer than I thought she would be-she actually gave me some tips. Then she told me not to screw it up or she'd have both our asses-mine and Emmett's. I think I peed a little; she was scary.

We got home late and went straight to bed. I was looking forward to seeing my Bella. Well, soon she would be mine. Not fucking Tyler's.

**Wednesday**

First period I practiced my song for the wedding. My music teacher didn't even bother me anymore. I felt butterflies in my stomach when the bell rang signaling second period. It was time to see her.

She sat in her regular seat, looking beautiful as always. She smiled nervously as Tyler looked at her. I entered right after him, gazing at her heart-shaped face surrounded by chocolate-covered waves. I couldn't help but stare at her throughout class. I barely paid attention to the quiz. When class was over, Tyler talked to her first. He asked about their date, and I snapped another pencil in half. I was thankful she didn't agree to let him pick her up. But then he called her 'baby' and said he had 'plans' for later. I almost tore his head off. She was mine.

I asked her if she was really going out with him, then I got up, slowly walking toward her as she retreated to the back of the room. I pinned her against the wall with my arms surrounding her. I resisted the urges I had to kiss her, to touch her, and instead settled for inhaling her sweet, fruity scent. I wanted to lick her from her collarbone up to her chin, nibble the spot behind her ear…damn, I needed to focus. I warned her about the asshat Tyler, begging her to be careful. She didn't seem concerned.

"I..I'm just going to a pep rally, Edward, not Iraq. Anyway, are you talking to me now? It's been four days and not a word. So now you want to be friends?" she asked angrily.

"Friends," How could she think that's all I wanted? "I don't want to be your friend. I want. . .Fuck!" Why can't I just tell her how I feel?

"Fine. So we're not friends. So don't worry about whom I date then, Edward. See you around." She ran out of the room leaving me in shock.

"Bella, wait!" I yelled after her, but she didn't even look back. Why was she always running from me? Am I some sort of monster? No, I'm just stupid.


	14. Ch 14 Never Going to Give You Up

**A/N**

**I don't own the characters, just an unhealthy obsession.**

**Chapter 14**

**Never Going to Give You Up**

**EPOV**

Total fuck up. So close to her that I could inhale her luscious scent, and I sent her running from the class. Why the hell couldn't I do anything right where this girl was concerned?

I jogged to class because I was freaking late after my latest foray into humiliation. I changed into my PE clothes and started my warm-ups with a vengeance. I looked for Bella across the gym. Great. There was Mike hanging all over Bella waiting to pick up the pieces. Now cue Tyler eye fucking my girl while she bent over. I kicked the basketball across the gym. Oops. "My bad, _Ty,_" I sneered as Tyler rubbed the back of his head. Fucktard.

I had to endure the sight of her getting stared at by most of the guys in the gym. I couldn't blame them; I was staring at her long legs in her tiny PE shorts, too. If I had some balls I'd have claimed her right now. Too bad I feared another rejection. After subjecting myself to 50 minutes of that shit, I drove Jasper home completely pissed off. He almost smacked me for being such a dick.

"Damn, Mopeward. I'm glad I'm not driving with you tonight. You're bringing me down. My Alice high is almost gone," Jasper complained.

"Yeah, well is your girl going on a date with a self-proclaimed player?" I challenged. He said nothing. "That's what I thought." That motherfucker should have a little more sympathy for his best friend.

I went through the motions of setting up for the pep rally. Why we were having it outside was a mystery to me. I was amazed that we scheduled a bonfire since we lived in the rainiest place in the U.S. I think our student government advisor watched the movie_ Grease_ a few too many times. Seriously, she made us watch it so we could set up just like the movie. Lucky for her, we had a day without rain, or that would have been a sad 'bonfire' in the gym—a space heater inside a portable fire pit . . .pathetic.

It was also part of my job as class president to introduce everyone. Which meant I wouldn't be able to watch Bella from the podium, and it drove me nuts.

I saw Mike Newton setting up some light and sound equipment and made a decision.

"Hey, Mike, what's up?"

"Uh, hi Edward," he said hesitantly.

"I have a favor to ask you. You know Bella has a date with Tyler tonight, right?"

"Yeah," he said angrily. "That asshole. How could she date that dick?"

"Well, I feel the same way. I was wondering if you could keep an eye on her tonight. I don't want her alone with that dirtbag, but I have a lot of duties with the pep rally."

"You want me to _watch_ her?" he asked with surprise in his voice. "That's a little weird."

"Tyler's not a nice guy when it comes to girls, Mike. She's too sweet and innocent for him. I need to protect her."

"So why aren't you going out with her?"

"I'm working on it."

"Seriously, Ed, if I looked like you I don't think that it would be that hard to get a chick."

_Was Mike trying to suggest that I don't have any game? Damn, that kid__** was**__ a genius._

People started to arrive, and I waited nervously for Tyler and Bella. Would I be able to watch them on their date without kicking his ass? The odds weren't good.

Tyler arrived right before the pep rally started, but she still wasn't there. The cheerleaders were jiggling their way through a god-awful routine to some mind numbing top forty hit when I saw her. Apparently Tyler did too, because he practically ran to her side. I almost crushed the microphone I held in my hands. Good thing that sucker was off so the string of profanities that escaped my mouth was not broadcast over the speakers. I might've gotten some shit from the principal over that.

She looked amazing as always. Tight jeans covering her perfect bottom. Her coat was open, so I could see her skimpy shirt emphasizing her ample boobage. And, oh shit she was wearing the boots. I was so screwed. How could I stay away from her?

I noticed the strange expression on her face. She looked pained, like she was going to get a root canal, not go on a date. I could tell she didn't really want this. Then she looked at me. Stared. Right into my eyes. Her brown eyes held my green, and I was a goner. My heart swelled, and I could feel the shit-eating grin spread across my face. In that second I made up my mind. I would do whatever it took to get her. I grinned wider and gave her wink.

Her eyes widened and she quickly glanced around. Did she think that was meant for someone else? Of course I meant you, baby. She blushed as she realized I was looking at her. Bella tilted her head down for an instant, but suddenly she gave me a blazing look that took my breath away. I nearly lost it when she shyly returned the wink. Fuck, Tyler noticed she was looking my way. He just gave me the 'back off she's mine' look. He put his arm around her and smirked at me. _Ok, it's on_. I got up quickly to go kick his ass and then I realized it was time to announce the football team because the cheerleaders had finished. I had to introduce the captain. . . Tyler. So I turned my angry frame towards the podium and did my job.

"Thank you varsity cheerleaders for that…um, performance. Now I'd like to introduce the captain of the Forks High Football team. You all know him, especially the girls, right cheerleaders?" They blew him kisses. _Ha, take that man- whore_. Tyler smiled widely and Bella looked even more uncomfortable. _Clueless asshat doesn't realize what he has in front of him._ "Hopefully the football team can improve upon last year's dismal season. So here he is. . .Tyler Crowley," my voice dripped with venom. They might impeach me as president after that shitty speech.

Tyler walked confidently up to the podium, gave Bella a wink and me a dirty look. He said some nonsense about the game tomorrow and his team, which sounded like the adults' voices in a Peanuts cartoon- wa wah wah wah waah. I just stared at Bella the entire time.

**BPOV**

Alice dressed me is the smallest blouse possible. I had doll clothes that were bigger. Seriously. James and Alice both nodded their approval at the finished product, and we drove to the school.

"So Alice, Jasper is meeting you there?" I asked.

"Yes," she said dreamily. "Then we're going for a romantic dinner."

"What about you. James?"

"I em meeting my new beau. 'e eez a total hunk."

"So who is this beau-hunk? Is he on the down-low?" Alice asked as she drove.

"Ze down-low?" he asked, obviously confused.

"Yeah, like, is it a secret?"

"Oh, no," he chuckled. "I thought zat was a sexual position." We all cracked up.

We made small talk during the ride, but I was distracted. I kept thinking about what happened earlier today with Edward. His proximity to me had left me completely dazzled. I could still smell him. Mmm. I felt like he wanted to tell me something after he said he didn't want to be friends, but I couldn't handle all of the emotions and I ran away. Again. And I hate running. I just became a self-conscious mess whenever I was around him.

We got to school quickly because Alice drove like she was in a high-speed chase. I guess someone was eager to see a certain blond hottie. I couldn't blame her. If I had a date with Edward I'd do the same thing. Instead, I was trying to think of a serious illness I could fake to get out of this 'date' with Tyler. Hmm, diarrhea? No, not that desperate.

Alice and James flew out of the car with lightning speed, leaving me to trudge over to the field by myself. The pep rally had already started, so I wandered over to where the crowd had gathered. And there he was in all his green-eyed, muscled hotness. Edward. Sigh. Ah, shit. Here comes Tyler. He looks freaking thrilled. That makes one of us. I rolled my eyes and grimaced when he smirked at some of his friends as he made his way over to me.

My eyes flashed toward Edward. I just couldn't help myself. I was met by an intense stare that gave me goose bumps. Our eyes locked, and I gasped. I felt an unfamiliar heat flame through my body. He broke into a devastatingly beautiful smile, and then he winked. In shock, I looked around to see if he was actually meant me. The heat that smoldered within me spread across my face as I realized he _was_ smiling at me. He was flirting, and he didn't care if Tyler knew. So, I winked back. I felt Tyler's arm around me and I stiffened at his touch.

Edward's voice boomed through the speakers announcing Tyler. The cheerleaders were flirting with him and giving me dirty looks. Go ahead girls, he's all yours. I'll take the perfection at the podium. I kept my eyes on Edward now that I was free from Tyler's grasp. Our eyes locked, and I could feel an intense connection with him. Would it be in bad taste to ditch Tyler and jump Edward's bones? Hmm.

I spent the rest of the pep rally making surreptitious glances at Edward, and trying not to lead on Tyler. Towards the end, I made my way to the restroom hoping that Tyler would give up. I had spent the night brushing off Tyler's advances and I was ready to go home. My phone chimed in my purse.

_Can you meet me after the pep rally? -Edward_

Holy hell. What does he want?

_Why? -B_

_Need to see u –E_

He stared all night. He needs another look?

_We're not friends according to u –B_

Take that.

_I want to be so much more. Please. Parking lot in 10 minutes. – E_

Gahhh. I did a little happy dance in the restroom. He said please. He wanted me. Me. Finally. I hurried out of the restroom only to be stopped by a pair of hands that gripped me from behind. "There you are," he whispered in my ear. I cringed at the sound. Wrong voice. Razor blades, not velvet. I squirmed in his grasp, only to be grabbed tighter. "Stop fighting it, baby. Your hard-to-get routine worked."

"Let go, Tyler." I tried to shove him off. "I'm not interested."

"You don't mean that. I know exactly what you need." He kissed the side of my neck, and I tried to loosen his grip.

"Leave me alone, Tyler," I demanded. He persisted with his pawing of me and I thought about ways I could kick him in the gonads.

Suddenly I was released, and I heard a yelp. Tyler was grabbling his balls and . . . crying? A sheepish-looking Mike stood there next to the whimpering Tyler.

"Oh my god, Mike. Thank you so much. He wouldn't take no for an answer."

"I know. I was watching. I'm so sorry for what happened."

"What did you do to him?" I asked in amazement.

"Vulcan nerve pinch. Then I kicked him in the balls." His face split into a proud grin.

Tyler started to limp away, muttering something about a ' frigid bitch' and 'fucking geek.' I turned and said, "That fucking geek just kicked your ass. You're lucky I didn't call my dad to arrest you." I walked over and slapped Tyler across his face. "Don't ever speak to me again." He shut his mouth and continued on his way.

I turned to Mike. "You are a genius. How can I thank you?" I reached out to hug him, and he sighed.

While I was thanking him for saving me, I heard someone say, "Those guys that jumped Tyler should be around here somewhere."

The voices continued, "Hey geek, get your hands off the Swan. _You_ don't belong with _her."_ Mike blanched and tried to step away from me. I didn't let him go. Those idiots from the football team continued to make fun of him.

"Loser." That was it.

I got so angry when they said those mean things; I did something completely out of character. I kissed Mike and said, "Thanks, Heartbreaker, for kicking Tyler's ass for me." I emphasized these words loudly so those guys could hear. "Here's something to remember me by."

Then I unhooked my bra, pulled it out from under my top, and handed it to Mike. He was bewildered for a second, and then seemed to catch on to what I was doing. The look on the jocks' faces was priceless. Mike gazed at me with such appreciation I wasn't even embarrassed about what I had done.

"Son of a bitch. . . did you see that?" one jock said.

"Bye, Mike, you stud." I waved and blew a kiss to him. I left them completely dumbstruck and Mike with a wide smile.

"Hey Bella, wait." He ran over and whispered in my ear, "Thanks for helping me. You should know that Edward was the reason I was here. He asked me to watch you because he couldn't. He really cares about you." He backed up and said loudly, "So don't cry about it baby. You'll get over me and learn to love again."

I heard someone say, "You kicked Tyler's ass?"

I smiled and left. So it was Edward who wanted to protect me. He did warn me earlier about Tyler. He must care about me. _He. Likes Me._ I walked faster to towards the parking lot. I could see the smoldering remains of the bonfire. Most people had already left. I looked frantically for Edward. Then I saw him. He was leaning against his Volvo, scanning the parking lot. He must be looking for me.

His eyes locked on mine, and he gave me a breathtaking smile. He closed the distance between us, walking quickly towards me.

"Edward."

"Bella." We spoke at the same time.

I continued. "So you wanted to talk to me?" Wow, smooth. He stepped closer to me so that we were inches apart. He slowly took my hand and held it carefully in both of his.

"I wanted to see you and make sure you were ok." He seemed to be choosing his words carefully. "I feel very . . . protective of you. I – I really care about you, Bella. I just wish you believed me. I know I've done and said everything wrong, like this afternoon. But, you need to know—I want to be with you." He exhaled loudly and gazed at me with his sparkling green eyes framed by impossibly long lashes. His thumb caressed my palm. He waited for my response.

"Edward. . . I feel the sa-" We were interrupted by a loud yell before I could finish.

"Dude! You're not going to fucking believe this shit!" Jasper and Alice were running over to us. Edward looked at me desperately wanting to know what I was going to say. I mouthed 'later' to him and kissed his hand.

"Damn it, Jasper, can't you see I'm in the middle of something here?" Edward was livid.

"Listen, Grouchward. I'm trying to save your ass. Do you know that Tan-"

"Don't say that name," Alice and I warned.

"Ok, um- " Jasper struggled for another term.

"Bellatrix Le Skank?" Alice offered. Jasper and I smiled.

"So, she invited the whole school to our house for an after party. Someone just forwarded me a mass text she sent to everyone. It's already out of control over there. Sorry, bro."

"Fuck! She told me she would get back at me somehow. Now she's going to ruin my house." Edward looked murderous. He scrubbed his face with his hands.

"Call the police to kick everybody out," Jasper suggested.

"I can't. Bella's dad will think I'm some sort of drinking loser who parties all the time. And he'll tell my mom and dad. They'd never let me see Bella." He looked at me with his eyes shining. "I can't let anyone keep me away from her." I inhaled sharply, and bit back a whimper. We were now staring at each other, each with unspoken feelings bubbling at the surface.

"Damn, the electricity between you two is palpable. I just got a jolt of it," laughed Jasper. "So, let's go dude before your house is in ruins. Alice is going to drive Bella home."

"I can't believe this shit," Edward fumed. He turned to face me. "Bella, we'll continue this conversation later, ok? It's extremely important to me. _You're_ extremely important." He leaned in and kissed me softly on my cheek. I nearly burst into flames at the feel of his lips on my skin. He brushed a wisp of hair out of my face and my knees felt weak. He leaned in and said, "This weekend I'll share everything with you. Bye, Bella." He kissed my forehead and left with Jasper.

I stood there completely dazed by everything that had just happened. Then I realized what I was doing this weekend. "The wedding!" I exclaimed. "I can't see Edward this weekend." Damned Rosalie. She ruined my birthday, now she ruined my love life.

**A/N**

**Review, please. **


	15. Ch 15 Fight For Your Right to Party

**A/N**

**So, finally a new chapter. Thanks to my new fic-wife/beta, Cosmogirl7481, and Rose Arcadia for proofreading and giving me the seal of approval. **

**I don't own the characters. Obviously.**

**Chapter 15**

**Fight For Your Right to Party**

**EPOV**

"Seriously, Wardo, before Bella you had truly shitty taste in ladies," proclaimed Jasper as I drove like a bat out of hell towards my house.

"Thanks, ass, for the support. I appreciate your sympathy while my house is being trashed," I snapped.

"Did you want me to hold your hand, Chickward? Maybe massage your back? Make it awww bettew?" Jasper cooed in that annoying "best friend-is-busting-my–balls way" he had about him.

"The minute you get all emo over Alice I'm going to destroy you, Jazz-hole." I gestured wildly at him with my free hand.

"Relax, Ed. I'm just messing around. You're going to give yourself grey hair from all that stress. Then all of the girls won't be able to wet themselves over your 'fabulous coppery sex hair.'"

"Coppery what?" I asked in astonishment.

"Sex hair. That's how the girls describe it. Also, they ruin their undies thinking about getting lost in your dreamy green eyes. I have to try my best not to hurl whenever I hear that shit. The worst part of it is they are all jealous of Tanya because she is the one who is supposed to be all over your hotness."

"Did you just call me hot? I'm flattered, Jazz. But my heart belongs to Bella. Maybe I can sign a photo for you… if you promise not to jack-"

"F-you. Don't even say that shit."

"Damn Jazz, do you know what you interrupted earlier? I was finally telling Bella how I felt about her. She was just about to tell me how she felt when you yelled at me." Mentioning Bella brought out a tidal wave of emotions. I had reached total frustration. I pinched the bridge of my nose; a nervous habit that I thought was long abandoned. "Fucking Tanya! Please hold me back when I see her. I might be tempted to slap the shit out of her. "

"Shit, Ed, I'd pay to see that. Although I am completely opposed to violence against women, I have no problem with a bitch slap in this case." His phone chirped and he reached into his pocket.

"Hey Edward? How fond is Esme of that lamp on the entry table? I, uh, just got a photo from the party," Jasper admitted miserably.

"Fuck!" I sped up.

We made it to my house in record time. The twenty-minute drive took only ten due to my insane speeding. Good thing I am an excellent driver.

My house was nestled in the forest outside the boundary of the city of Forks. My parents liked the serene woods and stream that surrounded our property. Our house was my mother's pride and joy, her showpiece. I thought about how she was going to go ape-shit if one of these degenerates had fucked up the house. I exhaled loudly as we drove up the long, winding driveway.

"So far it doesn't look too bad," Jazz commented. "This may not be as horrible as we thought."

About twenty or thirty cars lined the driveway. There were very few people loitering outside. Good sign, right?

"Ready, Eddie?'

"Let's do this."

Now I've seen some parties. Emmett "Party" McCarty is my brother, you know. But the sight before me as I opened my front door. . . there are no words.

Underwear hung from the broken lamp in the foyer. Pizza boxes and beer cans littered my mother's hand stained hardwood floors. Music blared from my father's super-expensive sound system. Various drunken losers stumbled around bumping into shit. And this was just in the entrance.

"Fuuuuuckk," uttered Jasper.

I resigned myself to walk through the rest of the house. "I can't believe this." I shook my head sadly. "I'm going to be grounded for the rest of my life. Please go upstairs and clear everyone out. If I see someone fucking on my mom's bed, I might lose my shit."

"Alright, dude. I'm on it." He took the upstairs, and I continued to check out the ground floor.

Most of the senior class and many of the juniors were drinking my dad's liquor, dancing, and generally leaving a wake of destruction. Some random girls were jumping on my mom's leather couch flashing their underwear to some guys snapping photos on their phones. Classy. Good luck when that shows up on the Internet. A game of beer pong was heating up to its climax in the dining room. Fantastic. They were using my mother's crystal glasses for the beer.

"What's up, Cullen?" someone yelled. "Hey, Cullen's here!"

"Fuck off, and get the hell out of my house," I growled.

"What a dick. What does Tanya see in him? Total party pooper." Lauren muttered to some junior slut named Jenny P.

"The party is over. Get the fuck out," I demanded.

"Ha hahahaha!" I was met with hysterical laughter by the mob currently grinding against each other to some rap song. "Good one, Edward! This party fucking rocks." I shook my head and rubbed my temples. I grabbed a beer and downed it as I walked down the hallway to the music room. I swear if someone touched my piano. . .

As soon as I reached the end of the dark corridor, I sighed in relief. The door was locked. My dad had some valuable artwork in there and it had a key code to enter. Lucky for me someone had locked it. I rested my forehead against the door and let out a deep breath. Then I felt a hand reach around . . .and grab my junk? "Hey zexy boyfriend. I've been waiting for you," an accented voice whispered in my ear. I grabbed the hairy wrist that was fondling my package. _Hairy wrist? _Holy fuck! I spun around to see Bella's French model friend standing there with a gleam in his eye.

"You are not Ereeck. I zought you felt deeferent. Lucky Bella. Eef only she knew wat to do weeth that. Perhaps I help demonstrate?" I didn't know whether to kick his ass for groping me, or be flattered by his complement.

"Uh, no thank you? I um, am totally hetero. No offense." I stammered out a reply, completely red-faced with horror.

"Zat iz wat zay all say." He winked at me. "But I would not steal you from Bella. And Edward, um how do you say in English? Oh, oui, 'get your head out of your ass' before you lose her."

I watched him saunter away with my mouth hanging open. Did the French version of David Beckham just stroke my nuts and proposition me? Unreal. This night just kept getting shittier and shittier.

I walked back to the great room where most of the debauchery was happening. I didn't know what to do. No one was listening to me. So, I went to the kitchen to get another beer.

Mike was talking to some seniors about some girl and waving a bra around. Why the hell did he have a bra? I listened to their conversation more closely.

"…and then she started making out with Mikey here and she fucking took off her bra and gave it to him."

"No shit!"

"Wait, that's not exactly what hap-" Mike was interrupted.

"Was this before or after you kicked Tyler's ass?"

"Um, after. But we didn't-"

"So you're getting a piece of the Swan, huh?"

"What the fuck?" I yelled. "All of you get the hell out of my house, now. Except for you, Newton. I need to speak with you." Mike gulped loudly and turned to face me. The rest of my so-called friends looked at me; then left when I glared at them.

I stared at Newton, waiting for him to explain the blatant lies I just heard. "Well? What the hell happened? I ask you to watch her to make sure she was OK, and you end up with her bra?" I paced the kitchen in anger.

"Edward, nothing happened, I swear. Please let me explain. I was doing what you asked and Tyler was all over her and I stopped him and she was grateful so she kissed me and gave me her bra." The words tumbled out of his mouth in one great stream of nervousness.

"What do you mean he was 'all over her'?" I felt the anger rising. Mike took a deep breath and explained everything that happened. I smashed the can I was holding when he described what Tyler did.

"So, honestly she felt indebted to me and that's why she gave me the bra. The football players were insulting me and she didn't like it. She really is special."

"Nothing happened, then? You didn't. . ." my voice trailed off because I couldn't say the words.

"No way. She's in love with you, Edward. You should have seen her face when I told her you sent me to help her."

"The kiss. Was there tongue?"

"I wish," Mike sighed. I raised my eyebrows at him.

"I'm going to need that bra back." He handed it to me with hesitantly.

Jasper walked into the kitchen at that moment. "Ed, you have to see this."

"What now? I can't take much more."

"Trust me. You'll want to see this." He glanced at the souvenir in my hands. "Uh, nice color, but I don't think that's your cup size."

"It's Bella's, Dicksper." We continued up the stairs.

"Wow. I really did interrupt something earlier."

"I didn't do anything. Mike had it."

"This story I need to hear. But first, ta dah!"

He opened the guest bedroom with a flourish. Sprawled out across the bed was Tanya. She had a new, let's say unusual, hairstyle. "What the hell happened to her?" I couldn't suppress the burst of laughter that escaped my mouth. "That's what she gets."

Tanya stirred and rose from the bed, wobbly and unsure on her feet. Realization suddenly dawned on her face. "Edward!" she screeched. "Like your little parteee?" She proceeded to cackle like the witch she is. She swayed dangerously, swinging her arms about. Jazz and I dodged her while she ranted. "I told you that youdd be sowwreee, Edddieee," she slurred.

"You have no idea how sorry I am, Tanya. I'm sorry I ever called you my girlfriend. Now get out of my house and never, ever, speak to Bella or me again. By the way, I love what you did to your hair. It's as jacked up as my house."

"Wha-" she looked in the mirror as Jazz and I triumphantly left her screaming at her own image. "AAAAhhhhh! What the fuck happened to my hair? Oh my God!"

Jazz and I looked at each other and laughed our asses off. "Can I get a fist bump? 'Cuz that shit was epic. Did you see her face?" Jasper gloated. "God, I always hated her." We jogged down the stairs, definitely in a better mood.

"Is it mean that we're laughing at her faux hawk? I wonder who did it?" I snickered.

"Well, unless Lauren skinned a blond cat, I would say it was her. She was tossing a bundle of hair around with Tyler. Apparently she was helping massage his "injury" when I kicked them of the guest room. I think Tanya and Lauren fought over who was going to be Tyler's nurse, and Lauren won."

"Classic. I have a new appreciation for Lauren. Although she may get kicked out of the Trampy Trio for defiling the head tramp." Jasper and I couldn't stop laughing. "Now we need to stop this party. I've got an idea."

An hour later, everyone was out of the house. We simply hid all of the liquor, then turned off the power except for the front porch. With the cold, and the dark, and the lack of alcohol, everyone was glad to leave.

"So, let's get out the trash bags and survey the damage," Jasper exhaled loudly and rubbed his eyes. "It's going to be a long night."

"I don't know how to thank you for everything you've done tonight. I know I ruined your date with Alice, and I'm sorry. Thanks, Jazz. You're my best friend. I love you, man."

Jasper's eyes widened then grew mischievous, "Before you start blowing me, Ed-0, I must tell you that my heart belongs to Alice. So maybe just a hand job would be appropriate." He ducked as I tried to take a swing at that asshole.

We walked through the house tossing out trash and making a list of things to be fixed. Luckily, very few things were broken. Mostly we picked up a fuckton of crap. People are such pigs.

I walked over to the downstairs powder room, dreading that clean up duty. I prayed no one dropped a deuce and forgot to flush. I was about to open the door when I heard voices within.

"Mmm. Like that. Oh, geek boy."

"Mike. My name is Mike."

_MIKE? I know that voice. What. The. Fuck?_ I stifled a laugh and motioned for Jasper to come listen.

"You're so beautiful. Your hair doesn't matter."

"Shut up and kiss me, gee- I mean, Mike."

Jasper and I both clamped our hands over our mouths so we wouldn't explode. I slowly turned the doorknob to check if it was locked. Jackpot. I motioned with my fingers like we were fucking SWAT raiding a crack house. _One, Two, Three._ I yanked open the door.

Mike Newton was swallowing Tanya's face. And judging by the sounds we heard, she was enjoying it.

"Ahem." We both cleared our throats. They broke apart, Mike flashed a sheepish grin when he saw me and withdrew his hand from her open blouse. Tanya looked horrified, but quickly recovered.

"Fuck it." She grabbed Mike and they were back at it. Jasper and I snickered and closed the door.

"Where's the laundry room? Can you bleach my eyes?" Jasper was rolling with laughter.

"Aww. Our little Mikey is alls growed up," I could barely contain myself.

We finished cleaning up the rest of the house, finally going to bed around 3:00 am. Mike and Tanya had snuck out quietly during our clean up. Good luck with that, Mike.

I decided to text Bella before I went to sleep.

_Hey, Beautiful. I found something that belongs to you._

_Next time you take this off, I better be the one helping you._

_Counting the minutes until I see you. Love, Edward._

I took a picture of her bra and sent it.

**Thursday morning**

**BPOV**

I awoke with a smile on my face. I just had the hottest dream about Edward. I was straddling him in the Volvo with his mouth on my—

_Oh look I have a new text!_

It was from Edward. Edward. Mmm. His mouth. . . How sweet, he called me beautiful. He has my _what! NO!_

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I screamed as I sat upright in my bed.

Downstairs, my grandparents heard me scream.

"_Don't you just hate that rock and roll rubbish?"_

**A/N**

**You need to read Retail Therapy by Cosmogirl7481. It's my new fav. She owns me now.**

**So, who loves Jasper? I made him my favorite character, 'cuz he looked fugly in New Moon.**

**I'll shut up now so you can review. Please. If you laughed, click the button.**


	16. Ch 16 I'm Your Man

**A/N **

**Kisses to all of the reviewers that leave some love. Thanks to Kassiah for recommending this story on the Fictionators. You made my week.**

**Sweaty hugs to Cosmogirl7481 for beta-ing this shizz and talking me down off the ledge when necessary.**

**Yes, the chapter title is a Wham song. I love Wham. Still.**

**Chapter 16 **

**I'm Your Man**

**BPOV**

You have got to be freakin' kidding me. Oh, the horror! Edward was in possession of my bra. Fantastic judgment there, Bella. Whipping off your bra at a pep rally looks slightly slutty in the light of day.

I read his text message again after I had sufficiently freaked out. Wait, he wants to be there when I take this off again? Oh, shit. He thinks I'm a whore! I needed reinforcements.

As I was dialing Alice, I thought about how awkward today was going to be. How could I possibly look him in the eye?

"Alice! Oh my God! You know how I gave my bra to Mike last night? Well Edward has it! What am I going to do? What must he think of me? Ahhhh!"

"Good morning to you, too. How about you calm down? You're making me look positively lackadaisical," Alice retorted dryly.

"Do you understand what I just said? He just texted a picture of my bra to me. I-" Alice cut me off.

"Relax, Bella. Tell me everything." I relayed the text message to her. "That doesn't sound bad, Bells. I think he sounds turned on, actually," she giggled. "He's probably sleeping with it."

"Fantastic. He must think I'm a complete slut. What was I thinking, Alice?"

"You were being a good friend. I'm proud that you stuck up for Mike, especially after he saved you from getting mauled by Tyler."

"Yeah, you're right. I-I just don't know how to act around him," I stuttered as I lowered my head into my hands.

"So, what else is new?"

**EPOV**

"Ahhhh. Ugh. What the fuck time is it?" I awoke with the sun streaming through the window right into my presumably bloodshot eyes. I reached out for my phone to check the time. "Shit, Jasper, it's almost twelve. Get the fuck up. We're late for school." I stripped down to my underwear so I could hop in the shower. Jasper was sprawled across my futon in nothing but boxer briefs. When the hell did he undress himself? "Uhh. Tell me why we drank the rest of the beer last night?" I could feel the pounding in my temples as I grabbed some clothes from my closet.

"It would have been a travesty to waste a perfectly good keg, Wimpward. It goes against the man code. Do I have to teach you everything?" Jasper stretched his arms over his head. "And you can stop eyeing my goods. I knew the sight of me in all my glory might be too much for you to handle. Yes, this is what a real man looks like."

I shoved him back onto the futon. "Fuck you, Whit-cock. I think you have a little crush on me. I'm surprised I woke up dressed this morning." He grabbed me in a headlock and we proceeded to wrestle for a few minutes. "See, I told you that you couldn't keep your hands off me," I grunted as he gave me a charlie-horse in the thigh. "Damn it, Jazz, we gotta go. I know you are hoping I'll touch your manhood, but that day will never come."

I thought about the situation we were in. Wrestling in our underwear. "You do realize that this is completely fucking gay, right? An elastic malfunction and we're sixty-nining." Yeah, and last night I got fondled by Bella's male-escort. This twenty-four hour period has proved to me that I'm completely hetero.

"Dude, I'm completely secure in my sexuality. Don't put your hang-ups on me."

We both laughed, out of breath and sweaty. I was jolted back to the situation at hand very quickly though. I jumped back up and went to the shower.

"You can use any of my clothes in my closet. Help yourself." I quickly took my shower and returned to my room to find a fully dressed Jasper.

"I used the hall bathroom to shower. Thanks for the clothes. Although you totally owe me because you ruined my date with Alice so I could clean up your house." Jasper walked to my large walk-in closet. "By the way, OCD-ward, when are you going to seek help for this? I've never seen anything like it. How is this organized?"

"By color, season, and personal preference," I mumbled.

"Oh." He stifled a chuckle. "I believe I'm a winter." He started laughing his ass off. "Shall I have your underwear dry-cleaned?"

"You can burn the underwear. Like I'd wear something that touched your balls. Fucking keep everything while you're at it. Can we go now, or are you going to put on a fashion show?" I snapped at him as he gathered his stuff.

We got to school as lunch was ending. "Go sweet talk Mrs. Cope into excusing us, Ed. That old cougar will do anything for you when you bat your pretty little eyelashes at her," Jasper teased.

"F-off." He was totally right, though. I haven't had an absence or tardy since freshman year. Today, however, I might even have to throw in a wink because we were so late.

After Mrs. Cope excused us, I rushed eagerly to class to see my girl. I reached the doorway of our class, my eyes frantically searching for my brown-eyed baby. Our eyes met and then she cast hers downward. I paused, confused, and glanced at Alice. She was observing the exchange between us with concern. She gave me an apologetic look and shrugged her shoulders. Now what did I do? I walked to my seat, perplexed.

"Hi, Edward. How was your house last night?" Alice asked. Bella quickly glanced when I answered, showing a flash of concern.

"Jazz and I cleaned up until about three in the morning. That's why we were late. Well, that and a little wrestling," I joked.

"Wrestling, huh? Do tell. Mud, hot oil, jello?" Alice gave me her undivided attention.

"Uh, we were just messing around," I suddenly felt embarrassed.

"Exactly. That's why I want details. Did you guys rip each other's clothes off?"

"Um, we, uh, were just in our underwear." Bella's head snapped up and a strange sound like a cat's meow came out of her mouth. Alice's eyes were glazed over.

"Damn. . . that must have been quite a sight," Alice whispered. She started frantically texting.

I presumed Jasper was getting a dirty text message, judging by her expression. I turned to Bella, hoping she would stop ignoring me.

"Hi, Bella. Did you get my message?" She stiffened and then answered me in a clipped tone.

"Yes." Damn, this was going to be harder than I thought. I tried to tease her to lighten the mood.

"So, I guess I have something of yours. . ."

She took a deep breath, "Yes, Edward. I'm sorry you had to see that. I assure you that I did nothing inappropriate, and I hope you don't think any less of me because of what transpired."

What the hell was she talking about? She still wasn't looking at me.

"Bella, I-" Just then the teacher walked in shushing everyone. Fuck me. Class continued with Bella looking down writing in her journal; Alice, blushing as she continued to covertly text Jazz; and me completely bewildered. Do they have books to explain what just happened? Because I'm at a loss.

Class dismissed, and Bella took off like a shot to gym. I didn't even bother to catch up with her. Alice must have noticed my expression of shock.

"Hey, Edward. Don't give up on her. She's just embarrassed by what happened with the bra. She'd kill me if she knew I was telling you this, but frankly I'm worried you may tire of her emo act. She just doesn't know how to act around boys. She thinks that _you_ think she's a slut because of last night. I tried to talk to her, but you know how stubborn she is. I know she has genuine feelings for you, but she doesn't know how to handle them, yet. She's a really wonderful person, Edward. She's worth all the drama."

"Thanks, Alice. You really helped me. I was thinking that maybe she hated me."

"Oh, Edward. It's the complete opposite of what you think. Saturday is her birthday. Do something nice for her after the wedding."

"The wedding?" How the fuck does she know. . .Jasper. Pussywhipped douchebag.

"Oh, don't get your panties in a bunch. I think your surprise is a wonderful idea. Besides, Jasper tells me everything. We have no secrets." She walked out, leaving me to ponder her "little" speech. She knew Bella best. I was the one who was doing and saying the wrong thing.

All my instincts were wrong, Alice made that clear. I need to pull a George Costanza do the opposite of what I thought I should do. I loved that Seinfeld episode. I figured my formerly charmed life couldn't get worse. I didn't tell her the truth about Tanya. I gave her too much space and she went out with another guy. I let my girl get manhandled by Tyler and saved by a geek, and then my house got fucked up by a jealous ex-girlfriend. All in all, not the most brilliant two weeks of my life.

She didn't look at me once during class. She had always looked at me before this latest incident. She seemed to be embarrassed. Why the hell would she be embarrassed? What the hell? Old Edward would just let this shit happen. Do the opposite, Ed.

I went to gym class, knowing that I would see her again. I had a plan in mind. I changed quickly and spotted her right away.

I walked across the gym with a purpose. I kept her locked in my sights. I was a fucking tractor beam set to 'Bella.' She was oblivious to my approaching form, but others including Mike, weren't. He stared open mouthed as I came up behind Bella and whispered in her ear, "I want to be _more_ than friends, Bella. You. Belong. With. Me." I punctuated every word with a nuzzle of my nose against her neck. Oh, God. Stay cool. I was seriously in danger of losing my shit and breaking the spell I had going. Opposite, remember?

"Isabella, will you please go out with me? I don't have a girlfriend, I never really did, I swear. I promise to explain everything." I felt her exhale sharply and shiver a bit. My fingers gently caressed her shoulders.

"Ahhh. Edward? I-I don't understand," she sputtered. "Uh, last night. . ."

"I just said that I want to be with you. I don't want you to misunderstand me. We've had enough misunderstandings," I cut her off before she could turn me down.

"I think you were being a good friend to Mike when you gave him the bra. I know you had the wrong idea about Tanya, and that she hurt your feelings with a bunch of lies. I know that I really like you and I hope you like me." I laid it all out on the line.

The opposite of what Edward would do.

She slowly turned around to face me. This was it.

"Oh, Edward." She threw her arms around my neck. It was Christmas in September. I just got what I always wanted.

**BPOV**

I got dressed for school by myself-a first. James was MIA and Alice was busy getting ready at her house. I said goodbye to my parents and grandparents and walked out the door. James was sleeping on the porch. I poked him in the side.

"Hey, loverboy. This isn't your room."

"Wha. . ."

"James, what are you doing out here? You're lucky it wasn't that cold outside last night."

"Bella. I 'ave 'ow you say, 'angover. You meesed a veree good partee. Your Edward, 'ee ez haute. I show you what to do weeth heez love steeck. And what a steeck! I felt eet last night-" "What! What were you doing with Edward's stick?" I screeched in outrage.

"Relax, Bella. I thought 'ee was my boyfriend. I do not steal from you." He walked into the house with a wave goodbye. "I must lie down. I need my beauty sleep."

Ok, must get the full story on that whole episode. Alice walked across the driveway at that moment, and we walked to her car together.

"Nice outfit. But it doesn't go with the frown."

"I found James passed out on the porch and he just told me he felt Edward's package last night."

Alice laughed loudly. "Oh my god. I have to get in touch with Jasper and find out every detail." She texted him before she started driving.

We drove to school discussing how I should act when I saw Edward. Alice thought I should forget all about the bra thing and act normally. Unfortunately, I didn't have a 'normal' setting in my personality when it came to boys. I had 'overreact,' 'emo,' and 'wallflower.' Somehow, I didn't think these would work for me.

"Jasper never replied to my text. I wonder if he overslept? Maybe the party lasted really late."

"James was asleep on the porch, remember? It must have been pretty wild."

When we got to school, we quickly realized that something was wrong.

Both Jasper and Edward were not in any of their classes. Apparently, something major happened to Tanya. She wasn't in school either. Everywhere we went people were gossiping loudly about the party, "And then Tanya teetered down the stairs screaming about her hair. Mike Newton took her into the bathroom, and no one saw them come out!"

"Did you hear that, Alice? I need to talk to Mike. I hope she didn't make him feel bad again."

"Let me get some info. Bells." Alice talked to a group of juniors who were sitting in the quad. I watched her type something into her phone and start laughing. She walked back over to me.

"Oh, my god, Bella. You're going to die when you see this!"

She showed me a clip on YouTube featuring Tanya screaming and clutching at her hair…or lack thereof. I felt a smug satisfaction. She wasn't injured; it was just her vanity.

Alice gloated, "Tanya, karma's a bitch, baby,"

Classes passed by slowly as Edward was not there. Jasper had not contacted Alice, either. Lunch was somewhat interesting because we watched Mike and listened to the conversations at the jock table. He was regaling them with stories of his epic night.

"Dude, you got two chicks in one night. One was the prom queen. And you stole both of them from Cullen. Mike, you're a legend."

Mike shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "I didn't do anything with Bella. We're just friends."

'Yeah, right. We know how you kicked Tyler's ass for making a move on her. We saw her kiss you and give you her bra." Mike looked apologetically at me. I looked down. "Cullen must be at home crying." Everyone laughed. I cringed.

Angela spoke softly, "Bella, don't worry about what those guys are saying. They are complete fuckheads." We all laughed at Angela's rare use of profanity, which broke the tension.

Alice and I walked to our next class and sat in our usual seats. We chatted quietly while we waited for our teacher. Then he walked in. He looked me in the eyes, and I looked away.

Alice made conversation with him because I obviously was struck dumb. She asked about his house and then he said something about wrestling with Jasper. What? In his underwear? Now this is getting good. A sound the likes of which has never escaped my lips suddenly burst forth. Alice was captivated and Edward was embarrassed by the story.

He turned to me, mentioning the text and asking about the bra-the one thing that I didn't want to talk about. I answered him as briefly as possible, trying to explain that I was not in the habit of tossing my bras around to everyone. He looked bewildered by my brusque answer. He tried to continue our conversation, but the teacher interrupted us. I ignored him the rest of the class by writing in my journal nonstop. I'm such a bitch. Why can't I just talk to him?

I left class as quickly as possible. I didn't even say goodbye to Alice. The tears were about to burst forth and I didn't want anyone to see me cry. I choked back the sobs and dressed for gym. Get your shit together, girl. I dragged myself out to my regular spot.

Aw, crap. Mike. He hurried over to me.

"Bella. Listen, I hope you don't think that I started a rumor about us. I've tried to clear up the misunderstandings, honestly," Mike was in panic mode. "Especially since I'm with Tanya, she'll get the wrong idea."

"Wait. Back up. You're with Tanya? What the hell, Mike? You told me how she would humiliate you all of the time." I was getting angry.

"She's not a bad person. She's just misunderstood."

"Yeah, I completely don't understand."

Sweet bejebus. Could this day get worse?

No way, Jose.

I felt warm breath in my ear. A scent like no other. A velvet voice. It was sensory overload.

"I want to be _more_ than friends, Bella. You. Belong. With. Me." He nuzzled my neck with his nose. I nearly died from the sensation. He spoke again, reviving me.

"Isabella, will you please go out with me? I don't have a girlfriend, I never really did, I swear. I promise to explain everything."

I exhaled sharply, trying to even out my breathing before I started to hyperventilate. My body shivered as he ran his fingers over my shoulders. I tried to speak.

"Ahhh. Edward? I-I don't understand," I sputtered. "Uh, last night-"

"I just said that I want to be with you. I don't want you to misunderstand me. We've had enough misunderstandings," he said.

He wants to be with me.

He continued to explain all of things that had kept us apart. Everything I needed to hear.

I turned to face him. I needed to show him I wasn't running away this time.

"Oh, Edward." I grabbed him around the neck and pulled myself to him. I didn't want an inch of space between us. His arms wrapped around my waist.

"I'm so sorry for being such a – a well, you know. I just don't know how act around you." I looked up into his beautiful green eyes. Ahh, too pretty. Must concentrate. "I like you too, Edward. I'm just really bad at this. I've never had a boy like me before."

"I find that hard to believe, as beautiful as you are."

I flushed at the compliment. "Regardless of what you think, it's true. I'm just glad you didn't give up on me."

"Bella," the way he said my name gave me tingles in my girlie parts. "I'd never give up on you," He whispered and leaned in, his eyelids slowly closing. Everything was in slow motion. I took in every detail, committing this moment to memory. My eyelids fluttered, my lips parted, my breathing stopped. His perfect lips touched mine and I realized what my sad existence had been missing. Edward.

My hands reached into his hair to pull him closer. He responded with his tongue grazing my lower lip. I parted my lips allowing his tongue to explore my mouth. I gingerly touched his tongue with mine. I was in uncharted territory, here. He reacted with a low moan. Ha! I was doing it right! I applied a little more pressure with my tongue. His hands moved across my back while I wove my fingers though his hair. We continued for several minutes, hours, I don't know. . . I lost track of everything around me except for Edward. I was aware of his every move.

I needed air but I didn't want to stop. I could live with Edward attached to my mouth. I could breathe and eat through a tube.

He stopped suddenly and rested his forehead against mine. "Jesus, Bella," he panted. "What was that?"

"I didn't do it right?" I asked disappointedly, looking away.

"Are you insane? That was the greatest five minutes of my existence," he cupped my face in his hands so I would look at him. "You are perfect. For me."

"For you, Edward. Always."

**A/N**

**Well, it only took 16 chapters for Bella to get some tongue action. Did you enjoy the wrestling scene? Merry Christmas from me to you. **

**For some hot Edward action, read Retail Therapy, By Cosmogirl7481. **


	17. Chapter 17 Lips Like Sugar

**A/N**

**Thanks to everyone who reads and enjoys this!**

**Big Eddie boners in thin shorts to my beta/ficwife Cosmogirl7481 who laughs at my dialogue and encourages me to write. This chapter is better because of her. **

**Chapter 17 **

**Lips Like Sugar**

"Cullen! Can you release your girlfriend so we can start practicing? I'm sure that she'll be available later for . . . whatever," my coach yelled across the gym effectively breaking my trance.

I reluctantly stopped kissing my . . . girlfriend? Not yet. I hadn't asked. I hoped we could now move forward with our relationship. At least now she knew I liked her. A lot.

Bella giggled and turned a vivid shade of crimson. She was grasping on to the front of my shirt and my arms were wrapped tightly around her waist. I never broke eye contact with her. I was entranced by her eyes, lips, neck. Yeah, I was a goner. She peeked up at me shyly through her thick lashes. She licked her bottom lip slowly. If she didn't know the power she had over me before she sure as fuck knew now. I was painfully hard and pressed into her stomach. No girl had ever garnered this type of reaction from me. I had kissed Tanya, ugh. . .but that was like, well, not like this.

"Bella. Walk with me over to the restroom. Slowly." I whispered. I needed to calm down right quick and I really couldn't just walk away without a 'cover.'

"I don't want you to get in trouble. Don't you need to get back to practice?" she queried.

"I, uh have a little problem in case you haven't noticed." I glanced down where we were pressed tightly together.

"Oh!" she gasped with recognition; she then gave me a devilish smirk. "Did I do that? Nice," she wiggled a little against me. I groaned.

"Just nice?" I pressed my arousal into her stomach.

"Very." She wound her fingers in my hair and jutted out her chest so that her breasts were rubbing against me.

"Bella please. Do you want everyone to see I pitched a tent for you?"

"Mmm, Yeah. Kinda?" she murmured in my ear. Jesus, she was going to drive me insane.

"Please baby. You really want all the girls to see what I've got?" I was desperate.

"What do you want me to do to it?" she gasped. Her eyes looked wild and I think a little. . . lustful?

I cupped her face in my hands and leaned in very close as I spoke, "I would love for you to do whatever you like with it, but not right now." She bit her lip and inhaled sharply. Her eyes were glazed and she was breathing erratically. _Yep, I did that_.

"Cullen! Should I get another captain to take over so you can grope your girl? I think Crowley is feeling better," my coach boomed across the gym. And just like that the 'little' problem is taken care of.

I gave her a quick peck on the lips and said, "This weekend. We're not done talking." I started to walk away.

"Hey Cullen. It's not little," she yelled after me. _Glad you noticed baby_.

I broke into a full shit-eating grin. "Only you would know, Swan," I called out.

I fucking skipped to the basketball court.

Then I had to run ten laps because the coach was pissed. So worth it. I would have run a hundred.

I met up with Jasper after school near my car. I should have known something was up by his smug look.

"Dude. . . So you got some tongue action, huh?"

"What the fuck, Jasper? How do you know?"

"Dick. Like five people sent that video to me. Pretty hot. Although personally, I would have used a little more hip action in the grinding." He gyrated his hips then dodged the punch I threw. "Wussward. _You_ are the star athlete? This school must be pathetic."

"Fuck off. Seriously, do you think everyone's seen it?" He just laughed.

"Duh. Of course. Your exploits have replaced Newton and Tanya's ho-mance as the hot gossip. But I really don't see the problem."

"I just don't want Bella to be embarrassed."

"You just jumped her in front of a hundred people and you're worried about everyone seeing you guys?" he asked, incredulous. Fuck, I hate it when he's right.

"Can we go? We have a long drive and I still have to pack my shit."

"Wait, this is a really good close up. You can see the saliva." He waved his phone in front of my face.

"How does Alice stand your ass?"

"Trust me. She _loves_ my ass. Literally." He shook it to punctuate his statement. Gross.

"Loves it, huh? What exactly are we talking about? Spankings, taint fingering, strap-ons. . ."

"Deviant. Only you could turn something so pure as our love into something dirty."

"Come on, Assper. I'll pass on the derriere discussion. We still have to pick up your things from your house before we leave for Seattle."

We drove to his house first to pick up his bags for the trip. We didn't have school tomorrow so we were free to go to Seattle tonight. My parents had been there all week helping Emmett and Rosalie with the wedding plans.

"Do you think you packed enough, Fashion Model Ken?" I asked as I crammed his giant suitcase into my trunk. "Fuck, did you pack Alice in there?"

"I wish. And you know my junk is not missing like Ken's, so F-off. Don't hate my superior styling skills. There are a lot of events this weekend. I may need something other than a button up shirt and jeans," he said pointedly, referring my usual choice of clothing.

"I'm going to take some t-shirts, too," I muttered resentfully.

"You're lucky you're so pretty or you'd never get any women."

When we got to my house I decided to let Jasper pack everything. Except for my underwear, because I didn't want him touching those. I relented on the clothing because I wanted to look good and I was still on my 'do the opposite' campaign. Seriously, that shit totally worked. There's video and everything.

"What about this shirt, Ed? The seafoam color will really make your eyes pop." Jasper and I stood in my large walk-in closet. He held out a shirt to me and I smirked at him.

"What about these jeans, Jazz? Do they make my ass look hot?" I grabbed a pair of jeans. Hmm, those were my dark wash True Religions. So much for sarcasm, they actually _did_ my ass look hot.

"So we're back to the ass discussion?"

"Can't you just put some decent clothes in a bag so we can go?" I casually slid the jeans into the bag with the other clothes.

"Hey, I'm not the one trying to impress a girl. You can woo Bella in your Forks basketball tee for all care."

"_Woo,_ Jasper? Are you using your southern charm?"

"Portland is not the South, fucker."

We were on the road quickly after loading my _average sized-suitcase_ into the trunk. Emmett called while we were on the road. I put him on speaker so Jazz could talk, too.

"Bro! Where are you?" Emmett boomed.

"We're about two hours out. We'll be there for dinner."

"We need to talk." Oh crap. Did something happen with Rose? "Your technique is all wrong." _WTF?_ "You need a little more range with your hands. Now I know you were in a gym full of people and you may have had stage fright, but that was definitely the time to bring your 'A' game." _Motherfucker_. Jasper was laughing his ass off and I socked him in the arm.

"Fucking Jazz texted you, huh?"

"Yeah. Baby bro finally got some. It only took eighteen years. But you better not fuck it up. Rose will kill me. And then I kick your ass." I groaned.

"Did Rose see it?"

"She said to use a little more hip when you are grinding."

Jasper thumped me. "Ha! I told you so."

**BPOV **

Mmm. Someone should make Edward flavored gum. It would be a best seller. Currently my tongue resided in his delicious mouth. Why haven't I done this before? Oh yeah, I had been a total recluse. Damn, does Edward give kissing lessons? He could make a fortune. Is it really fair, God, for one person to have so much? You know, maybe spread the wealth?

While we were kissing his coach yelled out for him let go of his 'girlfriend' and come to practice. Girlfriend, hmm. Is that what I was? No, not yet. But I was definitely up for another make out session.

I clutched his shirt trying to keep him near me but he broke our lip lock. His lips were red and damp and I wanted to continue to suck on them. I licked my own lips at the sight of him. He groaned. Hmm. Something very hard was pressing into my stomach. Oh, we have lift off! He asked me to help him with his little problem. Nope, definitely not little. Yeah, I'm going to help him all right. Help that right out of his shorts and into my. . . When did I turn into a sex fiend? Oh yeah. The minute Edward Cullen, Greek god of teenage perfection, stuck his porntastic tongue in my mouth. It was a natural reaction. Like learning to walk. Or breathe.

I teased him a little as he seemed embarrassed about the rock hard rod that resided in his thin, oh so thin, basketball shorts. _Definitely no reason to be embarrassed, Edward._ I had no real life comparisons, but I had seen pictures. I _do_ have an internet connection. Most men would be proud to pack that kind of heat.

I flirted shamelessly, realizing I was now acting completely out of character. Maybe Edward had activated the Bizarro-Bella switch with his tongue? Yeah, he was totally flicking something in there.

He actually said I could do what ever I wanted with 'it.' Note to self—make a list of things to do with Edward's peen. While he was talking to me all close and breathy and intense, I think I may have melted a little. I mean, from a normal distance he's outrageously hot, but close up with the benefit of taste and smell and touch–_un-fucking-believable_. I think I blacked out for a second. Does this school have a defibrillator? My heartbeat is completely irregular.

His coach yelled for him again and all too soon he was walking away mentioning something about this weekend. Crap. I kept forgetting to tell him about the wedding. I watched his long, lean body walk away. He looked freaking awesome, especially in shorts and a sleeveless shirt. How does he make PE clothes look so good?

Suddenly the Bizarro-Bella switch returned to its normal position and I realized with horror that yes, although I had just made out with Edward freaking Cullen, I had done so in front of one hundred people in the gym. In my PE clothes. Yes, every girl dreams of her first kiss while wearing a Property of FHS tee shirt. So hot.

I looked around at the stunned expressions. Mike looked like someone slapped him. "What?" I growled at everyone, ignoring my usual feelings of mortification. I turned to Mike, poking him in the chest. "I don't want to hear one word from you. At least I stayed within my own species. Fuck, Tanya, really?"

"As I recall, she was Edward's girlfriend until two weeks ago," he retorted. Ouch, burn.

"Touché. Let's just play badminton, Mike." I had no smart-ass comeback for that disgusting fact.

"She's really very sweet," he continued with the Tanya cheerleading. If I rolled my eyes any harder, they'd have fallen out.

"Um, so where is she?" I tried to play the nice, supportive friend.

"She's getting hair extensions in Seattle."

I snorted. "How very Britney of her."

"Bell-a," Mike cautioned, "be nice, for me?"

"Fine. Then let's not speak of her at all." We went back to a companionable silence as we both tried futilely to hit the little birdie. Well, I pretended to play while I watched Edward run laps. When he started to sweat I thought about doing a body shot off his neck. No tequila, just all Edward. I bet he was tangy and salty and I know his taste was intoxicating. Mmm. I think his tongue hit my sex-goddess switch, too.

After school I met Alice at our usual spot. She had a look on her face that made me nervous.

"Spill."

"Huh?"

"Don't play coy, Bella. I know what happened in gym. I just want to hear you describe it."

"How do you know? It just happened."

"Bitch, please. At least five people texted me the internet link." Fucking camera phones. "So, how was it? It looked pretty hot." We got into her car and continued the conversation.

"It was. . . really . . .perfect." I fought hard to find the words to do it justice, but there was nothing other than 'perfection' that came close.

"Awww. I'm so happy for you Bella. I told you this would happen. Wait, how did it happen? You couldn't see that part on the video."

I smiled at the memory so fresh in my mind. I traced my lip with my tongue to see if I had some leftover Edward. "He came up behind me and said I belonged with him. He told me I was beautiful and he would never give upon me, then I turned around and we kissed. After we kissed he said it was the greatest five minutes of his life and that I was perfect."

"Wow. And?" she said, her eyes shining.

"And I hope it happens again. Often. With or without clothing." Her eyes widened in surprise. _Yeah, sex-goddess definitely in full effect_.

"And?" she pressed.

"And he was super hard and huge and he said I could. . .do whatever I wanted with his peen?" My voice went up two registers due to embarrassment.

"Oh, it's so on. You own him."

"I don't own him Alice. I just like him. Too much. I mean, how could he like me as much as I like him?"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Well, look at him and look at me."

"And?"

"Will you stop saying 'and'?" I said, frustrated.

"You know, your insecurity is really annoying. I thought you were over it, but here we go again. Even before your summer makeover you were beautiful, Bella." We arrived at my house and James was lying on the couch with his sunglasses on.

"James, will you please tell Bella she's hot?" Alice demanded. "She's pissing me off with her talk that Edward is too good for her."

"Well, Edward iz fooking haute. And wat a package! But Bella, you are beautiful girl. If I liked zee puzzee, I would be all up in zat."

"Aww, see?" Alice smiled. "How can you not believe that?"

I rolled my eyes and couldn't help but laugh.

I packed the rest of my clothes for my trip while Alice gathered her things. We were driving together in her car because my parents had already left.

While we were on the road, I retold my story to James, who 'oohed' and 'awwed' until I got to the part about his wonder-peen.

"No hand job?" he asked. "Obviously he needed zee release, poor bebe."

"Uh, I don't think I can handle that." Alice raised her eyebrows and snorted. I quickly realized what I said and rephrased, "I mean, I don't know what to do in that situation. You realize that I just had my first kiss like two hours ago? How did we move to hand jobs?"

"You're not going to give him one tonight! It's lucky we have an expert, just in case." Alice commanded, "James, please enlighten this poor girl."

"You may need two hands for zee Edward cock." James made an up and down motion like he was holding a large pipe. I blushed like twenty shades of red.

"I can't believe you've had more contact with it than I have."

"But you got eet hard. I cannot eemagine. It wuz spectacular just resting," he sighed dreamily.

"Eew. Stop getting all excited about my boyf- I mean, Edward's schlong."

"Eef you cannot get excited about _that_, what eez the point of dating?" Alice and I giggled.

"Can you give us some uh, oral tips?" Alice asked shyly.

"Alice!" I exclaimed, mortified.

"Shut up, Bella. You'll be thanking me very soon that I had the balls to ask James," she retorted.

"Yes, balls are veree important. Now Bella, you weel reely have to relax your throat for Edward. Try not to gag."

"Oh, God!" I wailed.

"Zat eez what he said!" James joked. He proceeded to give us an hour-long lesson on the perfect BJ. It didn't sound as scary as I thought. James made it sound. . .hot. He should know, right? I mean he had the parts, too. Who better to explain how to pleasure a man?

"Zen you swallow. And voila!"

Suddenly I had a new item on my list of what to do with the wonder-peen.

Sex-goddess switch on.

**A/N**

**I posted chapter 2 of **_**There's Something I'd Like to Try**_**. It's 80s Edward and Bella. **

**Go read **_**Retail Therapy**_** by Cosmogirl7481. I love her and her story is awesome!**

_**I love all of the story alerts and favorites, maybe you guys could review, too? **_

*******marvar asks sheepishly*******


	18. Ch 18 Girls Just Want to Have Fun

_I don't own the characters. No copyright infringement is intended._

**Chapter 18**

**Girls Just Want to Have Fun**

"So, that was graphic," I stated, wide-eyed. "You actually swallow it?"

"Of course, Bella," Alice scoffed. "What do you think you do with it?"

"Uh, I mean, I know people do, it's just. . . _really_?" I tried to reconcile what little I know with what James had explained. I felt so powerful with Edward's reaction to our kisses in the gym. Would I be able to proceed to the next step? I knew I wanted something more. Just listening to James and picturing myself doing that to Edward was incredibly erotic. My fantasies had just ratcheted up from PG to NC-17 in like five minutes. Maybe I better just wait until we went on an actual date before I started planning an oral onslaught.

"Bella, once you do eet, you weel want to swallow eet. Eet eez veree natural. But, eef not, eet eez good for your complexion," James said, matter-of-factly.

"Oh, god. That's so gross," I gagged.

"Why do you theenk my skin eez so perfect? It's not zeet cream." Yeah, I had no comment for that one.

Soon we were pulling into the hotel's parking lot. Luckily. James was freaking hilarious but way more experienced on the sex-o-meter. I needed to dial it back a notch.

"Oh my god, this hotel is gorgeous!" Alice exclaimed as we walked through the huge, elaborate lobby of the Fairmont Olympic Hotel. Yeah, it was a long way from the Forks Motel. We picked up our keys from the front desk, as my parents had already checked in for us.

We eventually found are way to our rooms. The hotel was so spectacular, we couldn't help but explore a little.

I wouldn't expect anything less for Rosalie. She'd been planning her wedding since birth. Luckily she was marrying a millionaire able to finance this opus. I really didn't know what the wedding plans were, I just assumed it would be ostentatious by all the conversations we had. I just hoped there wouldn't be any live swans. Yes, I meant actual birds. She had thought that was an incredible idea. We had discussed this in the summer. It made me laugh and snort diet Coke on my keyboard when she told me.

"Don't you think it's totally apropos that I have live swans? You know, we're _Swans_, get it?"

Big sis had been Googling new vocabulary words.

"Uh, I get the connection, but it seems a little ridiculous to me."

"_Ridiculous_ is Emmett wanting _seahawks_. At least the swans can be trained." This is why I had not been involved in the wedding planning. I left that to Rose, my mom, and Emmett's mom. I was going to the bachelorette party tomorrow and then I was just going to put on my bridesmaid's dress and fix her train.

James went to his room while Alice and I unpacked and talked. I'm pretty sure he had spotted a conquest in the lobby.

"So, are you excited about your date?" she asked.

Date? Oh my. I had forgotten about the date with Emmett's brother.

"Alice, what should I do? What would Edward think? Do you think he'd get mad? Would-" I stammered.

She interrupted my string of frantic questions with a set of her own. "Didn't we talk about this emo nonsense already? Are you the one getting married? I'm pretty sure you can date whomever you want. Please just try to have a good time. Promise me you won't over think it like you usually do."

"My last date wasn't that great remember? You know the one _you_ made me go on?" Yeah, understatement of the year. I got groped by a douche bag.

"That wasn't a real date, silly. That was a practice date. Bella, pretend it's a practice test."

"But I only want Edward." It came out like a whispered plea.

"Uh, just I uh, think you should make Rose happy. It _is_ her wedding." Alice sounded less than confident.

Ugh. I was so sick if 'the wedding'. It is _my_ birthday on Saturday. Begrudgingly I gave in. "Alright Alice. You win. He better not be heinous like Tyler."

"I promise he's gorgeous! Just your type."

"How do you know?" I asked, suspicious.

"Uh, well, look at Emmett. He's practically perfect. And your mom can't shut up about how she wants to 'swing' with his mom and dad. His brother must be hot."

"Yeah. You're right about my mom. She said Emmett's dad was going to be her new gyno. She was all excited and shit calling him 'Dr. Hottie.' Gross. She made me throw up a little in my mouth."

"Eew. He touched your mom's vadge?" Alice looked horrified.

"Oh god, no. My dad put the kybosh on that real quick. He didn't want his future in-law wrist deep in my mom's lady business."

"Yuck. You certainly painted a vivid picture. Disturbing, but vivid."

"Enough chit chat. Can we eat or are you trying to starve me so I can fit into some too-small jeans again?"

"Shut it. You know you looked hot."

"Hey. I got Edward 'Freaking' Cullen to jump me while rocking PE shorts. I don't need your fashion advice."

"Bitch. You know you love it."

Finally we went to eat. We grabbed some takeout for dinner and discussed Jasper and Edward back in our room. Yes, we were completely obsessed. I even thought I caught a glimpse of him in the lobby.

* * *

"Oh god Bella. . . What are you doing with your tongue? Jesus. I can't hold back. . . I'm going to . . ."

"_Come_ on Bella! Wake up. We're going to be late for breakfast and our spa appointments."

"Shit, Alice. You woke me up right before the good part," I groaned and shook out the sleep.

"Sor-ree, porn star. Sheesh. I tried to let you finish. By the way you were moaning and panting during your dream, I thought Edward had dropped his load already."

"Ugh. That's sounds so wrong."

"Well, if loving Edward's schlong is wrong. I _know_ you don't wanna be right," she sang as she dodged my oncoming slap.

Dumb James. He gave me too many excellent ideas.

We met the ladies in the bridal party for breakfast in the hotel restaurant. I hugged my mom and grandma hello and greeted the other bridesmaids. Rose was conspicuously missing.

"Where's Rose?" I asked my mother.

"She's saying 'goodbye' to Emmett." My mother winked at me and everyone giggled.

Just then Rose came into the room with a beautiful older woman who could only be Emmett's mom. She had auburn hair that framed her heart-shaped face and piercing green eyes. Rosalie introduced her as Esme, her soon to be mother-in-law. She looked very familiar to me, but I knew that we had never met.

"Bella. It's so lovely to finally meet you. We missed you at the graduation party." Esme gave me a big hug like she'd known me all her life.

"Thank you, Esme. I hear nothing but wonderful things about you and your family."

She smiled sweetly and replied with a whisper, "My son does nothing but rave about you."

I returned the smile but in my head I was curious as to why Emmett would talk about me. She was probably trying to be nice.

I hugged my sister and introduced both of them to Alice. Esme went to sit with my mother while we continued our conversation.

"Finally I meet the infamous Rosalie. I feel like were going to be great friends just based on your hand me downs in Bella's closet. By the way, your shoes are spectacular." Alice gushed, nodding towards her footwear.

"You, I like. Finally Bella has a decent friend. I was worried about her for a while. She was always alone or with a complete loser."

"Um, I'm right here." I said rolling my eyes.

"I know, Bella. You look fantastic."

"She sure does," crooned a large and incredibly handsome man that wrapped his arms around my sister. "Beauty runs in the family, right Mrs. Swan?" He winked over at my mom. I think she laid an egg from the way she cackled and carried on over Emmett.

"Oh, Emmett." My mother was blushing and fanning herself as she swooned. _Geez, Ma. Are you going to flirt with the whole family? _ Emmett's grandpa probably looked like George Clooney. He better steer clear of Renee.

"Em, did you see how my little sis has grown up?" She held out my arms to take a good look at me. She gasped as she looked at my chest. "Oh, Em, she's gotten her boobies!"

Emmett chuckled, "Cs, huh? Pretty sweet. Ed- I mean my brother, should be thanking his lucky stars."

Oh. My God. Mortification doesn't even come close to what I felt.

"Your brother better not have his hands on my sister's tits on their first date. He needs to wait at least a week," Rose warned.

"Baby, you know the men in my family and the effect they have on women. I can't make any promises." He nuzzled her neck and she moaned softly.

Alice was laughing so hard she started wheezing. I groaned in protest.

"Can we please not talk about this? It's humiliating."

"Bella, we're just complementing you," Rose said between kisses. Emmett looked dazed.

"Thanks. My self-esteem is now at an all-time high," I retorted sarcastically. She beamed.

"So, what's the plan for today?" Alice asked excitedly. "Emmett, what are you guys going to do?"

"Huh? Uh, we're going to play some golf at the club, get some dinner, maybe play some pool. You know. . . the usual. Um, we haven't met officially, I'm Emmett. You must be Alice." He removed his giant hand from my sister's ass to shake her hand.

"Emmett, darling what are you doing here?" Esme called out to him.

"I just came down to say goodbye to my blushing bride because I'm not going to see her until she's walking down the aisle toward me. And I just couldn't wait that long." Emmett pulled Rose down and bent her back into one of those '40s movie kisses. They should have been in trench coats in the rain.

All the ladies 'awwed' and gushed at the display. Including me. It really was romantic. Emmett clearly loved her and by the dreamy look in her eyes, Rose was head over heels. He whispered something to her that made her blush and she murmured back to him, his face erupting into a dazzling grin of white teeth and dimples. With that, he strode out of the restaurant with all eyes on him. The ladies at the table all swooned.

Rose quivered and drew a deep breath. "Oh, what that man does to me."

"What did you guys say to each other? It looked pretty intense." It must have been good to get that reaction.

"He said, 'I'm counting the minutes until I can call you mine forever.' And I told him he already had every part if me."

"Wow," Alice whispered.

"Yeah. Double wow." I said in awe.

We had an enjoyable brunch with the moms and bridesmaids. Rose and Alice completely hit it off like they had known each other forever. Rose's friends seemed nice but desperate. Not really my type. They were looking for a millionaire match like Rose. One of them kept mentioning Emmett's brother - the one I was supposed to date. Apparently he was 'fine as hell.' Good to know, since I have to go on a date with him.

Alice and I got dressed for the party after a long day in the spa. I had every part of my body waxed, massaged, and primed. It was pretty awesome. Except the burning and redness and the part where it hurt like hell.

"Beauty is pain, Bella. The result is worth it."

"No one's going to see it, Alice."

"Maybe Edward can feel it," Alice laughed.

"Eew, Alice. I'm not ready for that." _Yet_. That boy, well, man, brought out feelings that were previously dormant. I'd probably do whatever he wanted. Like I could resist him. Like I'd want to.

"Sure Bella. Whatever. I heard you moaning this morning. It's just a matter of time," sang Alice with a smug smile.

"Hey, I wasn't the one asking for a BJ tutorial," I retorted.

"Like you didn't want to know." She was right, but I wasn't about to admit it.

"Can we go now?" I tried to change the subject.

"Fine. But one day you'll thank me for getting you that lesson. You remember how you complained about the flat iron? Well it's just like that. You need to know how to handle necessary tools," she replied in a huff.

Rose's suite was freaking huge and incredible. I think it was as large as our house in Forks. She had a catered buffet and a full bar with a bartender. A bunch of her college friends were already there and apparently totally sloshed. Were we _that_ late?

Rose was somewhere between 'dancing on the table' and 'flashing her boobs' on the drunk–o-meter. Not good. I had promised my mom that I wouldn't let her get drunk tonight.

"Your mom is going to kill you," Alice muttered as she watched Rose teeter on her five-inch heels. She had a tiara with penises glued to it. It was like she had cock devil horns.

"How was I supposed to know she was going to have two or twenty drinks before we got here?" I whined. "We better not have any drinks. We need to keep an eye on her. Let's just drink the punch." There was a tall fountain in the center of the buffet that allowed us to help ourselves.

I spent the next hours in a bad Girls Gone Wild video. It was only missing the cheesy t-shirts and a perverted cameraman. Rose and her friends had a boob talent show. She won because she could make them dance to "Super Freak." My dad would have been so proud.

"Emmett would luvvvv to see thish. He lurves my boobieth," Rose slurred. "I won the contesht."

"Bella, this punch is so good," Alice sang.

"I know, right?" I chimed in as I downed another glass.

The mass quantities of alcohol and food had calmed the girls down to a manageable level and Rose was opening her gifts when there was a knock on the door. Who would show up so late for the party? _Mmm. Maybe it was some more punch._ I didn't want it to run out.

"Are you Rosalie Swan?" Three uniformed police officers stood in the doorway.

"Huh? No. I'm her sister. Can I help you?" I asked shakily. Fuck, someone called the cops on these loudmouths. I suddenly felt dizzy.

"You can show me Rosalie. She's wanted." I opened the door completely to let them in and pointed to my sister. Someone gasped behind me as I held my face in my hands. What was my mother going to say?

"Rosalie Swan?" One of the officers called out.

"Yesh?"

"You're wanted for third degree cock-teasing. I'm here to cuff you and then punish you." _Oh my god._

Another cop growled, "You've been a very bad girl."

Samantha, the girl who was after Emmett's brother, started whimpering. Dumbass.

Rose started giggling. "Lock meesh up, Officer Hottie. I'm ready for my punithment," she cooed.

"Pour Some Sugar on Me" started playing and the 'cops' pulled off their uniforms in one grand tug. Strippers. I should have known – one of the cops had a nametag that read, "Sergeant Schlong."

Wow. He wasn't lying. I needed a drink.

Mmm this punch is sooooo good. Oh sweet Jesus. Captain Cock was grinding his junk in my sister's face. Yuck. He's so so. . . . What Grandma Swan would call an oily type beau-hunk.

I closed my eyes for most of this. When I ventured another glance, I was rewarded with a g-stringed ass in my face. Hot? Yeah, not so much.

I escaped to Rose's room. I decided to text Edward. We hadn't really spoken about what was happening between us - just that something was definitely going to happen. I hadn't even told him where I was going this weekend, but he said we were going to see each other. Edward was so beautiful. Must speak to him.

_Hey Edward I had a really weird sex dream and u were in it. I dreamed of ur sch long_

I luv swet Balls luv u dream about me

WTF?

_What? You balls are sweaty? and you love it ? _

I luv u Balls so hotttttt

_U want me to touch ur balls. I lern howfrom james_

Was I misspelling everything? Maybe he was driving or something and texting with one hand. Or playing with his balls? I should leave him alone so he won't crash. Maybe I should check on. . . what's her name. . .Rose?

_Bye Edward. Can't wait to show you my new moves._

I wanted more punch. So tasty. Ooh, police were still here. Police were good dancers. So unlike my Dad. I wonder if they work with him? They gave massages with their crotch. Talented.

Oh, there's Alice. Passed out on couch. Poor baby was so tired.

Mmm. Who made more punch? Must thank them.

I was dancing. On table. I shook that ass.

"I love you Rose! I lurve you Alice. You. My. Best. Friend. Rose, does Emmett like blow jobs? Hahahahahaha. Blow jobs rule!"

The blonde girl that looked familiar jumped too close to the wall. Oh, my sister.

"Rose, should you be jumping on the bed like that?" She smacked her head into the wall.

"Ouch, did that hurt?"

Rose rubbed the back of her head. I needed to help my sister.

"I'll go get some of that frozen water stuff." I stumbled down the hall and waited for the elevator thingy. What was taking so long? Oh, I didn't press the button. Hahahahahaha. I was so funny.

The elevator opened. It's full of . . . large, hot guys. One was super hot. Bronze hair. Green eyes. He stared at me in disbelief.

Edward.

"Edward?"

"Bella?"

Everything went black.

**A/N**

**Love and thanks to my beta and ficwife Cosmogirl7481 who sends me dirty texts and inspires me. This chapter is here because of her. Love you hard, BB.**

**If you laughed, I'd appreciate a review. Someone needs to touch my button.**

**New forum topic: Best Boy Band ever**?


	19. Ch 19 Wild Boys

**A/N **

Thanks to Kassiah at the fictionators for supporting this story and asking Cosmogirl 7481 to guest review.

Cosmo is my hero. She is the chocolate to my banana and nuts. Thank you, soulmate.

Chapter title is dedicated to RoseArcadia who loves Duran Duran probably more than me.

**Chapter 19 **

**Wild Boys**

"So what do you have planned for this date with Bella? I still don't know if it's a good idea to not tell her about Emmett being your brother. She might get pissed off and then she'll have your balls. . . and not in the good way," Jasper commented.

"Fuck. Do you think so? There's nothing I can do now. I just have to trust my instincts. I can't bear the thought that we would move backwards again. We finally came to an understanding." I gripped the steering wheel tighter at the thought of losing Bella when she was finally in my grasp.

"Ok, Ed. I hope you're right. Alice liked the surprise idea if that's any comfort to you. _I_ think it sucks ass. But that's just me. . . _your best friend. . .who you've known for years. _But, if it doesn't work out, you can always go back to lusting after me."

"Jasper, that shit isn't funny. Ugh. I'm gagging."

We continued to banter back and forth until we got to the hotel. Well, Jasper shit-talked and I put up with it.

"Damn. This hotel is incredible! Did Emmett spend his whole signing bonus on this wedding?" Jasper gazed in awe as we pulled up to the entrance.

"My brother makes a shitload of money, and whatever Rose wants, Rose gets. Besides, he's fucking famous. Is he supposed to get married at the Forks Motel?"

Jasper snorted. "Many a couple has consummated their love there, Edward." I laughed as the valet took my keys and a porter loaded our bags.

We checked in at the front desk. The clerk seemed very attentive. . .maybe too much. She kept staring at us and licking her lips.

"So, Leah, do you have any ideas as to what we should do while we're here?" Jasper drawled in his 'sex' voice. I knew that because it was also his 'Alice' voice. "Ed and I are looking for a 'good time,' he said suggestively as he leaned over the counter and winked.

I groaned and he kicked me.

"I, uh, would be happy to show you around, personally, Mr. Whitlock," she tittered. Yeah, he dazzled her. "And I think you'll be much happier in one of our suites. Two big, handsome men need more space than our normal rooms offer."

"Call me Jazz," he said with a smirk.

She nearly lost her shit.

She handed him our room keys and her phone number with a huge smile. I rolled my eyes as Jasper blew her a kiss.

"All your mini-bar purchases are comped, _Jazz_."

"Thanks, Leah. You're a sweetheart," he purred.

I lead him to the elevator quickly. . . before Jazz scheduled a ménage a trois.

"And that, Edward Sullen, is how it's done."

"What? Shameless flirting so you can eat ten dollar nuts for free?"

He laughed.

"You're laughing at 'nuts?' Immature asshole." I said incredulously.

"You didn't think that was awesome?"

"I found it quite disconcerting," I replied.

"Relax with the vocabulary lesson. We're not in AP English. My 'disconcerting' behavior got us a suite. That's sweet."

"How the fuck am I friends with a moron?" I shook my head in wonder.

"You know you love me," he said as we exited the elevator.

He opened the door to our suite and I gasped.

"Jasper, you are the man. This _is_ awesome."

"Told you, Doubtward. God gave me this face and charm for a purpose."

"See if you can fit your giant head inside so we can unpack."

As if on cue, our bags arrived.

"Now I know why you wanted the suite, Jazz. In a regular-sized room we wouldn't have had any space for us with the fuckton of clothes you brought. We'd have to sleep in the hall. Oh, did you double the tip to the bellboy for carrying that ginormous suitcase?"

He threw something at me. Nuts. At least we didn't have to pay for them.

After we checked out the hotel for a bit, we decided to grab some take out and order a movie. Since we would probably be up late tomorrow, we wanted to get some extra sleep.

After eating, I did some sit ups and push ups before my shower. Knowing Emmett, there might be a contest tomorrow – I needed to be prepared. I dried myself off and put on my flannel pajama bottoms before snuggling up in my queen-sized bed under the fluffy down comforter. Jasper was still in the other bathroom. . . doing what, I didn't know.

"Jasper, are you having happy time in there, or what?" I called loudly.

"Fuck off, Cullen. I have a skin-care regimen I need to follow. Just because you don't take care of your face, don't hate." He had some sort of mask on his face.

"What the hell is that - jizz?" I asked.

"It's an acne fighting cream, dickwad."

"You don't have acne."

"No shit, Sherlock. Do you think that's by fucking magic or something?"

"What happens if you don't use that stuff?"

"I don't want to know." I guess I couldn't blame him. Who wanted zits?

The next morning we slept in pretty late. We had an eleven o 'clock tee time so there was no need to rush. Jasper ordered some breakfast while I showered.

Emmett showed up in our room about ten thirty.

"I didn't pay for a suite, you moochers. This is nicer than mine," he complained.

"Jasper traded sexual favors for an upgrade," I smirked.

Emmett raised his eyebrows.

"Just harmless flirting."

"Well, that's a relief. I just saw two gorgeous girls that would be devastated if they found out their boyfriends were 'whoring' for hotel upgrades."

"You saw Bella and Alice?" I asked eagerly.

"Yeah. Damn, Edward. She's grown up since I saw her last spring - in all the right places. I can see why you're all emo about her."

"Please don't tell me you were checking her out."

"Nah, bro. Just the boobs. Verree nice."

I growled at my brother.

"Dude, Rose told me to. Don't get pissy. And Jasper, that little Alice is a hottie. I guess I don't need to buy you guys some hookers."

We both tackled him at that point. Well, we tried. He was in the NFL, after all.

"I was joking, you pansies. I'd never buy a hooker. You never pay for pussy. Well, unless you're marrying it." Emmett threw both of us aside with a flick of his wrist. "Fuck, you two are weak. We need to hit the gym."

Emmett drove the four of us to golf course. I was playing with Jasper against Emmett and my dad – we were well matched. Charlie wasn't a golfer, so he was going to meet us in the clubhouse after our round.

"Cheaters. You totally distracted me on that last shot," Emmett whined.

"My ass," Jasper retorted.

"You denying it, Whitlock?"

"No, I meant you were looking at my ass," Jasper joked as Emmett pelted him with a golf ball.

"Damn! That's going to leave a mark," he winced while he rubbed his thigh.

"Get Alice to kiss it and make it better," laughed Emmett. Jasper's eyes lit up at the thought. I couldn't blame him. The constant thoughts I had of Bella made me smile so much I looked goofy.

"Speaking of girlfriends, Edward, what's going on with you and Rosalie's sister? Your mother mentioned you were seeing her," my dad asked casually. I think he was trying not to freak me out. "What happened to that Tanya girl? You're not two-timing Bella, are you?"

"No dad, of course not. I broke up with Tanya. We didn't really have a relationship. It was more like an arrangement." I admitted, decidedly embarrassed in front of my dad and brother.

"Edward," he admonished, "please don't tell me you were using her for sex."

I stared at him, horrified at the thought. Jasper guffawed as he putted.

"Dad, I never touched her, I swear. She was just a friend to go places with."

"Yeah, dad, 'wittle' Eddie is still untouched. Your baby's still got his virtue," Emmett joked. I socked him in the arm. It was like hitting a brick wall. I did need to go to the gym.

"Uh, excellent. You know sex is not something to enter into lightly," my dad said uncomfortably. "Emmett, do you have any questions about tomorrow night? I want to make sure you're prepared." Emmett nearly fell over laughing. Jasper and I giggled like girls at the thought of Emmett needing sex advice. "You know it's not all about you, right? A real man pleases the woman. . . multiple times. Your mother loves it when I-"

"I think I've got it, pops," Emmett interrupted, thankfully. I didn't want to hear that, either.

"I am a doctor and your father. I can explain clitoral stimulation in detail, oral and manual."

Emmett started coughing uncontrollably. . . Jasper turned red. . . I wanted to disappear.

"I realize that you probably already had, um, relations," Dad went on, "but I feel I need to be available for you and Edward. And you too, Jasper. Not in a 'birds and bees' way. Just anyway you need me."

The three of us felt bad for laughing so hard. He was a fuckawesome father and was trying to have an open conversation with us. We were dicks.

"Dad, I'm sorry I laughed. I just got embarrassed," I said, properly chastised.

"Yeah, me too," Emmett added. "Although, I think you need to draw a diagram for Edward so he'll know where to put it."

I growled at my asshole brother. "Just because I'm not spending my teenage years as a man-whore doesn't mean I don't know what I'm doing."

"Whatever, Virginward. I saw the video."

"Fuck off, Emmett. Let's play golf."

"Hey, can you use a little less profanity, boys? Your mother would kick my ass if she knew I let you talk like that," Dad reprimanded us with a smile.

"Well, you can just dazzle her with your oral skills, Dr. C," Jasper teased. My dad high-fived him. Yuck. I needed that visual permanently erased.

"Hell yeah," my dad laughed. "So, what's this about a video, Edward?"

The golf game got competitive. I should have known. There was a lot a smack talking and side betting. It was with great satisfaction that Jasper and I won 200 bucks. It wasn't the money; it was beating my big brother who dominated every physical competition. Yeah, suck it, Emmett.

We drove to Emmett's house after we ate lunch at the club. I learned Charlie was a quiet man who didn't seem to mind that I was interested in dating his daughter. Yeah, Emmett let that nugget slip out during lunch. . .he was still irritated about losing. Fortunately, he had made such a good impression with the family that I didn't have to work very hard to gain Charlie's approval. Now I just needed Bella's. I really wanted to talk to her, but I was afraid if I called or texted her it might lead to a conversation as to where I was. I didn't want to open that line of conversation.

I had arranged for Emmett's favorite restaurant to host a full buffet at the house, complete with bartenders and servers. They were finishing the set-up when we got there.

"Fuck, yes!" Emmett exclaimed when he saw the food and the margarita machine. "Mexican, my favorite. Hook me up a margarita, amigo." He slurped from a giant salt-rimmed glass as he checked out the entertainment.

He was thrilled with my plans for the night. His greatroom was filled with two pool tables, vintage pinball machines, and various electric sports games. His large flat screen was ready to display a Rock Band battle.

"Everything looks great, Ed. Thanks for setting everything up." Emmett extended his hand to shake, but pulled me into a crushing clinch instead.

"It was nothing, Em. You know I'm really happy for you. Rosalie's a great girl."

"I know, so is Bella. Don't fuck it up."

Truer words had never been spoken.

We showered and got ready for the party. Jasper tried to dress me in one of his shirts, but I insisted on wearing my own clothes.

"You brought a garment bag, Jasper?" I said, poking the item in question.

"So?" he retorted. "Should I carry my clothes in a paper sack?"

"I was just asking. Don't get pissy because I won't let you dress me like a fucking boy band singer."

"Bite me, Cullen. I have better taste than that."

"That shirt was a reject from the N'Sync tour."

"The payback for that comment is going to be a bitch. You won't even know when it's coming," Jasper hissed.

"Well, I know it'll be coming from 1999. . . like that shirt."

Needless to say, Jasper was pissed at me. He was worse than a girl when it came to clothes. But after a while (and a few drinks), he stopped acting like an asshole.

Emmett's college friends and a few teammates had arrived, signaling the official beginning to the party. It wasn't a drunkfest, luckily. It was. . .mellow. Everyone seemed to enjoy the games and food. Carlisle and Charlie went back to the hotel after eating and playing several games of pool. Charlie had won quite a bit of money hustling Em's friends. Their departure triggered a change in the atmosphere.

"Ok, the geezers is gone. Where's the bitches at?"

These were his _college_ friends?

The mood changed from 'mellow' to 'Animal House' in a few poorly constructed sentences. Shots flowed freely. Porn replaced Rock Band.

Emmett grew progressively drunk as the night wore on. I, however, had not. I wisely had stuck to the margaritas. They hardly had any liquor in them at all. Snicker. I said 'lick her.'

"Hey, Jasper. Did you have a margarita? They're fucking delicious," I raved as I sucked another one down. "This party is super fun, huh?"

"Wait, can you repeat that? I didn't get that on video. I'm pretty sure that's going to be my new ringtone - Edward reciting lines from Legally Blonde - it _is_ the best party ever. Is everyone going to break into a choreographed dance sequence now?" Jasper looked gleeful.

The doorbell chimed "We are the Champions" and Jasper left to answer it. Mercifully. Why the fuck was he talking about dance numbers? I went for another margarita, and as I sipped, Emmett clapped his hand on my back. . . spilling my drink all over my shirt.

"Fuck!" It was completely soaked with frosty deliciousness.

"Sorry, bro. Just take it off."

I pulled my shirt over my head as I heard the opening riff to "Hot for Teacher."

Two blondes in glasses and tight skirts and way too much make-up started dancing. One grabbed Emmett and sat him in a chair. The other moved towards me.

"Ooh, baby. You already have your shirt off. What a good boy you are. I bet you're verrrreee good," she purred. Eeew. I don't do skank. She pawed at my chest, but I politely told her to give her venereal disease to someone else. She smelled all wrong – sour and cigarettes. Not like Bella, who smelled like spring and strawberry and lovely.

I went to the bar for a shot and another margarita to calm my nerves. Hmm. Maybe just one more shot. Shit, I splashed some on me. That glass had a leak. Why am I wet? Oh, I had no shirt.

I looked through Emmett's closet in order to rectify the clothing situation. None of his fit, so I had to wear one of Jasper's. Of course Jasper traveled with like 80 extra shirts. After pulling one on, I felt a little strange. I must be tired. I probably needed another drink to stay awake. Those margaritas are just like lemonade.

"Your crotch is ringing," the bartender commented. Yeah, I heard a chime coming from somewhere. Alarm clock? No. Doorbell? No. My pants. Oh, it _was_ my pants. I pulled out my phone to see who it was. Bella!

_Hey Edward I had a really weird sex dream and u were in it. _

_I dreamed of ur sch long_

WHAAAATTT? Sex dream. She dreamed of my what? I was so excited, my fingers quickly typed my reply.

_I love sweet Bella. I love that you dream of me._

Check out how romantic I am.

_What? You balls are sweaty? and you love it ? _

Why was she talking about my balls? They were not sweaty. Wait, she loves them or I love them? Oh, she's talking dirty to me. Eddie likes Dirty Bella. God, she's perfect.

_I love you Bella. Ur so hot_

Hell yeah, she's hot.

_U want me to touch ur balls. I lern howfrom james_

Fuck, she wants to touch my balls. That whole area is just for you, anytime, my love. My lovely, love. . . _who the hell is James_?

_Bye Edward. Can't wait to show you my new moves._

Oh yes, baby. Show me everything. I closed my eyes and pictured Bella. Bella's lips on mine. Her body pressed up against me. My fingers in her hair. My hands exploring every luscious curve and dip of her skin. My body hovering over her as we're about to. . .

"Fuck." That's not Bella's voice. I felt someone shaking me.

"Get up, Edward. How could a brother of mine be such a light weight?"

"I was having a really good dream, Emmett," I groaned and covered my face with a pillow.

"No shit. I got a boner just from your sleep talk."

"That's disturbing in so many ways. What's going on? Is the party over?"

"Yeah. You were asleep for the end of it. It was fucking epic, though. My friend Marcus ate whipped cream off the stripper's ass for a hundred bucks."

"Yuck. Who paid him to do that?"

"Paid _him_? He paid _her_, doofus. You are totally whipped on my little sis, huh?"

"Yeah, I am," I admitted. I sat up and immediately regretted it, as a wave of nausea hit me. "I can't stop thinking about her. I think I may love her."

"I know the feeling. Those Swan girls are irresistible."

"Yeah, but I've only known her for two weeks, and we haven't even been on a date."

"So? I took one look at Rose from across the lecture hall and I knew I was going to marry her. I'd never say it was too soon, bro."

"How are you so coherent, Emmett? You drank all day and night."

"You and Jasper are pussies," he spoke matter-of-factly.

"Who's a pussy?" Jasper walked into the room.

"Apparently you and I are."

"Fuck that. I just won a round of 'name that porn' while you were passed out. You are the only pussy around here." Jasper sat on the bed next to Emmett.

"For reals, Jasper? You beat Marcus?" Emmett fist bumped him. "Ok, just Ed-o is a pussy light weight. Now, can we get the hell out of here?"

"Hey!" I protested. "I didn't eat very much."

Another wave of nausea hit me and I groaned and pulled myself up to run and barf into the toilet.

"You were saying. . ." Emmett called from the bedroom.

We rode to the hotel in the limousine I had thoughtfully ordered to give the guys rides home. How did I know everyone would be drunk? Duh. It was a bachelor party.

"So why are you coming with us?" Jasper asked.

"I have to see Rosie. I want to try out my new haircut."

I looked at his hair – it was still curly and closely cropped as always. "It looks the same, Em."

"Not that hair, fool."

_What the fu_. . ."Aw shit, you shaved your balls?"

"Clean as a whistle. Rose doesn't like to get hair in her teeth, so I did it as a wedding present. And damn, my dong looks even bigger."

"Really. . . does it itch?" Jasper asked curiously.

"Am I really listening to this? I just puked my guts out and now I'm listening to my brother tell my best friend about his hairless balls and his big cock. Unbelievable."

"Your brother was in GQ. I think he might know what he's talking about."

"Whatever," I retorted petulantly. Not the best comeback. Yeah, so I was tired.

We arrived at the hotel before they could continue the ball story. I was looking forward to my nice, soft bed. The three of us rode the elevator to the top floor where the suites were located. I closed my eyes during the ride up and opened them when I heard the ding.

Wide, brown eyes stared at me.

"Edward?"

"Bella?"

She swayed and almost crumpled to the ground before I caught her. "Fuck! What the hell happened?" I scooped her up into my arms.

"Mmmm. Edward. You smell soooo good. I want to lick your neck," she murmured with her eyes still closed as she threw her arms around my head. She snuggled closer to me, her head buried in my neck. I could feel her tongue snaking out and dragging across my skin. I grinned like an idiot.

"Nice one, Ed. Chicks falling at your feet. . . begging to lick you. . .I guess you are my brother."

"She's drunk off her ass, Ed. I wonder what Alice is like," Jasper laughed.

"Allisss ish my besht friend," Bella slurred. She dropped her legs down, then tried to climb me like a tree, wrapping one leg around my waist then hopping up. I braced myself and shifted her into a comfortable position, smoothing her skirt down so she wasn't flashing Emmett and Jasper. She started working her tongue on my ear.

"You better get her to her room, quick." I gave Emmett a dirty look. "Dude, that's not what I meant. Take care of her."

She started wiggling and rocking against me. . . oh god. I almost jizzed in my pants.

"Hurry, Edward. It's disturbing to see my brother getting dry-humped in the hallway."

"Bella, baby, do you have your room key?" I whispered in her ear.

"Mmm. Yesh, let's go to my room, Edward. I want to show you what I did at the shpa. You can tell me if you like the way it feels."

Holy fuck. Jasper and Emmett were practically rolling with laughter down the hallway.

"Your key, Bella. Where is it?"

"My purth."

Jasper choked.

"Where, baby?" I asked frantically.

"I said 'my pursth.' The black leather one." Thank fuck.

Emmett opened the door of the suite with his key card.

"Yeah. Now I know why she was wandering in the hallway." Alice was sprawled upside down across the couch. Rose was dancing to . . . I don't know. . . music in her head? The whole place was a disaster. It was almost as bad as my house after the party.

Both Emmett and Jasper went quickly to check on their women, leaving me with Bella. I glanced around and quickly located a black purse on the bed. I checked the wallet and it was Bella's.

"I'm taking her to her room," I called out before we left, Bella still wrapped around me like a koala bear. A fucking hot, grinding koala bear trying to seduce me. I gently pulled her legs down and spun her to my side.

We rode down in the elevator, her body still torturing me. She was pressed firmly against me with her hands reaching under my shirt. With every pass of her hand across my abs, she was making little moaning sounds that were driving me insane. The elevator opened and we walked down the hall to her room.

"Edward, this is the best dream ever. I don't want to wake up." Her eyes were open and her face was lit up with an amazing smile.

"Just go to sleep, love." I sat her on the bed and removed her shoes. She pulled me down with her, but I sat up quickly. "No, Bella. You need to sleep." I tucked her in, knowing anything I did I would regret – no matter how badly I wanted her. We would have plenty of chances to be together. I leaned down to press an innocent kiss to her lips. She wound her fingers in my hair and tugged me closer to her, trying to hitch her leg around my hip. "Bella, you're making it very hard to control myself."

"You don't have to, Edward. In my dreams we have lots and lots of sex."

I really needed to get the hell out of here, like now. "Go to sleep, baby."

"OK, but jusht tell me. . . Edward, why are you dressed like Jushtin Timberlake?"

A/N

So, in an effort to raise my review total, I have shamelessly resorted to using my friend's popularity for my gain. So I am sharing my late night text messages with Cosmo. Don't roll your eyes.

Marvar - You're pretty awesome. I want to form a super fic crew with you. I just need to be more popular. I do have like 60 more fans now. Maybe I'll get 30 reviews. LOL

_Cosmogirl7481 - You got 60 adds? That is awesome!_

Marvar - Not compared to your like five thousand. I'm not jealous, though. *bitch*

_Cosmogirl7481 - We're a team! There's no *bitch* in team! LMAO_

Marvar - So, Cosmo, I guess I owe you big time for that review in the Fictionators on Friday.

_Cosmogirl7481 - You owe me nothing. I owe you far more. Trust me. _

_Okay. You do owe me…clit licks and boob gropes. They're like my currency._

Marvar - Hey. This is our A/N discussion. Write a pithy comment.

_Cosmogirl7481 - You want me to be succinct? I'm pretty wordy._

Marvar - This isn't a lemon, Cosmo. LOL. I'm the succinct to your wordy. Maybe that's why the increase in popularity?

_Cosmogirl7481 - Well, that and all the boys found out that we fuck under the bleachers. That always makes you more "popular"._

Marvar - Cosmo, under your tutelage, I've progressed from teenage longing to BJ tutorials and grinding. Have any comments?

_Cosmogirl7481 - Yes. Blow Jobs are ALWAYS preferable to longing._

Marvar - Am I really putting this into my A/N?

_Cosmogirl7481 - Of course you are! We are being witty._

Marvar - I think I can write drunk scenes because I'm totes fucked up when I write!

_Cosmogirl7481 - I think you can write drunk scenes because you have experience._

Marvar - Yeah. The horny grinding part. LOL.

_Cosmogirl7481 - Horny grinding when you're drunk is the best part!_

Marvar - I know, huh? I wish I was Bella in that chapter.

_Cosmogirl7481 - I wish I was Bella in any chapter of any fic…except that one where she got raped by Carlisle. *shudders*_

Marvar - Eew. You just killed my buzz.

_Cosmogirl7481 - It was supposed to make you laugh darkly. LOL_

Yes. Longest chapter and longest A/N ever.

Review, even if it's just a plea to stop our "cute" banter.


	20. Ch 20 White Wedding

**A/N **

Sorry for the wait - I've been busy writing a new story with CosmoGirl7481 called "Love in My Box." You can find it under my profile.

I don't own Twilight or Sixteen Candles, but Cosmo owns me.

* * *

This chapter is dedicated to Anna, who taught me many important life lessons such as how to be a woman. . .

**Chapter 20**

**White Wedding**

". . . birthday dear Bella, happy birthday to youuuuuuu. " Alice sang while holding out a muffin with a candle sticking out the top.

"Bella!"

"What? I was in the middle of the best dream." I groaned and rolled over.

"Yeah, I bet I know what that was about. Or should I say _who_? Do I have to hear every little detail of your dream sex life, sleep talker? Although, it sounded pretty hot."

"Yeah. It was awesome." I thought back to last night's dream. Edward - his arms wrapped around me. Edward - his scent, his face, his body so close to mine. The grinding against his rock hard body. Jesus, I hoped his real abs were as awesome as his dream ones - 'cos you could grate cheese on _those_ puppies.

"Mmmmm."

"Are you moaning, young lady? You better start talking." She sat on my bed and stared.

"It was just a good dream, Alice." I covered my face with the pillow.

"Well, I hope you remember it so you can do it in real life."

"Yeah right. I don't think I could do that, Alice." _I wish_. I inhaled and said, "Well, it sure was vivid, though. I can almost smell him." I rubbed my face into my pillow as I stretched lazily across the comfy bed.

"Hey, that dream was about Edward, right? Because you kept saying something about Justin Timberlake."

"Waaaahhhhttt? That part I do not recall." I shot up rapidly – too rapidly.

I felt a sharp ache in my head as I tried to sit up. I noticed Alice was still holding the muffin. "Thanks, Alice. You are probably the only one who will remember." I took the offering from Alice's hands and lay back down.

"Alice, how are you so chipper this morning? My head is killing me."

"I wasn't the one drinking all night," she said.

"So you were sober when you were riding the strippers like horses?"

She gave me a dirty look.

"That's what I thought," I replied smugly.

"Whatever, Bella. At least I wasn't as bad as Rosalie."

_Rosalie! _

"Oh fuck."

I scrambled up to get dressed quickly. I had to find out if she was ok. Alice must have sensed my panic.

"Relax, Bella. Rose is alright. Emmett came by last night to check on her. He put her to bed."

I breathed a sigh of relief.

"I'm going to take a shower then we can talk," Alice warned. "You _will _tell me about that dream." She closed the door behind her and I went back to fantasizing in my dream world.

Yum.

Licking his neck. Slightly salty, but fresh and soapy and. . . delicious. I had wanted to bite him.

My legs wrapped around him, no space between our bodies. . . His hands cupping the backs of my thighs as he held me tightly. Jesus. Must not touch myself while Alice is in the other room. Remembering the dream was making me pant. What would I do in real life? Hyperventilate?

I was distracted from my perverted thoughts by Alice's emergence from the shower - bright and perky as usual. I'm sure I looked like roadkill. I dragged myself from my comfy bed and my Edward fantasies to shower.

"I'm still going to interrogate you about that dream," she sang in her infuriatingly chipper voice as she got ready to go.

I sighed as I resigned myself to the inevitable inquisition. "It's not really that exciting," I lied.

"Don't even, Bella. It'll just have to wait until our hair appointment. I'm really hoping it's about a three-way with you, Edward, and Justin."

After my shower we walked over to Rosalie's suite. Alice grabbing an extra key card last night turned out to be a good thing, since Rosalie wasn't answering. She used it to let us in the room.

"Oh. My. God. Did we do this?"

My jaw dropped open in shock. Everything was . . . everywhere. Plates, couch cushions, glasses . . . underpants? Yeah, I didn't want to know.

"Rose?" I called out into the suite.

"Huh?" The answer sounded more like a moan.

It wasn't coming from the bedroom, however.

Walking towards the source of the noise, I realized it was from the bathroom.

Rose was naked in the tub - hair completely wild and probably still drunk. Nice. I groaned in frustration. Where was the wedding photographer when I needed him? This needed to go into the Swan family scrapbook.

Rose made a sound like a wounded cow. Well, maybe the sound didn't exist in nature.

Alice gigglesnorted.

I started to laugh, too. I couldn't help it.

"Get up, alkie." I poked her in the side, trying not to touch her girlie parts.

"Mmmph," she grunted as she tried to roll over.

"Rose. You are getting married in six hours. You need to get up."

No movement, except for the middle finger she held up in my direction.

I raised my eyebrows and cocked my head towards the shower nozzle.

"Oh yeah," Alice replied with a gleam in her eye.

I smiled and nodded. I turned that knob full power.

After several minutes of screaming and crying, (Rose and I screamed, Alice cried - Rose gave her a titty-twister) we got Rose showered and dressed.

She was hurting pretty bad, though. She had a lump on the back of her head and a killer hangover. She took some aspirin, but it didn't seem to help. During breakfast, she looked completely wrecked.

When we came back from our hair appointment at the salon, I realized that I needed to do something to help – her situation had not improved. I snapped my fingers as I came up with an idea - Grandma Swan had some pain pills for her lumbago.

I ran up to my grandma's room and emerged victorious, pills in hand.

Grandpa said it was "the good stuff."

Of course they fucking forgot my birthday. I thought they lived for that shit. I was so mistaken.

I handed Rose the small container of pills, and she quickly gulped some with a bottle of water.

"How many did you take?" I gasped.

"Three or four."

"What the hell, Rose? Do you want to spend the day in the hospital getting your stomach pumped?"

"Oh, relax drug police. I needed some painkillers, bad. That aspirin I took earlier didn't do shit. Things have to be perfect today. I've been dreaming about this day since I was five years old." Could I argue with that logic?

The pills seemed to be working well as the three of us got ready in her suite. Thankfully, housekeeping had cleaned up while we were gone. She wasn't even complaining any more. She seemed. . . happy? Maybe too happy? Nah, it was her wedding day.

My mother and Esme stopped in to check on how we were doing. They were already dressed and ready to leave for the church. They were going to check on the arrangements.

Rose was almost ready since her hair and make-up was done at the salon. She emerged from her room, slightly wobbly. Her dress looked incredible. I had seen pictures before, but in person, on my sister it was breathtaking. It was silk- strapless with a fitted bodice, and a long, full mermaid skirt. She looked like a princess.

"Hey, Mom! Esmom! How's it hanging?" She snorted loudly. "I just snorted."

And the fun began.

My mom and Esme looked at me and I just shook my head. "She took some pain killers," I explained. "She was feeling really bad earlier."

"Bad, I'm bad, you know it…I'm bad, I'm bad, you know it, come on," she sang loudly and tried to moonwalk. For the encore, she grabbed her crotch.

Alice was rolling on the floor laughing. Literally. She couldn't stand up. My mother and Esme looked concerned for a moment, and then started giggling.

"What the hell kind of pills did she take?" my mother asked with tears of laughter in her eyes.

"I, uh, got some from Grandma."

"Grandma Marie? Jesus, Bella, that old lady pops pills like candy. She's high half the time, and completely shit-faced the other half. She probably gave you something illegal." My mother gave me the 'I'm disappointed in you, Bella' look. Happy birthday to me.

"Hey, I was just trying to make your hung-over daughter feel better on her wedding day," I huffed, trying to defend myself.

"Hung-over? Weren't you supposed to keep her from getting drunk, Isabella Marie?" Oh, shit. The middle name. I was screwed.

Rose was taking a break from her singing to stare at her hand. She was waving it like a psychotic Miss America.

"I'm sure everything will be fine, Renee," Esme said softly as she smiled at me. Lucky Rosalie would have a great mother-in-law. Emmett, on the other hand, was in for a world of crazy. I wonder if he knew about my mom's obsession with Carlisle.

"It's going to be a piece of cake, Ren," Rose sang as she tried to snap her fingers.

"Ok, well, we're leaving with the grandparents and Daddy to the church. I expect you to be on time. You have a half hour." My mom walked out shaking her head, while Esme winked.

I turned to Alice, "Help me get her veil and shoes on so we can go."

It was like dressing a two-year old. She kept going limp like a rag doll even on the way down to the limo. We shoved her in and rode to the church just in time.

"Oh, Izzy, You're going to love Em's brother. And he's so crazy for you! _Touch him once and you'll know it's true. . . He never wanted anyone like this. . . It's all brand new, you'll feel it in his kiss. . .He's crazy for you, crazy for you__ Bellaaaah. . ."_

"Yeah, thanks, Rose," I muttered. _Don't remind me of that stupid date. How the hell was I supposed to explain that to Edward?_

Alice helped me get her out of the limo and into the bride's room without much of a problem. We each carried one side of Rose.

"It's got to be wearing off, right? I mean it's been like over an hour since she took them," I breathed hopefully.

Alice shrugged. "Hell if I know." We sat down, exhausted. I mean, Rose wasn't fat by any means, but boobs like that aren't feather-light.

Rose was still for a bit, which I took as a good sign. We were just waiting for the signal from the wedding planner. We heard a knock at the door and my dad came in to escort her down the aisle. He looked at Rose, who was staring blankly at the flower arrangement on the table, then at he turned to me, eyes questioning.

"Um, she's a little bit nervous, Dad. She's not really herself." That was an understatement. But I didn't think 'hey, Daddy, your mom got Rose all fucked up' was the appropriate response. "We'll see you out there." Alice and I practically ran out to the entrance to the church. She grinned at me, saying, "Remember, everything that happened was for a reason. Please just go with it." She then went in to take her seat.

_OK? What was that about?_

I lined up at the end of the procession, standing by myself because my partner was inside with Emmett. Since we didn't have a rehearsal, I didn't ever actually meet Emmett's brother, who was to be my partner. I didn't even know his name. That was strange, but I hadn't thought about it before now. Whatever. Too late now. It was actually easier to get out of the date, since I didn't know him.

The bridesmaids were all lined up, looking beautiful in their red gowns. My dress was actually really great - flattering to my figure, much to my surprise. I thought maybe Rose would be petty enough to want to outshine everyone at her wedding, but it was not the case. We all looked better because of her. Even completely high, Rose was more beautiful than anyone had a right to be.

Our Dad held her tightly as she swayed on the spot. The music started and the procession began. The sounds of Pachelbel's Canon lilted through the foyer. It was magnificent. Behind me, I could hear my dad urging her to go, go. Wrong choice of words.

It inspired her to start a cheer.

"Go, Huskies, Go!"

She continued with her chant down the aisle. I bet my dad was glad he spent all that money on gymnastics and cheer uniforms.

"Yay, Emmett!" She landed in the splits. It was fortunate that her dress had a full skirt or she'd be pretty embarrassed right now.

Booming laughter filled the church. It came from one person – everyone else was collectively holding their breath.

"That's my girl! Look how lucky I am. Did you see how flexible she is?" Emmett clapped his hands together. "Damn, baby. I love you."

**EPOV**

"Edward, earth to Edward."

"Wha?" The complete word could not form in my cotton-filled mouth. I lay with a pillow covering my face.

"You really shouldn't drink so much." Jasper sounded too damned happy.

"Fuck off." I sat up slightly, removing the pillow and rubbing my eyes.

"Nice manners, loverboy." He swatted me with the pillow. "Did Boozy Bella puke on you before you got to first base and now you're all wound up?"

"First of all, don't call her that or I'll kick your ass. Secondly, get the fuck off my bed with your pillow-fighting shit. This is not a low budget girl-on-girl porn." I grabbed the pillow and tossed it across the room.

"Testy. You need to go rub one out in the shower." He made a motion with his hand.

"You better not be offering me assistance with that," I answered in disgust.

"You wish. But these fingers are only for Alice's pleasure," he said smugly, wiggling the offending digits in front of my face.

"Ugh. I want to throw up again. That's so wrong." I slapped his disgusting hand away from my face.

"Dude, I was just messing with you. I'd never disrespect Alice by telling you about _that_. Damn, you're uptight. You do need handle your business in the shower. Twice, or you might pop off like a champagne cork at the wedding when you see Bella." He got up from the bed and walked into the living room.

I wanted to yell some choice expletives at him in protest, but he was completely right. I had morning wood that could only be attributed to last night's. . . encounter with Bella. Holy fuck, had she driven me crazy. I had never been so horny in my life. It was good to know that I had that kind of self-control. I could never hurt her by taking advantage of the situation.

My shy, beautiful girl was wild when she got drunk. I recalled the feel of her skin against mine – so soft and warm and sweet-smelling. I groaned at the thought of her licking my neck with her hot, wet tongue. Resisting as she tried to pull me on top of her had been my greatest feat of strength, ever. I held her until she feel asleep, listening to her moan and say my name. It was almost as bad as the grinding. Almost.

I rolled out of bed knowing I needed to take Jasper's advice and not wanting to do it while he was so near. Jasper knocked and walked in as I gathered my things for the shower. I pulled my shirt off and threw it at his face.

"Thanks for that, by the way. Bella took one look at it and swore she'd never drink again. She thought she had traveled back in time to when that shirt was in style."

"You're going to pay for your comments, Cullen. Now hurry the fuck up so we can eat. Emmett just texted that he'll be here in twenty. Can you get pretty that quickly? I know it takes hours to get that 'just got laid' look to your hair that all the ladies love, but we don't have the time."

"Why am I friends with you? Please remind me. And it takes two minutes to fix my hair, unlike your flat-iron using ass."

We finished getting dressed fairly quickly considering with whom I was sharing a room. I fully expected Jasper to pull out a make up bag.

Emmett arrived just before Jasper and I started to argue seriously. He looked perfect, not even a hint of a hangover, of course.

I felt like I had been on a two-week drinking binge and needed rehab.

We had breakfast at the buffet. Emmett said he needed to 'increase his stamina' tonight so he was carbo-loading.

"So, little bro, what's the plan for you and your lady?" Emmett asked between mouthfuls of pancakes.

"Yeah, do you have a plan B in case she gets pissed?" Jasper asked, concerned. "I told you how I feel about this whole thing."

"I - fuck - ahhh," I stuttered incoherently at the thought of something going wrong. I didn't mean for this whole date thing to get out of hand. I just wanted her to like me for me and not as Emmett's brother. Now I just had to hope for the best.

"No, you better not be fucking. She's a nice girl and you need to keep it in your pants. There's other stuff you can do, though," Emmett retorted.

"That's not what I meant, douche. I wouldn't ever treat Bella that way."

"Maybe some third base action, just don't slide home." I cringed at his baseball metaphor. I would be lying if I said I didn't think of doing everything with Bella, but I was completely respectful of her. Too respectful. So much so my balls were as blue as those weird computer aliens in Avatar.

"Are you listening, Pervward? Just up to the knuckle." Emmett's voice caught my attention. Apparently he had been talking the whole time. About what, I was scared to ask. But I couldn't help it.

"Knuckle? What the hell are you talking about?" He opened his mouth to speak, but I stopped him. "Never mind. I don't want to know."

"This is valuable advice, Ward-o. I could charge for this shit."

"Seriously, Ed, he knows his stuff. He told me about this move and Alice fucking meowed or something when I tried it on her. It was incredible."

I had lost all patience with the stupid nicknames and sex advice. It was completely unnecessary since I wasn't about to have any of either! "Why the fuck does everyone have to make up nicknames for me? My name is Edward! I don't have a plan B and I don't need advice to kiss my girlfriend or whatever!" I huffed and threw my fork down on the table.

"See. Completely sexually frustrated. He's even getting a frown line between his eyebrows." Emmett ignored me and spoke to Jasper. "He's going to blow like Vesuvius just from touching her."

"Yeah, it's going to get messy," Jasper agreed. "I told him to whack off in the shower, but he doesn't listen."

"Et tu, Jasper?" I shook my head sadly.

"Save the nerdy foreign language shit for Bella. Chicks dig that. Although you may want to go with French."

Fuck my life.

Jasper (aka the traitor) and I got our clothes from our suite and left with Emmett to his house to get ready for the ceremony. The cleaning crew had already taken care of the mess from last night's festivities and I was glad I didn't have to see another margarita. We had plenty of time so we played some pool. We dressed quickly (well, not Jasper) and when it was time, we gathered at the bar for a drink.

"To Emmett - infinite love and happiness," I raised my glass and the three of us clinked them together.

"To an incredible honeymoon and infinite orgasms," Jasper added. Emmett fist bumped him.

We left for the church somewhat early so I could check out the piano for my part of the ceremony. Everything was satisfactory, so I played a few songs while we waited. The guests seemed to enjoy the music and it helped to pass the time. While playing, I noticed one of the bridesmaids kept staring at me. She was giving me the look - 'I'm available for your pleasure.' I was uncomfortable at the thought. Even if I weren't with Bella, what would I do with a college girl? Um, scratch that. I knew what to do; I just wasn't interested.

Finally, everyone got in their places and it was time to start.

My fingers glided over the piano keys, effortlessly playing the traditional wedding song by Pachelbel. Yeah, this was the last of the 'normal' songs I would be playing for my dear brother. The reception would be interesting considering his choice of dedication to Rosalie. I laughed to myself at the thought of singing _that_ later. Mom was going to have a shit attack.

I sat on the piano bench watching the procession, anxiously awaiting Bella. Now I would find out if I had made a mistake in not telling her about Emmett and the wedding. I watched the bridesmaids march in and the one that was eye-fucking me earlier continued with her ocular assault. Then time fucking stopped along with my breathing as I saw _her_ in that red dress looking perfect, amazing. . .edible. My sweet birthday girl. My heart swelled at the thought of her being mine and my plans for our first date. It lasted for only a brief moment because a commotion broke me from my reverie. Holy shit, Rosalie was yelling some cheer about Emmett as she walked up the aisle. Her dad looked uncomfortable, Bella looked sheepish, and Emmett looked turned on. It figures. He wasn't exactly shy.

Rose's big finale was to land in the splits, to which Emmett responded by cheering her on. Perfect couple. He helped her up from the floor and Bella smoothed out her dress. I took my place next to Emmett when I finished the song.

Bella still had not looked at me, even though I had not broken my gaze from her. She kept staring at Rose, I assume, hoping to stem any further outbursts. Rose, however, became instantly serene when Emmett took her hand. He was like the 'drunk whisperer.' Bella seemed satisfied - her eyes scanned the room, looking everywhere until they finally settled on me.

A beautiful smile began to form, followed by surprise; then anger flooded her face. She scowled at me, mouthing 'you liar' and turning away.

Yeah, I was screwed.

And not in the good way.

**End Notes**

This chapter was hard for me to write. I want to thank my dear friend Cosmo for coaxing the words out of me. She is the reason I have a chapter at all. All my love goes to this wonderful person who occupies a huge portion of my heart (and my iPhone).

If you like this chapter, feel free to review. I appreciate every single one.

* * *

Bye, Grams. Have fun up there with Grandpa.


	21. Ch 21 Please Don't Go Girl

A/N

Yes. It is a new chapter. Sorry about the long wait. I was seriously blocked, and I could only hear Forthwithward from Love in My Box in my ear. My partner in crime, Cosmogirl7481, brought out the whip and made me write this chapter. I owe her everything, but I pay her in text messages and inappropriate emails. Thank you, Cosmo. You make all of this so much more fun.

**Chapter 21 **

**Please Don't Go Girl**

Edward. He was here looking impossibly gorgeous in a tux. My first reaction was elation but it quickly turned to anger. He was Emmett's "superhot" brother. The hottie best man that all of Rose's friends wanted. Freaking fantastic. I had a blind date with my almost boyfriend. And everyone knew but me. This birthday kept getting shittier and shittier. The universal betrayal just made it more vivid.

"You liar," I muttered under my breath as I looked toward the front of the church and away from the pack of phonies that were my sister and friends. His emerald eyes had looked hopeful, and then devastated as I turned away from him.

The ceremony began and all I could think of was the events of the past weeks. What an excellent Maid of Honor! I hadn't heard one word of the ceremony. I didn't feel too guilty since obviously Rose and Emmett knew what was going on between us. But I didn't understand _why_ they would do it. There was nothing to gain for anyone. How did I miss this?

I was obviously missing some details.

I could feel Edward's burning gaze on me, but I didn't reciprocate. I refused to look at him until finally, mercifully, the ceremony was over. I guess it was nice. I'm sure my mom would make watch the video 500 times, so it wasn't a total loss. The procession started to exit the church and it was time to deal with Edward. I ventured a glance at him. Big mistake. That boy was lethal in a tuxedo. He peered at me anxiously through his thick fringe of lashes. He reached for my arm and tucked it through the crook of his elbow. His eyes never left mine until he whispered in my ear, "Baby, please don't be angry. Give me a chance to explain. Please, Bella?" Oh my god, he was so close. His Edwardy smell was killing me. I remember the last time he touched me, in the gym. How had everything gone to shit in three days?

Crap. How can I stay mad at that? Oh, right - minor detail - he conveniently didn't tell me that his brother was marrying my sister.

"Not now, Edward. Please, just back off," I whispered to him. He sighed quietly in response.

I searched for Alice in the crowd and I saw her with Jasper. Of course he was there, too. She was beaming and clutching Jasper tightly. I would talk with her later. So much for "chicks before dicks."

I guess I was alone in this.

I could feel Edward still staring at me as we walked together out of the church. I avoided his gaze as I greeted the rest of my family. He reluctantly walked away to presumably congratulate his family.

I needed to think. Without fuckhot boys in tuxedos batting their eyelashes at me.

We took pictures (of course) following the ceremony. I avoided looking at him throughout the process. It wasn't that awkward until Edward and I had to take a picture together.

"Oh, look how adorable they are together!" my mom exclaimed as I groaned inwardly. "I can see where Bella and Rosalie get their beauty, Mrs. Swan," kiss-ass Edward said as he grinned and winked at my mother who ate that up with a spoon. Thanks, mom. Way to fraternize with the enemy. We stood together while our moms discussed green-eyed babies with chestnut hair. "God, I hope the baby looks like his Grandpa Cullen," my mother cooed and winked at Edward's dad. I'm pretty sure she'd swap Charlie for any of the Cullen/McCarty men.

Like I said, not awkward at all.

I drove over to the reception with my mom and dad. I had texted Alice that I was going with them. She would probably go with Jasper anyway. I really didn't want to talk to anyone – I just wanted to process what happened. Sitting in the car, listening to my mom rave about how lovely the ceremony was, I realized that I wasn't really mad at Edward - I overreacted to the situation.

Well, I am only 17 after all.

I needed to talk to Edward and clear everything up.

When we got to the hotel, everything was so chaotic I didn't get a chance to talk to him. It was a series of congratulatory hugs and receiving lines, and we never got a chance to speak or even make eye contact until dinner. We only made small talk however, since we didn't have any privacy. I tried not to stare too much at his perfect face, because I couldn't stop thinking about his lips on mine. Gah. . . those lips. Is it possible to have a spontaneous orgasm from staring at someone's mouth? I think I came a little bit. Well, not really. But it was kinda tingly down there.

Dinner ended and we started the traditional wedding activities. Emmett and Rose cut the cake, and did the garter and bouquet toss. One of my cousins caught the bouquet and looked thrilled to dance with Emmett's football teammate that caught the garter. I sat around bored, not even seeking out Alice. I should've brought my iPhone. At least I could have read some Harry Potter fanfiction.

I saw Edward walk toward the microphone and I knew it was time for the toast. My stomach fluttered as I waited anxiously to hear his voice.

"Good evening, everyone. I'm Emmett's little brother, Edward. Of course, next to Emmett, everyone is little. I'm 6' 2" and I still look up to him in more ways than one. Emmett is the brother that everyone wishes they had. He taught me about hard work, competition, and even girls."

"No, that was me, son!" my dad shouted out to laughs from the crowd. Emmett leaned over to fist bump our dad.

"As I was saying. . . Emmett will also be the husband that every woman wishes they had. And he is very lucky to have found his other half in Rosalie. I know how much he loves her and I hope that someday I can have a love like theirs." As he said these words, he gazed at me longingly. I wanted to grab him and say, 'Yes, please.' He continued with his speech, "Please raise your glass and toast to Emmett and Rosalie, may their love always burn bright, steady, and true."

The crowd cheered and 'awwed' as they all embraced and then everyone waited expectantly for the first dance. I just sighed and thought about how hot Edward was and how his speech made him even more attractive. I didn't think that was possible. I needed to talk to him. Crap. I didn't see where he went.

Then I felt hot breath in my ear, and a hand at my waist. The scent was unmistakable. Edward. "Bella. I know you're mad at me right now but I'm about to do something and I want to explain first. The song is for Rosalie from Emmett, but I'll be thinking only about you." With that, he released me and walked over to the piano at the front of the hall where Emmett was waiting with a seated Rosalie. I was so surprised that I couldn't even say a word to him.

"And now the groom has a special dedication to the bride. He's accompanied by his brother, Edward, the best man, on piano," the band's lead singer announced to a round of applause and some catcalls. Damn slutty bridesmaids. He gave the mic to Emmett and Edward sat at the piano.

"This is for my beautiful bride Rose. This song encapsulates my feelings for her. Baby, I mean every word." Emmett looked totally sincere and loving. Wow, I wonder what sappy love ballad he was going to sing?

"To the tick tock, you don't stop, Oooh oo-ooh ooh ooh." Emmett crooned into the mic. Edward's cheeks turned pink as he grinned and sang back up. Damn, he looked hot as he played, long fingers stroking the keys. Ahhh!

Want. Those. Fingers. Everywhere.

Wait, oh my god. He's not singing THAT song. I glanced at Rosalie who was in a trance. I think she wanted to eat Emmett. Yeah, she probably would later.

I was torn, it was such a craptastic song – but Emmett and Edward singing it made it hot. Seriously.

"_I've been waiting all night _

_so just let me hold you close to me _

'_Cuz I've been dying for you girl. . .to make love to me. . ." _

Edward stared right at me while he sang the background vocals in a smoldering voice.

Yes, I was a puddle of Bella.

"_Girl you make me feel real good,_

_We can do it till we both wake up _

_Girl you know I'm hooked on you _

_and this is what I'll do. . ."_

Emmett was on his knees before Rosalie. He actually had a very pleasant singing voice. Big sister scored on all counts.

But Edward. . . his voice was liquid sex. . . his eyes were blazing. . .I think he may have started a small fire in my underpants.

"_Make sweet lovin' all night long... _

_Feels so right it can't be wrong... _

_Don't be shy girl rescue me... _

_Open up your heart and I'll set you free..."_

Well, I think the rush of moisture put out the fire.

EPOV

So, not the best idea I ever had. To be fair, it wasn't a plan to not tell her, it just happened that way. By the time I found out, it was too late. When she looked at me with the angry eyes, I was devastated. I didn't want her to think that I was a liar. I wasn't. I knew that I needed to explain.

I stared at her throughout the ceremony, hoping to trade glances with her – wanting to see her cherry lips curl into a smile. Yeah, not so much.

I should have listened to Jasper. That was one sentence never uttered before. The only thing worse than Jasper's taste in clothes was his advice about women. Remember the whole "Alice was a boy" debacle? Who could forget that? When I'm ninety I'm going to bring that shit up.

Bella completely ignored me the entire ceremony. It was like she had tuned me out. I moved through the paces of my best man duties with a sigh and sense of woe. Great brother, Edward. It's Emmett's day and you are whining like a bitch. Take control of this situation, dumbass. She looked at me finally as we were exiting. I pulled her closer by tucking her arm in mine. Still not close enough.

"Baby, please don't be angry. Give me a chance to explain. Please, Bella?" I said desperately.

"Not now, Edward. Please, just back off," she replied in a whisper, making my heart plummet. I sighed again, frustrated and upset at my mistake. I needed to fix this shit right quick, and she wasn't cooperating. How the hell do you break up when you are not even officially together? Apparently Edward 'Fucking Fail' Cullen is tops at everything.

We walked out of the church and I reluctantly let go of her to talk to my family. I shook Emmett's hand and hugged the parents, then went to find Jasper. I found him surgically attached to Alice.

"Jasper, I-" I started to speak, but he interrupted me.

"Am totally fucked," he finished for me.

"How did you know?" I asked, rubbing my eyes and hoping that I was dreaming this shit.

"It was pretty clear the way she looked at you. Normally she's all swoony," Alice chimed in. "I know my best friend. I hoped that she wouldn't react this way, but she's really embarrassed right now. She probably thinks we all knew and were keeping a secret on purpose."

"Um, yeah, we kinda were," I said in a snotty voice.

"Edward, I promise she's not really mad. She just needs time." Jasper kissed Alice's fingers that were twined with his as she spoke. My frustration subsided enough to appreciate my best friend's obvious happiness. I wasn't jealous at all, even though my brother just married the love of his life and Jasper found his other half. I just wanted my girl back, or wherever she was before this shit hit the fan.

"Can you guys help me with something? I planned something for our 'date' tonight, and I really want it to be special," I shared my ideas with the two of them. Alice was nearly beside herself, squealing and 'ahhhing' to basically everything. She pitched a few details herself, which were excellent suggestions. "Let's finish this discussion in the car. I have to take pictures. Alice, are you coming with us?" Yeah, like she was going to let go of Jasper. She laughed in response. Jasper took my keys and sauntered away with his arms wrapped around his girl.

"You better not sully the integrity of my vehicle!" I shouted after him. I think he said 'someone needed to,' but I'm not certain. Dick.

Bella ignored me as I suffered through photographs and having to listen to our moms talk about the pretty babies we'd have. Yeah, Mrs. Swan, my dick isn't _THAT_ long (but it's up there). Your daughter will have to let me get near her to make some babies. I smiled and made nice with Bella's mom. I complemented her like my dad always taught me. Well, she was a very attractive woman. It was good to know that if I married Bella someday she would still look hot in twenty years.

Bella left with her parents quickly and without a word to me. I walked to the lot alone and feeling shitty.

Oh, Bella. I'm sorry. Please give me a chance. I had the words if she just chose to listen.

OK, now I just needed her.

I walked through all of the paces and fulfilled my obligations as best man. I dutifully sat by Bella at dinner, wishing we were together. She said a few polite words to me, nothing to make me think that I had a chance. Great. I made my toast to the happy couple and saw my mom tear up. She loves that sappy stuff. I stared at Bella, trying to give her a hint as I was taking about love and stuff.

And then it was time for Emmett's and my little performance. I still could not believe that I was doing this shit. I really should thank fuck that I convinced him that the choreography he wanted to do would be cheesy (that shit wasn't happening). I must really love my big bro because this song. . . I mean, couldn't he just pick a normal song, like something by Celine Dion? Well, on second thought. . .

Before joining Emmett, I walked toward her with confidence. It was now that I was making my move. Last time I came up behind her to surprise her was pretty fucking great. Remember the gym thing? If not, it's on the internet.

I leaned in close and held her by the waist. "Bella. I know you're mad at me right now but I'm about to do something and I want to explain first. The song is for Rosalie from Emmett, but I'll be thinking only about you," I whispered in her ear and felt her shiver. I reluctantly let her go and made my way to the piano and Emmett. It was go time.

"Play that piano good, bro," Emmett said as I sat down.

"Well," I hissed.

"Well, what?" he asked.

"Play well," I groaned.

"Dick. I know. I fucking graduated. I just like messing with you. You get all pissy when I use improper grammar. Your nostrils flare and you sigh, all annoyed and shit. It's hilarious. There. Just like that," he says as I do exactly as he said. Apparently my reactions are predictable. Nice. I hate when Emmett is right. He's always getting the best of me.

The announcer finished whatever he was saying, and then it was our turn. Damn, it would be funny if Rose hated this song. But I knew she didn't. Emmett had told me that they danced to it on their first date and it was their special song. He sang it in her ear and they practically dry humped on the dance floor. I didn't need to hear that last part, but Emmett wasn't known for his modesty.

Emmett turned to Rosalie and dedicated the song to her. The way she looked at him made me sure that if Emmett sang the ABCs, she'd still rock his world later.

I wondered if Bella has that same look.

I guess she'd have to actually look at me for me to find out. Well, here goes plan B.

So I played. And sang. And, she looked at me with a dazed expression. Is that good? At least she was looking, right?

I was slightly embarrassed to sing this song, but I think it worked. She looked kind of flushed and her eyes were boring into me. And, oh hell yes! She just licked her lips. I kept staring at her, trying to communicate my feelings for her through eye contact or mental telepathy or something because I was desperate by this point.

I was on the last of my "ooh oo ooh oos" and Bella was swaying with her mouth slightly open and her eyes glassy. Her hand was splayed across her throat and she never looked hotter. I smiled as the song came to an end and heard the guests roaring and saw Emmett and Rosalie making out like fucking teenagers. Well, not like this teenager. Maybe Jasper and Alice. I'm not getting any action.

I turned back to look at Bella, but she wasn't there. Fuck. I thought the song had worked. Time to try a little harder. I pulled the note I had written earlier from my pocket and walked over to Jasper and Alice.

"Great song, dude. Emmett has some varied taste in music, huh?" Jasper laughed. "Are you wearing jumpsuits and singing the Backstreet Boys next?" he asked as he dodged my fist.

"No, asshole, but I could borrow your really cool stud earrings to complete my outfit," I shot back.

"I was experimenting with my look, Edward," Jasper whined. Alice giggled, but clapped her hand over her mouth to stifle the sound.

"You both sounded amazing, Edward. Everyone loved it," Alice gushed.

"Thanks. Can you help me get this note to Bella? I'm going to set up for our date. Hopefully she will still go." I handed the paper over to Jazz, and left the reception for the small banquet room I had borrowed for our date.

I waited for Bella in the conference room with the things I bought for her surprise. I tried to make it special for her, since it was her birthday and no one had even paid attention to her except for Alice. I wanted her to know that I was thinking about her – and she was special to me.

I was lighting the candles when a voice whispered to me, "Edward?" But it was all wrong.

I turned to see a familiar face. But it wasn't Bella's. The smile faded from my face as I realized it was one of the bridesmaids. I don't remember her name, but I remembered the looks she gave me. I shuddered involuntarily. This wasn't good. She moved closer and I stepped back. "Um, hi, uh – I'm sorry I don't remember your name," I stammered, wary of this mini-cougar. "I'm waiting for my girlfriend, Bella. Can I help you?"

"Samantha. And I came to help you. With whatever. However," she purred. Yuck. I'm allergic to cats. She ran her hand across my chest and I flinched at the contact. Seriously, what the hell?

"Um, Samantha, I would really appreciate it if you left so I can be alone with my girl. She's going to be here any minute, and I don't want her to get the wrong idea," I said, more forcefully than before.

"Your little mousy brunette isn't coming. She threw this in the trash then started talking to some guy. They looked really cozy in the dark corner," she said, holding up a folded paper. I recognized it as the note I left for Bella.

No. She wouldn't throw it away. She couldn't. My throat started tightening as I could feel a sense of panic and dread.

"No," I repeated out loud.

"Yes," she cooed into my ear, as she got way too close for my comfort.

"No, Samantha. No matter what happened, nothing is going on with you and me," I tried to push her away gently, but she grabbed onto my shirt.

"C'mon Eddie, I can do lots of things the little girl doesn't even know about," she oozed. Yeah, it was like pus. Jeez, she won't give up. She was all over me.

"Listen, Bella -"

"Bella is right here," a voice rang out from behind me. "And she's about to beat someone's ass."

Son of a bitch. I was fucked. I spun around to see my girl staring us down. She did look pissed.

"Bella, baby, I swear I wasn't doing anything with -" I tried to explain, but Bella stopped me by putting up her hand. She put herself in between the hoochie and me.

"Edward, let me handle this. I know what's going on. This bitch has been trying to get into your pants since yesterday. Now I'm going to give her what she deserves," Bella spat out angry words at the now sneering Samantha. I have to admit, after realizing she wasn't pissed at me, her words made the previously mentioned pants tighten in the groin area.

"What are you going to do, little girl? You can't handle a man like him. I was doing you a favor by taking that note," she said and Bella launched herself at her. I grabbed her quickly by the waist before she got too far.

"Let me go, Edward," she screeched. "I'm going to kick her ass!"

"No, I am," another voice rang out in the room. Rose. Seriously, what the hell was going on? Is this the fucking WWE? Rose, Emmett, Jasper, and Alice all walked into the room. "Jasper told us what happened and we came as soon as possible. I knew you were slutty, but this is ridiculous! How dare you put the moves on my sister's boyfriend and my brother in law? You need to get the hell out of here and never, ever speak to me again," Rose yelled at her as she stormed out. "You are so lucky I didn't want to ruin my dress, whore!" She turned to Bella, "I'm so sorry, sis. I shouldn't have invited her. She was not even that good of a friend." I let go of Bella, and they both hugged and started crying. Then Alice got in the embrace and they all started rambling and sobbing.

I turned to the guys and asked, "Can someone tell me what the fuck just happened?"

Jasper looked sheepish. "It was my fault, Edward. I left the note on the table instead of giving it to Bella. I, well, Alice and I were. . ."

"Yeah, I get it," I said.

Jasper continued, "She must have heard us talking and taken it. Later we saw Bella and she asked for you and we realized she never got the note. She came over here -"

"And I saw her all over you and I wanted to punch her in the trachea," Bella said softly. She was kind of red and puffy from crying, but more beautiful than ever because of the way she looked at me.

I walked towards her and grabbed her hand. I brought it to my lips and told her, "I'm sorry. For everything. I promise nothing happened."

She stopped me before I could continue, "I know, Edward. I heard what you were telling her, and I'm not mad about the Emmett thing. I overreacted. Can we just do what you had planned, you know, before this happened?"

"You still want to, after all of this?" I made a wild, circular motion with my arm indicating all of our friends and family.

"I especially want to, because of this," she grabbed my hand and brought it to her lips, then her heart.

I fucking gulped a lungful of air trying not to hyperventilate, and then practically yelled, "Everyone needs to get the fuck out."

Emmett snorted, and thankfully, they all took the hint. The door clicked and we were alone. Bella giggled and looked around for the first time. Earlier she was focused on possible assault and battery. I clicked on the music and turned down the lights to show her my handiwork.

"Wow, Edward. Why did you do all this? For me?" she asked in an incredulous voice.

I pulled her close to me and looked in her eyes, so there would be no mistake.

"Yeah, you, Bella. It's always been you."

She blinked twice, a fat tear escaping the corner of her eye. I brushed it away with my thumb, and then kissed that spot. She wrapped her arms around my neck and finally she was mine. I leaned down as she tilted her head toward me, our lips meeting, then parting. We swayed softly, rhythmically, to the U2 song playing as we kissed. All of the doubts we had disappeared, replaced by sighs and whispers of affection.

The song ended too soon, if you ask me, but I wanted to show her the other things I had for her. We walked hand in hand to the table where I had placed her birthday cake. I lit the candles and sat her down across from me so I could see her face. Her eyes were shining and glassy with tears. I felt like a million dollars with my girl looking at me like that.

"Edward, you went to so much trouble with the flowers and the music and everything. How do I thank you?" she said softly, holding my hand.

"Just be my girl, Bella. I'd do anything for you," I replied. I may have had something in my eyes because they got a little watery, too. She nodded her head and smiled, a wide grin that lit up her face so brightly we didn't need candlelight. Well, not that bright, but you get the idea.

"Make a wish, Bella," I whispered.

"It already came true."

**End Notes**

Thank you to everyone who reads this story. If you enjoyed the chapter, click review and let me know what parts you liked.


	22. Ch 22 Here Comes Your Man

**A/N**

**For reals, it's a new chapter. Cosmo threatened to cut me off with a text-bargo if I didn't finish. This is the final regular chapter of Yeah, You. An epilogue will follow.**

**The chapter song rules.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 22**

**Here Comes Your Man**

**BPOV**

"So did you blow heem like I say?" James asked as we unpacked our things.

"James!" I exclaimed, embarrassed. "We just got together. I can't - I mean, no. Just no."

Alice laughed and threw in her opinion, "She means not yet, James. It's only a matter of time."

Bitch. But she was probably right. Edward and I could barely keep our hands off of each other. Hands. His hands were a thing of beauty - long, thin fingers. He could be a hand model if he wanted. Like George on _Seinfeld_. Yeah, I really watch too much television. But, since I now had a boyfriend, that was probably going to stop. Yay. I did a happy dance in my head.

Boyfriend.

Edward Cullen. Score one for the Swan.

"And zen you stick your tongue in and swirl . . . ." James was giving another sex talk? Hmm. Now I had someone to try that out on. I glanced at Alice who had a strange look on her face.

"I don't think so." Alice blushed bright red.

"What's the big deal, Alice? You kiss Jasper all the time. It's just more swirly." I couldn't understand her attitude. Christ, they practically had mouth sex in the backseat of Edward's Volvo on the way back from Seattle. James drove Alice's car back so we could drive together. Once I had some Edward, I didn't want to let him go. Would you?

"Zee? Bella knows how to pleeze a man. Just tell heem not to clench," James said.

Clench? His teeth? I looked puzzledly at the two of them.

"Sorry, Miss Toss His Salad. I just don't go there," Alice huffed.

Oh.

I had obviously missed a very important part of the sex talk.

"Um, yeah, so . . . what outfit should I wear to school tomorrow? It's my first "official" day as Edward's girlfriend," I said, trying to change the subject. I think I was just going to stick to Internet porn for advice from now on. It wasn't as graphic.

Actually the outfit wasn't very important. I needed to wear an invisibility cloak so people wouldn't stare at Edward and me. Or, what if Edward didn't even talk to me? Sigh. I didn't even know how to act. Pathetic. I could ask Alice; she and Jasper were a natural fit. I definitely wasn't asking James. That example would probably involve an orifice of some kind.

"Bella, it's going to be fine. Edward is great." Alice spoke softly but assuredly. Of course my best friend sensed my nervousness. She patted my hand as she looked at me and grinned.

"Thanks, Alice. I'm just a little - ahhhhhhhh. . . " I ran my hands through my hair. "Excited?"

"Well, of course. I've seen heem. Jeesuz," James fanned himself. "I theenk I would eexplode from zee hotness."

"Um, yeah." The boy looked good in sweats, for shit's sake. For once I knew what James was talking about. Edward's hotness could make a girl, or boy, spontaneously combust. I've actually ruined clothing fantasizing about him.

I picked out my clothes for tomorrow, only fighting for a bit with Alice and James. I had to stick up for my rights - the right to not dress like teen hooker. "In the name of love, Bella," she said, solemnly, holding up a glorified band-aid. It was just like her to play on my love of U2 to get me to dress like a hootchie. I don't think teen seduction was the theme Bono had in mind when he wrote that line. Blasphemy.

"Seriously, Alice? I already got him to like me. Why do I have to dress slutty? He doesn't like that anyway."

"Wut a pair of lucky beetches. Zee hottest men want you," James added as he stared at Alice's gossip magazine. "Jeezus, did you see zee peecture of Rob's giant-"

"Not slutty, Bella. Hot. You do realize he's the hottest guy, after Jasper of course, in the Pacific Northwest? And every girl now knows that he and Tanya broke up. So he's fair game, according to the gossip. You need to show that you are the one he wants and the other skanks have no chance," she explained.

"Hey, earlier you said it was going to be fine," I whined.

"Of course it is. You just have to be prepared."

I thought about her words. Was I up to that challenge? I took another look at the scrap of fabric she wanted me to wear. I tossed it and picked out my own outfit. If Edward wanted girls who wore that crap, then he wasn't for me. Tanya could have him.

"This is what I'm wearing, and that's final. Now, gimme the magazine so I can see the wonder peen."

Alice left to call Jasper a while later - because I really didn't want to hear phone sex. James left to do. . . yeah, I didn't ask. I'm sure it would've been rated NC-17. I relaxed on the couch watching some lame reality show featuring some unnaturally tanned losers.

"Bells?" my dad called out.

"Yeah, Dad. I'm in here." He walked over to me and sat down on the couch. His face looked sad and he sighed.

"Isabella, I'm so sorry about your birthday, kiddo. Your mom and I are devastated that we forgot. I know your sister's wedding is no excuse, but we hope you'll forgive us. I hope your day wasn't completely miserable." I smiled inwardly at the thought of my night with Edward. It had been amazing.

"Daddy, I'm fine, really. I had lots of fun at the wedding. And after." I couldn't help blushing.

He noticed my face and asked, "Is there something I should know?"

"It's a boy, Daddy. I met a boy." I looked up at him, nervously awaiting some sort of comment. His face showed surprise, then . . . resignation.

"And you like him? He likes you?" he asked. "Is he good enough for you, baby?"

"He's," I paused to think of something that would explain how I felt, ". . . everything." I explained how Edward was Emmett's brother and we went to school together. He seemed to accept the fact that I was grown up with a boyfriend. He ended our talk with a reminder to "be safe" and I nearly choked when I realized he wasn't talking about looking both ways at the crosswalk. We hugged and he walked back to his room mumbling about his baby girls being all grown up and needing to clean his shotguns. I giggled and sighed as I thought about Edward.

My phone buzzed with a text. Edward.

_**"Hey. I can't stop thinking about you. Counting the minutes til I see you again."**_

One text and I'm basically useless. He's romantic and hot? It's really not fair to other teenaged boys.

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**EPOV**

"Can you put the phone down and pay attention to me?" Jasper whined.

"Oh, I'm sorry. You can't get enough of me, baby?" I winked and blew an exaggerated kiss at my best friend. "Don't be jealous of Bella, Jazz. You'll always be my first love."

"Shut the fuck up, Edward," Jasper growled. "Is it so wrong to want you to listen to me instead of you sighing and moaning as you text your girlfriend? It's disturbing."

"Like I don't have to listen to your whipped ass all the time," I retorted as I flicked him in the arm.

"Touché, ass. So, tomorrow is going to be interesting, huh?" Jasper commented and gave me a thigh punch.

"Fucker, that hurt," I winced. "What do you mean?" I asked as I settled down on my bed.

"Ok, you realize that you just broke up with Tanya and you're going to school tomorrow with a new girlfriend. And said girlfriend is the most talked about thing in Forks in years."

I thought about what Jasper said. I kinda looked slutty. In a manly way of course. But guys have the benefit of a double standard, so therefore, I'm not a boy-slut. I'm just popular. As long as Bella is with me, I won't care what others say anyway. But what would Tanya do? I hadn't thought about her at all. I was sorta making out with Bella all night. I mean really, why the fuck would I think of that skank when Bella was in my arms? Tanya only came up this morning when I came clean about about her being my fake girfriend. Bella was very understanding about the whole situation. Relieved, I would dare say.

"Tanya and the rest of the Trollope Triplets can bite me. Besides, she was the one doing a sophomore in the bathroom at my house."

Jasper shuddered. "Gross. I can't even piss in there now."

"You just want to piss in my bathroom. You're hoping I'll walk in on you or something, you freak."

Jasper attempted to junk punch me. I rolled off the bed onto my ass.

"Fucker. You almost got my balls," I whined as I rubbed my thigh.

"You'd like that too much." I flipped him off and he returned the favor.

"Listen dude, just watch out for those girls. They're ruthless. They've already tried to make her cry. Alice told me." I think I growled when he said that.

"Well then, I'll just have to be by her side twenty-four seven so those skanks can't say shit." And I leaned back on my bed and tucked my arms behind my head.

"Do you want me to pick out an outfit for you for tomorrow?" I looked at him to see if he was serious or fucking with me. "You know you can't just neglect your appearance now that you have a serious girlfriend. You need to make an effort."

"Can you come by in the morning to blow my hair?"

"You know what you can blow, Cullen." He made a BJ motion with his hand and mouth. Gross. I mean, from him. I wonder if Bella would be up for that? Hmm. How do I bring that up?

Jasper's phone started ringing - "Sweet Child O' Mine"- Alice. His face broke into a wide grin. "I'm out of here, Fuckward. Don't jerk off too hard after I leave."

"Suck it, Jazzy. I'm not going to jerk off."

Ok, I totally lied. Yeah, I stroked it. Twice.

That was the twentieth and twenty-first time I dreamt of Bella Swan.

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**Monday **

I awoke early the next day. I was feeling good thanks to my wank session and the promise of seeing my girl again. I had to get there early so I would be waiting for her. I walked downstairs to the kitchen for breakfast. My mother and father were already eating.

"Good morning, sweetie. You're up so early," my mom said.

"He has a certain brown-eyed girl waiting for him," my dad teased. I threw a bagel at him. "C' mon, Edward. I saw the way you were looking at Rosalie's sister. And both of you conveniently left the reception. . ."

"Dad," I whined.

"Carlisle, don't tease him. I think Bella is lovely. Much better than that harlot, Tanya," my mother shuddered. I snorted and and grabbed another bagel. She reached over and tousled my hair. "Such a handsome boy. My baby is all grown up," she sniffled.

I was slightly embarrassed, and ready to tease her, but then I remembered that my brother just got married. I pulled my mom into a hug because it seemed like she needed one. She choked out a sob and then whispered, "I hope she deserves you, Edward."

"I know she does, mom. And I love you."

My dad sang "Brown-eyed Girl' as I left for school. Van Morrison wept from afar. Or from the grave. Whatever. My dad was a shitty singer.

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**BPOV**

He was leaning against his Volvo when we pulled into the parking lot. Jasper was by his side. Edward's legs were crossed at the ankles and his long fingers dipped into the pockets of his jeans. He wore a light grey henley that showcased the abs that I knew were hiding beneath the thin layer of cotton. He was. . . perfection. Jasper was just as lethal, but Alice could drool over him. I only had saliva for one guy. And I wanted to save it to swap with him later. They both grinned when they saw it was us and my heart skipped.

"Damn. It's like an ad for Abercrombie and Fitch, only hotter," Alice gasped. She wasn't kidding. Edward's lips were so red and juicy, I thought he had on lip gloss. "Quick, take a picture with your phone!" she demanded. Yeah, that was going to be my new screen saver.

Alice parked next to the boys and we got out to greet them. Edward stared at me as he walked toward me like a. . .really cool jungle animal. I don't know which one - I was frozen, my brain apparently shut down, too. My girlie parts were on high alert, however.

"Hey."

"He-ey." It came out like a sigh. His eyes honed in on my lips as he greeted me with a kiss. He wrapped an arm around me as we walked towards the school.

"Edward?"

"Yeah?" he breathed in my ear. He nibbled on my lobe. Lucky his arm was wrapped tightly around me or I would've melted to the ground.

"Everyone's looking at us."

"No, they're not." He glanced around. Several people had stopped and were blatantly staring. One junior actually bumped into a car because she wasn't looking where she was going.

"Okay, yeah. She was staring."

"Doesn't it bother you?"

"No, not really. You get used to it."

Of course he would be used to it. I mean, look at him.

The morning passed by surprisingly uneventfully. Edward walked me to all my classes, drawing looks from everyone - especially when he kissed me goodbye. In the classes we had together, we now sat next to each other. By lunchtime I was smirking at the girls who gaped at us. Yeah, they could bite me.

I would bite Edward. He was yummy.

During lunch, the four of us sat with Angela and Ben in the cafeteria. We were talking about the wedding when I noticed Tanya glaring at me. I rolled my eyes and looked away. I leaned into Edward and he wrapped his arm around me. I glanced back and smiled at Tanya. I think she crushed a soda can with her bare hands. Freak. I resumed my interest in the conversation at the table, which was about the bachelorette party. Alice was telling everyone about how I got trashed. Thanks, bestie. Edward and Jasper started cracking up and looking at each other.

"What?" I demanded. "Like you two didn't get tore up that night. At least I wasn't as bad as Rosalie," I huffed. Jasper snorted and Edward elbowed him in the ribs.

". . . and Bella was so drunk, I don't know how she got back to our room. Jasper and I, um, stayed in his suite until Edward got back and I felt better. Bella, how did you even walk? Jasper had to carry me," Alice explained.

My mind went back to that night and it became clear. Son of a . . . I hadn't been dreaming. It was Edward in the flesh. I whirled around to face him. "You," I pointed, "It wasn't a dream. I -I attacked you and you were so nice and hot and oh my god, how embarrassing," I wailed. "I thought I was dreaming of a threesome with you and Justin Timberlake, but it was really you. Oh, no. I remember humping your leg." I buried my face into his shirt to hide my embarrassment.

"I don't mind helping you," he whispered in my ear. "I kinda like it."

Then, two things happened at once. Alice started screaming "Oh my god, Jasper, Edward was wearing your boy band shirt" and I looked up to see Tanya coming toward us with a full tray of food. I knew instantly she was going to dump it on me. Somehow with my less than stellar reflexes, I pushed the tray right as she was tipping it over me. The contents poured down the front of her shirt.

"Aaaaaahhrrgghhhh! You bitch!" She sputtered and screamed obscenities at me. Like I gave a crap. I remembered the time she tormented me at the lockers with her stupid lies and I said nothing. Not this time.

"Really, Edward? This is the best you could do for a fake girlfriend?" I commented as calmly as possible. "You would've been better off pretending to be gay. That would have been more realistic. Did anyone actually think you liked her?" Edward burst out laughing and the whole table joined in. I waved as Tanya stormed away. Her entourage slithered out behind her.

"You're sorta badass, Bella Swan. I'm glad you're mine," Edward said just before he kissed me.

I vaguely heard Alice in the background saying something about "Jasper" and "JT" and "so hot" but I didn't care. My brain (my mouth, actually) was very much occupied.

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PE wasn't as bad as it normally was. I now gawked at Edward with a purpose and without fear of getting caught. He actually winked when he caught me. One time he licked his lips.

Da-amn.

After class, I washed off all of the sweat from well, looking at Edward. I didn't actually participate in a sport. I turned off the water and reached for my towel. Fuck. It must've fallen off the hook. But when I opened the door to the dressing area, everything was gone. Including my clothes. Motherfuck.

Tears welled and panic set in. Why would someone do this to me? Oh, right. They were jealous of me and Edward. Wait, not they. She. Bitch. I should have known she'd try to get even with me after the tray incident. I thought about all the times I had been embarrassed at my old school. I never stood up for myself. I was a timid girl with no friends. Well, not anymore.

I got pissed and thought of a plan. Everyone was gone, which she had probably orchestrated so no one would help me. I walked into the locker room naked as the day I was born. I looked around for something that I could use to pop someone's lock. I had never been so glad to find an old, gross comb.

I silently thanked my daddy for showing how to pick a lock when I was twelve. I opened a few lockers, finally finding a towel. It was small, but it would cover all the important parts.

Now that was the easy part of this plan.

I had to go out into the gym. What the hell, the whole school had stared all day anyway. Now at least there was something to see. Just hopefully not too much. I held my head high and strutted into that gym. That whore and her friends weren't going to see me cry.

Noise in the form of gasps and shouts and a few whistles (thank you very much) erupted, but then it was eerily quiet as I marched straight towards Tanya who was holding a bag, which likely contained my clothes. She was talking to her stupid slutty friends.

I snatched them out of her unsuspecting hands. Her lovely friends didn't even warn her. They probably wanted to see some fireworks. Well, I was about to shove a rocket up her ass.

"Thank you, Tanya for holding my clothes. If you wanted to see me naked you could've peeked at me through the shower door like a normal pervert would."

She gaped at me with her mouth hanging open. She quickly recovered, though. "I just found these lying around. I thought they were rags so I was going to put them in the trash," she simpered.

Oh, hell no.

"I guess you weren't able to comprehend what appropriate clothing looks like since you dress like a hooker," I spat.

"You're the boyfriend stealer, not me!" she shrieked.

"What boyfriend? The one you were making out with under the bleachers two weeks ago while Edward was twenty feet away? Not even. He was what, like twenty-five? Gross. And weren't you doing Mike in Edward's bathroom last week?" A bunch of guys whistled. I think they high-fived Mike. "Or are you referring to this week's conquest?"

She looked like she could kill me, but did nothing.

"Just leave it alone, Tanya. You," I jabbed my finger towards her, "can't push me around." Oh shit, I was jabbing a little too forcefully and I felt my towel start to slip. Just then I felt arms grip me around my shoulders.

"What the hell are you wearing?"

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**EPOV**

I walked out of the boys' locker room thinking about how lucky I was to have Bella in my life. Yes, I realize these are deep thoughts considering I'm an eighteen year-old man. What can I say, I'm special. My mother would agree.

I walked into the gym to wait for Bella. I scanned the area for her. Oh, there she is. . .in a towel? What the fuck? I ran to her side and grabbed her just before the whole school saw what was mine. No fucking way all these assholes were going see that. Only me. I asked her what she was wearing and I threw her over my shoulder and headed for the locker room so she could get dressed. I put my hand over her ass. The towel was kinda small.

"Bella, please tell me you have a good reason for walking around almost naked? Other than you wanted to give all my teammates wood." I set her down on the bench. "Don't get me wrong, you look incredibly hot, but I was hoping that when you were naked, I would be too and we'd be alone."

"Really? That's flattering," she sighed. I chuckled. Sometimes she says some crazy stuff.

"So," I prompted.

Her eyes blazed as she explained what happened. "So-o, your fucking fake ex-bitch stole my clothes and I found a towel and I'm sick of her pushing me around so I went out there to tell her off and my towel got loose and then you were there," she rambled.

I exhaled as I ran my hands through my hair. "I'm sorry you had to deal with my mistakes, Bella. Are you ok?"

"I'm alright, but my shirt didn't make it," she said as she held up the scraps of her ruined blouse. "My PE clothes are torn, too. Only my jeans are intact. And I guess they didn't want to touch my underwear. Or maybe they didn't know what they were since they never wear any."

Bella got dressed while I seethed. I'd never hit a woman before, but I could totally kick Tanya's ass right now. She walked out from behind the locker, arms crossing her chest, her ruined shirt gaping open. I gulped at the sight of her lacy bra but I kept my self in check. I just couldn't attack her after all that drama. So I responsibly pulled my shirt over my head and handed it to her. Luckily I had worn a thin wife beater underneath my shirt today.

"I'm so sorry, baby. For everything," I breathed. She gazed at me as she put on my shirt. It wasn't anger in her eyes, it was . . .lust? Bella launched herself at me and I caught her in my arms as we crashed against the lockers. Her mouth covered mine and her tongue snaked out - tasting and probing. Jesus. Her hands latched onto the hair at the nape of my neck, pulling me closer. I was practically swallowing her and it was fucking awesome. Then I heard something. Fuck.

Voices in the distance caused us to break apart briefly, but Bella yanked my arm towards the back row of the lockers. I could hear that someone was looking for us, but they assumed we had already left when they saw the empty room. I looked at her, my eyes questioning her.

"Don't go, Edward," she breathed.

"Never," I whispered into her mouth. Her hands roamed under my shirt, my muscles tightening as she touched me. Damn, I wanted to do the same thing. As my lips wandered up her neck, I slowly inched my way under her shirt - my shirt - and second base was a wonderful thing. Second base made we want to try out for Varsity so maybe I could work my way home. Not today, but someday. Bella moaned as I touched her. I loved the way her body wrapped around me, every inch pressed against me. I wondered if she knew how hard I was for her. Her lips found my neck, then her hand grazed my crotch.

"Ohhh." It came out like a moan. I wanted to hear that sound again.

So, yeah, she knew now. And she liked it, judging by the way she was now fondling me through my jeans. My hips rocked against her hand. It was amazing, but I wanted more. My hand slipped behind her, over her incredible ass and gripped her thigh. I hitched it up over my hip and rocked against her once, to see if she wanted this, wanted me. She rolled her hips back into me, kissing me harder and faster, so I picked up my rhythm. I started out awkwardly, but I knew I was hitting the right spot by the way she was panting into my neck. She hopped up onto me trying to get closer - wrapping both legs around me - which gave me a better angle. We weren't even kissing at this point, just breathing hard and clutching each other. "Please don't stop, Edward," she begged. She held me still, like she didn't want me to lose that perfect spot.

"God, Bella. You feel so good," I moaned. And then she gripped my neck so hard it fucking hurt, but the sounds she made erased all of the pain because I knew she was . . . "Oh, yes, Bella. Fuck, you're coming. I can feel it."

"Mmmmm. Ed. Ward. Ohhh," she shuddered. I mentally high-fived myself and gave myself a fist-bump while I kept grinding against her. My thrusting was fast and erratic as I was almost there.

"Oh, baby, yesss," I groaned. Then I was pulsing hot streams into my jeans. It was messy, but perfect. I couldn't believe how much better that was than my own hand.

"Baby, are you ok?" I asked her as I kissed the tip of her nose. She laughed softly.

"That was amazing."

"I know, I can't wait to do it again." I nuzzled her neck with my nose.

"I need some time, Edward," she protested. My heart sank.

"Are you breaking up with me?" I blurted. "Did I ruin everything?"

She started giggling uncontrollably and blushed fiery red. "God, no, Edward. My cootchie just needs to get over the crotch burn. We're going to do that as much as possible. And maybe without the clothes."

And that's when I fell in love with Bella Swan.

She would own every part of me for the rest of my life. In later years when we spoke about that day in the locker room, she would tell me that she knew it, too.

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**End notes:**

**Sorry about the long wait. I adore all of the people who read this story, and I thank you for your patience.**

**Every review and favorite I've received has been sincerely appreciated even though I haven't responded. I wish I could call all of you to thank you personally.**

**I must thank my beta and lovah, Cosmogirl7481 for motivating me and putting up with my whining. You are the best fic-wife and bestie. ILY, sofa king much.**

**Follow me on Twitter, marvar29 if you enjoy Rob p0rn and nonsense**


	23. Ch 23 In Your Eyes

**Chapter 23 Epilogue**

**In Your Eyes…**_I am complete_

**BPOV**

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So, I have a few minutes…let me tell you what's happened.

Remember Rosalie, my sister? Well, after she married Emmett they had like fifty kids and Rose is totally fat now. Ok, they "only" have five, but it seems like fifty. Trust me, I had to babysit them. Twice. Neither event is on my top ten moments of all time. Those all feature someone else. But I'll get back to that later.

My nephews and niece are actually very cute, of course. Emmett plus Rosalie equals perfect genetics. Everyone fawns all over them. The only real controversy was when Emmett wanted to name all of the kids after him. Yeah, I didn't want a family member named "Prince Emmett the second" or "Emmettina."

Anyway, Rose isn't completely fat (I'm prone to exaggeration – it's the writer in me). She gained a few pounds on her "perfect" body. Emmett loves it, however. He's always pinching her ass and saying, "More cushion for the pushin'." Yeah, he's gross, but my sister lives for that shit.

They live in San Francisco now because Emmett got traded to the 49ers two years ago. Rose claims she likes it there and it's not that far from Seattle, though they don't visit much. I guess that's a pitfall of having a family the size of a basketball team. I drove with them to the market once…and I still have nightmares. I can't imagine driving from San Fran all the way to Seattle.

I'm thinking about what that must've been like when I get a text from James asking where I am.

"Where the hell does he think I am?" I mutter to myself. I giggle as I text him a snotty response.

James also lives in California now. After college, he got a job as personal trainer. He got a certain chubby actress back in shape and now he's actually quite famous as a trainer to the stars. He developed a "booty boot camp" workout (yeah, he's an ass specialist) and has several popular DVDs. I tried it once…I couldn't sit down for a week. I decided my ass looks good the way it is, and I haven't received any complaints. I sent the DVD to Rosalie. Big mistake. She didn't speak to me for a while. But I did get a month off from hearing about how Emmett "fills" her so completely, which must be a feat because she did have five giant babies. It was a nice break from the grossness.

James married a movie producer and they have a Shih Tzu and live in Malibu. He and Alec recently adopted a baby girl from China. I think he got the idea from one of his clients (Angelina, *cough* *cough*), but that's just my opinion. He's completely happy and I get frequent calls with sex advice, some of which are welcome. The rest is…disturbing. Like the pictures he texted of him breastfeeding Bree with his high-priced man-boob. Nothing is an over share for James.

The last time I saw him was at the baptism. He was holding the baby. No, not that baby.

My brother.

No, I'm not shitting you. My mom got pregnant a month after Rosalie did – which was like five minutes after her wedding (probably during the limo ride). So my brother is a month younger than my nephew. It's sorta embarrassing, but my mom looks good for her age – she's only been accused of being little Charlie's grandma once. And since Rose and I aren't living at home anymore, my mom and dad haven't been alone. I laugh aloud as I remember my dad chasing around little Charlie last night and muttering about needing a walker soon.

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"Hurry up, Bella. It's time," my best friend says. Alice walks toward me and pulls me into a fierce hug. I almost lose it. I've been on the verge of tears all day as I got ready, thinking about my life since I met him…

Edward.

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Senior Prom. That was the second time I saw him in a tux. Trust me, the sight of that man in formal wear is like insta-lube on my lady parts. Sorry if that's TMI. You just have no idea. Sigh. It was great night. It was the first time…_you know_.

Oh, not having sex. We did that the month before... Those stories where your first time is a magical, never-ending orgasm – what a load of shit. It hurt. Bad. Edward is what one would call "well-endowed." Trying to get his fucking huge penis inside me was more difficult than trying to get Rosalie to stop popping out kids. But it got better. And that night it was really good. Yeah, _that_ good.

So after that, we really couldn't keep our hands off of each other. My dad almost catching us in my room forced us to be a little more careful. The Volvo saw a lot of action that summer.

We both went to Dartmouth like we planned. Things were hard for a while as we adjusted to college life. If you are waiting for me to tell you we broke up, or someone cheated, well, you're reading the wrong story. This is angst-free.

Edward continued with medical school as I worked on my Master's degree and things were great. But when I graduated and he still had two years left, we ran into a problem. I got a job at a Seattle publishing firm and the distance nearly broke us up. Edward transferred to UDub for his final two years - just for me. He said he couldn't stay away from me. Sigh.

Have I said how much I love this man?

Edward has been my everything for the last eight years. My first love, my only love…and in about an hour he'll be my husband.

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"Bella, it looks perfect," Jasper sighs as he smoothes the satin of my dress. "I pictured exactly what it would look like when Edward showed me the ring."

"I love it, Jasper," I gush as I hug him. "Thank you for the perfect dress." Alice and Jasper are fussing over me, helping me with the finishing touches. They've had their own designer label for several years. It turned out that Jasper loved clothes even more than Alice. They designed all of the clothes for our wedding, including Edward's tux.

They live in LA now so I don't get to see them very often. They have a little boy named Peter, but still haven't gotten married. They've been engaged for five years, but they're in no rush to plan a wedding.

Because Edward and I both miss our best friends, and our brother and sister are now living in California, we've decided to move, too. Edward got a job at Cedars and I will be working on my book from home. Yes, I know I'm lucky to be able to make this happen. I'm reminded of how fortunate I am every time I look at Edward.

My mom and dad are thinking about moving back to Arizona when my dad retires, so they'll be close, too. He had to push that back since he has another kid to put through college. He's always grumbling about being a senior citizen when Charlie, Jr. graduates. My mom glares at him and reminds him that he was the one who didn't want to get a vasectomy. When that convo starts, I usually leave the room. I don't like to hear about my dad's testicles.

Alice finishes with my veil and pronounces me "ready." "I'm so happy for you, Bella. You two were meant to be together."

"I know, Al. But it seems like yesterday that I was dancing with him in the Forks' gym."

"Or dry-humping him in the locker room," Alice adds. Jasper snorts and I shoot him a dirty look.

"Like I didn't catch you two getting busy enough times to scar me for life," I retort. "Besides, how could I keep away from him?" Alice and I giggle.

Jasper grins. "That is very true. I'm surprised that after seeing me in action you still decided to marry Edward."

I chuck a box of tissues at his head.

"Speaking of Forks High, did you see Mike Newton's wife? Oh, my god," Alice exclaims. "She nearly caused a riot."

Mike Newton, former geek extraordinaire, was now a multi-millionaire. He created some social networking Internet site and he recently married a Sports Illustrated swimsuit cover model. I had kept in touch with him after high school and while he was at MIT.

"She's all right, if you like that type." Jasper shrugs.

"Whatever, Jasper. I'd put her on my celebrity sex list." Alice says.

"Damn. Now that'd be interesting," Jasper mutters.

"How about you, Bella? Would she make your five?" Alice asks.

"You know my five is just Edward and Robert Pattinson. It hasn't changed. Although I thought about dropping him when he wore that stupid outfit to the People's Choice Awards. And don't get me started on the ridiculous Capri pants."

"Well, I hate to break up the sex talk, but I need to get out there and stand with Mr. Pretty Eyes and wait for you to come down the aisle," Jasper says. He winks at me and blows a kiss to Alice and leaves the room. A moment later my dad knocks. He smiles when he sees me.

"You look beautiful, Bells."

"Thank you, daddy," I whisper. I try not to cry and ruin my makeup. "Don't let me fall, dad," I say as I grasp his arm.

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I see him at the end of the aisle. He's still the beautiful boy I fell in love with - just more. I ignore the members of my wedding party marching in front of me – Alice and Jasper, Rosalie, my brother the ring-bearer - and all of our friends and family that surround us. I have Edward-blinders on.

He's whispering to Emmett, who's his best man. When the music starts, his eyes snap to me and I see the love he's held for me all these years reflected in his eyes. I still get butterflies in my stomach whenever I see him. I know that will never change. I practically run down the aisle toward him.

Toward my future.

Edward.

It's always been him.

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**Long-ass A/N:**

**Thank you to everyone who has read this story (especially my original five readers – you know who you are). I have appreciated every review, though I'm fail at replying. **

**I started this a year and a half ago, and I cringe when I read the first chapters. But I feel like I've grown over this time (I'm not talking about the size of my ass) and I thank those of you who've been with me for this fluffy ride. **

**Thank you to Rose Arcadia who made the best 80s blinkie ever for YY, and everyone who supported and rec'd this little fic.**

**I have to write a love letter to my bestie, Cosmogirl7481, who jumped on my crazytrain about halfway through this. If it wasn't for her, YY wouldn't be finished and it would **_**really**_** suck. J/S. I adore you, and I can't adequately express my feelings for you. It would be mushy and embarrassing.**


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